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SteveRaccoon

A rejoint le avr. 2003
I really hope nobody ever cares enough to read this, seriously.
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Note de SteveRaccoon
Le Château de Cagliostro

Le Château de Cagliostro

7,6
9
  • 2 sept. 2007
  • 'The' anime film which non-fans could enjoy

    Everything about this relatively family friendly film encourages you to keep watching, from the action to the characters' interplay to the gorgeous backgrounds, even the music. Lupin's Inspector Gadget style inventions coupled with his sneaky plans are great to watch, there's always something else getting schemed up.

    The only problem I have with this movie are a couple of instances of toe-curling dialogue of the vaguely romantic kind - doesn't quite get it right, but perfectly forgivable. Coupled with that, I've seen no other Lupin film which comes close, except for 'The Fuma Conspiracy' - it's a shame they're not all up to this standard.

    Anyone who enjoys a good adventure yarn which is more about the characters than having a complicated plot would probably enjoy this - think Indiana Jones or James Bond but less violent. It's also a good foil for when you've had enough heavy violence etc.
    Games of Rome : Les jeux de l'Empire

    Games of Rome : Les jeux de l'Empire

    3,5
    1
  • 9 juil. 2006
  • Once I stubbed my toe

    and a small amount of blood coagulated beneath the nail. What has this (perhaps somewhat) gruesome little snippet got to do with Amazons and Gladiators? It's this: that blunted digit was considerably more gory than the 'big' gladiator fight in this film.

    A prolonged close-up of a throat-cutting involved a smear of ketchup on said fool's hand, between thumb and index.

    The camera wobbles and pans around so that you cannot see weapons contacting (read: missing by a mile).

    Swords 'cut' through flesh and bone by passing several inches in front of them and being accompanied by the same cloth ripping sound.

    Is this a serious film? Is it? No, I think this is too heavily influenced by Sesame Street. The fight scenes should have been dropped in favour of can-can dancing, or maybe a Chinese lion dance, it wouldn't have made the film any more ridiculous and may have presented something worth watching. Get those knees up!

    But wait, it doesn't stop there. We have a cast of characters who are just about all as unlikeable, unremarkable and shallow as each other. We have clichés spilling around like claret in a proper gladiator film. We have a combination of Xena and Hercules with all of the (few) good bits ripped out. We have a plot that would be laughed off the side of cereal packets.

    There's plenty of nudity, attractive naked young females draped around the sets. Quite how they managed to make such nymphs SO unappealing and non-sexual is beyond me - it's more interesting to watch the clock.

    The crowd from the 'arena' (possibly assembled and filmed within the director's shed, by the looks of it) acting like the three stooges in smocks. How did they get that many people to look so DENSE and act so annoying within one film? How? I'm giving this painful pile of tosh a 1, because I am extremely hard pressed to find a single good thing to say about it. Well.. some of the weapons and armour looked nice enough, but that isn't going to cut a 2.

    Don't waste your time watching this tripe, seriously. Have a nap for a few hours, read a chapter of a good book, go for a walk, call your mother, heck.. watch Spongebob Squarepants. Just don't say you weren't warned. I will fight lions in the arena armed with a biro before I let anyone submit me to this torture again.
    Gun Survivor 4: Biohazard - Heroes Never Die

    Gun Survivor 4: Biohazard - Heroes Never Die

    5,8
    5
  • 8 mai 2006
  • Throws itself between two stools

    Despite doing nothing horribly wrong, this game is determined to shy away from any chance at greatness as soon as it gets close.

    Think about a well presented luxury liner. Think about zombies and escaped bio-weapons. Think about a horrific control system when it comes to turning your character around. Think stop-start-stop-start-stop-start lightgunning sections mixed with the ability to run in circles. Think typical RE game mechanics, painfully simplified, puzzles removed, tension removed and half-decent characters removed.

    What you're thinking probably resembles this game.

    Whilst many regard it as a brave attempt to mould two genres into a playable game, I can't share their sentiments. The controls are laughable, for a game associated with RE and considering what the RE games were like at the time of this game's release.

    Add in the short completion time, the tired enemy types and the unappealing characters, this really didn't require or deserve the RE tag.

    Those requiring some adrenalin-fueled action will already own games far superior to this, those looking for survival horror may well become quickly annoyed at the shallow gameplay. RE fans might well become drowsy at the re-repeating enemy types.

    As a footnote, those behind this game have obviously got some talent and could create cracking software I'm sure (that's if the actual RE team wasn't behind this in the first place?), but this game would need rebuilding from the ground up to really shine.
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