Silent Assassins

I enjoy the occasional crappy 80s action film, and with its cheesy cover depicting a pistol-packing Linda Blair scowling alongside washed-up Flash Gordon star Sam Jones, Silent Assassins piqued my interest enough for me to cough up a couple of quid for it on eBay. Unsurprisingly, this low-budget action flick, from directors Lee Doo Yong and Scott Thomas, proved to be almost as bad as I expected it to be, and, as a result, it was reasonably entertaining stuff.

Jones plays gum-chewing super-cop Sam Kettle; Blair is his long suffering girlfriend Sarah, who wants her man to give up his dangerous job. After a brush with death whilst chasing CIA-agent-turned-bad Kendrick (Gustav Vintas), Sam finally agrees to hang up his gun. However, when Dr. London, a top biochemist, is kidnapped by Kendrick (along with an innocent five year old girl), Sam is reluctantly drawn back into service.

Assisted by the girl's uncle Jun Kim (Jun Chong), Sam attempts to track down his evil nemesis before Dr. London is forced into revealing the details of a secret germ warfare formula that could result in the death of millions.

Firstly, it must be mentioned that, although the cover of the DVD suggests that Linda Blair's character is every bit as tough as her man, this is just not true, and fans of the actress hoping to see her kick ass will most likely be disappointed. Blair spends most of the film trying to convince Sam to quit his job, or canoodling with him under a duvet (and we don't even get to see her norks—shame!).

Still, even without Blair taking part in the action, Silent Assassins is just about worth a look (if you enjoy iffy B-movies, that is) thanks to some wonderfully bad acting (Vintas as Kendrick is exceptionally hammy, cackling and whooping with glee as he goes about his evil business), plenty of violent action (there are some surprisingly nasty moments involving axes and samurai swords), some fun martial arts scenes, and a very daft finalé which sees Jones blowing up almost everything in sight with a rocket launcher (that amazingly never requires reloading).

Sam J Jones stars in this fairly enjoyable action affair as a cop on the trail of some ruthless killers, including a demented ex CIA operative, who are attempting to procure the top secret formula to a potentially devastating biological weapon. Also drawn along for the ride are the excellent pairing of Jun Chong and Phillip Rhee (who gets to display some more of his awesome kicking skills!) who also appeared together in the similarly entertaining Los Angeles Street Fighter aka Ninja Turf (and in fact produced the film being reviewed here to).

Moving along at a cracking pace with some rather well handled action set pieces throughout and a pleasant splattering of gore (including a particularly nasty torture scene!) this is a reasonably satisfying flick and should certainly provide less discriminating action fans with a fairly solid ninety or so minutes of entertainment.

Look out to for the lovely Linda Blair in this as Jones' long suffering wife.

Overall, well worth a watch!

Horrible acting,badly set-up scenes,laughable situations and clich'es from possibly five hundred other movies all combine to create this turkey.But what do you expect from a film with Sam J Jones(Flash Gordon)as the hero and Linda Blair as co star?

Decent action flick, albeit a bit silly and could have used a higher budget. The trailer did its job and got me into it. Poster/cover art is bizarre as hell, though. Instead of the 1 white guy and 2 asian guys trio, there's the white guy and, for some reason, his girlfriend. I don't understand why they dressed her up like that and put her on the cover. There is no such character in the movie. She is just a little love interest and never looks like that in the movie. Not to mention she isn't in any major action scenes. Sam Jones and his two asian buddies score an excellent body count, but she literally fires only one shot in the whole movie, so she goes on the cover, haha. Also, Sam Jones burns through so much bubble gum in the movie that Roddy Piper had none left.

Cop Sam Kettle (Sam Jones) was this close to leaving L.A. with his girlfriend Sara (Linda Blair) before his chief tells him, "We need you." I'm not kidding, they were literally packing the U-Haul when the chief showed up. Seems bio-chemist Dr. London (Bill Erwin) was kidnapped by Kettle's nemesis Kendrick (Gustav Vintas). Tagging along with Sam on his investigation is Jun Kim (Jun Chong), whose niece was kidnapped along with the doctor. The duo team learn from Oyama (Mako) that Kendrick has hired an elite Japanese killing squad and, with help from Oyama's son Bernard (Phillip Rhee), they attack the secret hideout before Kendrick can secure the chemical weapons formula.

This is a step up from NINJA TURF as it has better production values, a name cast and explosions. Yeah, I'm easy. There is some really odd stuff like Vintas - a dead ringer for Tom Noonan - always carrying a red rose, leather clad villainess Miss Amy (Rebecca Ferratti) stating "Don't forget, I'm a bio-chemist too" and Dr. London's strange habit of always holding the kidnapped niece in every shot. Jones seems to be having fun in the role, not taking anything too seriously. The same can be said for Rhee, who is a dojo playboy this time around. Blair is featured on the cover brandishing a gun but her role is as the helpless girlfriend. She disappears completely from the picture around the 50 minute mark. Bill "Superfoot" Wallace gets a cameo as a deceitful Colonel and they never show his face! Given the cliff hanger ending, I suspect they were hoping for a part 2 with him as the lead villain.

As with the earlier TURF, the fights are very well done. Chong and Rhee handled the choreography and this is probably the best aspect of their low budget action flicks. One thing that cracked me up is these silent assassins are the loudest mofos around. Any time they sneak up to kill someone, they let out a huge scream before attacking. So, like NINJA TURF with its lack of ninjas, producer/star Chong again fails to deliver on the title's promise.