Surprise Package

Charlton Heston in his memoirs said that when he was signing for his part in Touch of Evil it was mentioned that Orson Welles was going to be playing the sheriff, but that Universal still hadn't selected a director. Well says Heston, why don't you get Orson Welles to direct. Duh, says the studio heads, that's a splendid idea.

On Surprise Package with none other than Noel Coward in the cast, why didn't they get him to take charge of the whole thing. It is amazing to me that with all the talent in this project a better product didn't emerge.

This is a caper film involving a deported U.S. gangster played by Yul Brynner now living on a Greek island trying to steal the crown of the exiled King of Anatolia played by Coward. Along for the ride is Mitzi Gaynor as Brynner's moll and the baddie played by George Coulouris from the People's Republic of Anatolia, the gang that overthrew the king. The director is Stanley Donen from a novel by humorist Art Buchwald.

Brynner is terribly miscast in his part. A gangster I can believe him as, but he just has no flair for comedy. There were some comic moments in the King and I, but that's overall, a serious part. Coward looks bored by the whole thing, I wish he had scripted and directed it also and he probably wished he did too. George Coulouris was his usual menacing self.

Mitzi Gaynor was a fine musical talent who came along just when musical films were ending. She was probably grateful for a number or two in this film. Jimmy Van Heusen and Sammy Cahn wrote the title tune which she sings as well as Noel Coward. Can you imagine if he had contributed some musical number as well?

The script has some topical references to the Cold War, the Appalachian underworld gathering, rigged quiz shows, etc. etc. that Yul and the cast comment on.

It also would have been nice since this takes place in the Greek Islands to have splurged for some technicolor.

If you see it, try to view it as a curiosity. Someone should have whispered in ears of the studio heads at Columbia the way Charlton Heston did at Universal.

Yul Brynner is very hard to understand in this movie because he talks fast and his accent gets in the way, but he is still eye candy to me nonetheless. He does play a good brat. Not the same sort of brat Rameses was in The Ten Commandments. The brat he plays in this movie is a wealthy gangster who was exiled back to his birth country of Greece. He's not smart by any means, maybe street smart, but he spelled the only correct word in the Scrabble game between he and Gabby. He pouts, he name-calls, he tells people to shut up, he has a tantrum, etc.

Mitzi Gaynor (Gabby) is a cute girlfriend/sidekick to Yul's gangster character (Nico). Noel Coward's character (King Pavel) bores me to tears.

Cute movie, but not brilliant by any means. Some funny parts, but could be funnier.

Arnold Schwarzenegger has gained a wholly unmerited reputation for being able to play comedy precisely because he's so unfunny that he looks even more ludicrous than usual in a comic setting; and Yul Brynner's utter charmlessness actually enhances this Runyonesque comedy which makes good use of Greek locations and a game cast of Britons ranging from Warren Mitchell to Noël Coward.

Damned by Andrew Sarris as "nervously oververbalized", the constant stream of witty dialogue courtesy of screenwriter Harry Kurnitz and/or original novelist Art Buchwald is actually a delight; particularly as delivered by Coward as a deposed king in exile surrounded (evidently with tongue in cheek) by a harem of voluptuous young blondes in bikinis, who also performs the title song with Mitzi Gaynor (displaying a shapely chassis in a succession of eye-popping outfits befitting a gangster's moll).

You can only wonder why theyou bothered to make such a woefully unfunny film.YulBryner next film would be zThe Magnificent Seven,in the role of Chris.Coward would appear in a few more films.This was to be the end of Gaynors film career.What was Stanley Donenen thinking of.In fact the best part of the film were the opening credit titles which were designed by the great Maurice Binder.

I can not understand the negative comments about this film. I think that Yul Brunner is great in this film, mainly because he talks so mauch, which is completely atypical for him. Usually he played rather laconic characters. Noel Coward as ex-king is a perfect choice. Mitzi Gaynor is not the stupid blonde gangster bride, but basically very clever, only she is hardly taken seriously. She is also able to differentiate between good and bad, which the two main male characters, Nico and the ex-king, obviously cannot do. All in all a successful comedy that I can definitely recommend.