Meurtres à la Saint-Valentin

My Bloody Valentine 3D is one of those really rare kinds of horror flicks. It delivers buckets of gore, brisk pacing, and a lot of in your face 3D goodness. Sit close to the front of your theater for the maximum effect (if you dare!). There is brutality in king size portions, sure to satisfy the most hardcore of horror fans. They really pull out all the stops with that pickaxe's of his.

Perhaps most importantly though, the production and marketing teams were aware of what it what it was. At its core, its a cheesy mindless slasher film, and rather than try to overcome this, My Bloody Valentine acknowledges this trait and works with it. It owns it. Internet ads bore slogans such as 'Its actually 4D if you're wasted.' Never does it get bogged down trying to patch together an airtight story. It just keeps its unrelenting pace up from start to finish, and delivers what the audience came out to see, gratuitous violence.

A film like this is quite refreshing for the genre, not because it is artful by any means, but because it embraces its inherent trashiness. By deliberately failing to take itself seriously, My Bloody Valentine becomes something more than the majority of its peers can ever be. It becomes fun in the same way that a Poison concert or monster truck rally is fun. Take my advice and see this thing as it was meant to be seen, through beer goggles and a pair of cheap 3D glasses. Enjoy it for what it is and don't worry about the second thoughts you might have tomorrow morning.

A movie titled My Bloody Valentine is clearly non trying to pander to art house crowds, nor does it even seem to be reaching for a higher ilk in the horror genre, but while appearing as a fully tacky horror movie entry (a 3-D remake) My Bloody Valentine succeeds in avoiding and ultimately reviving the never ending pitfalls of such films; a strong, unique opening and a surprising and completely plausible, non-ridiculous finale.

Unfortunately the movie is not as strong as its bookend acts, but it is certainly gory, fun, terrifying, tense and nothing but entertaining. (And yes, there is also nudity). The use of the trademark, in your face, 3-D tactics is mostly restrained, although it seems that director Patrick Lussier (who has mostly been in horror movie limbo since he directed Dracula 2000) could not avoid the intermittent pickaxe to the screen. The performances are actually quite strong, and while this is becoming more the norm in horror films, MBV even forgoes the smart-alecky, prankster character which removes the propensity for us to be taken out of the film.

The unique opening is actually a three-tier start. Flashing newsreels reveal that the collapse of the Hanniger Mine in a small town which claimed the lives of 6 miners (Or was it something else that killed the men?). Awakening from a comma years later, the sole survivor of the cave-in, Harry Warden, picks up where he left off, slaying dozens before being killed himself concluding what the town dubbed the Valentines Day Massacre. But all is not what it seems, as 10 years later Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles), a near-victim of Warden, returns to the small town to sell the mine but the killings suspiciously begin once again and it is up to Tom to clear his name.

My Bloody Valentine is a full-fledged throwback to the golden age of slasher films, like Friday the 13th (and is ironically better then the Friday remake this year) and never for a single second tries to be anything it's not and in doing so, it ultimately becomes something it shouldn't be; fun.

6.5 / 10.0

Read all my reviews at: simonsaysmovies.blogspot.com

In the mining town of Harmony, there is an accident caused by the son of the owner Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles) during a drilling, and the mine collapses burying six miners alive. The rescue team finds only Harry Warden alive but in coma and the other miners murdered punched by his pickax, and they conclude that Harry killed them to save oxygen for himself. On the Valentine's Day, Harry awakes from the coma in the local hospital, and he kills twenty-two persons, including a group of teenagers that are partying in the mine. Harry is killed by the deputy but the only survivors are Tom Hanniger, his girlfriend Sarah (Jaime King), their friend Axel Palmer (Kerr Smith) and another girl. Ten years later, Tom returns to Harmony after the death of his father decided to sell the Hanniger Mine, and finds that Sarah has married Axel, now the local sheriff, and they have a son. On the Valentine's Day, Harry Warden also returns seeking revenge against those that had escaped from his pickax in the past, and Tom is accused by Axel and other locals.

The slasher "My Bloody Valentine" is an entertaining collection of clichés that keeps tension until the last scene despite being predictable. The greatest attraction of this forgettable feature seems to be the effects of 3D in movie theaters. I have watched at home on DVD and I had lots of fun with the silly and manipulative plot. My vote is six.

Title (Brazil): "Dia dos Namorados Macabro" ("Macabre Valentine's Day")

Horror is one of my favorite genres. Whether it is serious sophisticated horror, or loud, gory, cheesy horror, I will watch it! My Bloody Valentine is a return to the 80's style slasher genre that is so over-the-top, loud, gory, and extremely entertaining and fun! I expected nothing more and nothing less than a very good 'trashy' film, and that is what I got. The opening credits were very inventive, and from the get-go the film starts off with all the possible gore. The writing and directing are good for what the film is. The acting was not bad, even for a film of this kind. Most were OK, but both Jensen Ackles and Kerr Smith are very talented actors, and are the only ones in the film that actually give very good performances. Kerr Smith is very natural, and Jensen Ackles has always been great in the T.V. cult show, Supernatural, and he portrayed some of those talents here. Although still nothing incredibly special, but for a film like this, I think it is better that way. There are a lot of great chase scenes, and the ending was very good, more than I expected. The end credits were also fabulous. I am one of those who watched it in regular 2-D, so I am expecting even more fun with 3-D! But grab a lot of your friends, have loud stereo sound, and prepare to have a lot of fun! My Bloody Valentine is thrilling, entertaining, and even funny at times. The only recent old-style slasher film, and personally one of my horror faves!

Pretty run of the mill slasher film but one thing it really has going for it that a lot of horror movies don't is that its not as predictable as you might expect it to be and I feel like that kind of plays a big part in why I personally enjoyed it. Cool but cheesy 3D effects, interesting plot. However I will admit one thing I feel like might be a deal breaker for some people is that if you don't like supernatural and have seen the show before, this movie might not be for you. Jensen's character acts a lot like Dean and the whole movie's plot is basically a giant supernatural episode, which if you're like me and like the show you'll definitely like the movie but if you don't this movie might be a turn off.