michaeltomorrow

After hearing about (but not reading) the book I was a little excited for this film. Terrible let down. There is no real plot or even a narrative and I can't for the life of me understand why this gets placed under the Thriller genre. It is little more than a plodding collection of vignettes strung together with an inordinate number of slow-motion flashbacks. Seriously if just the flashbacks and montages were shown in realtime it would cut the runtime of this movie by half. Want to convey a memory of a happy family? Slow motion flashback of them kicking a ball in the yard. Angry family? Slow motion flashback of them yelling and punching. Repeat this over and over to fill the space where plot and character development would go.

The "trial" component feels forced as an unnecessary element (maybe to convince us it's a thriller?). There isn't one relationship in this movie we ever actually care about and, as if to add insult to injury, the star seems to magically reconcile a lifetime of bad choices in the last ten minutes! Too bad this was a really bad vehicle for some otherwise good talent.

Trying to capitalize on its 'Modern Family' success, ABC has crapped out yet another 'blended family' sitcom. Sadly this show suffers from the same mediocrity of all its contenders. In the title role, Malin Ackerman is cast as the sexy, sweet and awkwardly funny third wife. Problem is, she brings none of that to the part. Rapidly approaching 40 she can't pull off kittenish party girl anymore, is written as more naive than sweet, and doesn't have the chops to pull off the physical comedy needed to make this show stand out (Ackerman is also a producer on the show, so maybe no one is able to actually tell her). In fact it almost seems like wife number two, Michaela Watkins' character, is written so ridiculously to help make Ackerman seem more charming by comparison. She doesn't.

Bradley Whitford and Marcia Gay Harden performances' are good, if not predictable, and the kids are...well..kids. Again, not sure what is suppose to be unique about this show. The writing is average, the production is stock and the premise, which I suppose is basically summed up in the title, is hobbled by Ackerman.

A bunch of losers with no movie experience or talent make a film in order to meet girls. That's not the plot...that's what this movie IS. There's only two reasons to sit through a movie like this...boobs and jokes, of which there are none. Well, since I stomached most of the "unrated" version I think I actually saw a couple of boobs....but unless played-out, 1980's Urkle-esque jokes are your thing, there isn't a laugh to be had in the whole movie. There are some great, clever independent films out there with poor production value so I really don't judge on that. But the writing felt like it was done by middle school guys and the acting is almost a parody of itself. Not only isn't it worth seeing, it's not worth reviewing...but I sort of had to since there was one review here that was clearly written by someone associated with them film. No one, and I mean no one, else could find any value in this turkey.