Madame Web

Based on Madame Web's woeful reviews I was expecting this film to be an utter car crash. To its credit I will say it isn't entirely without merit, but it is incredibly boring and bland.

Mostly this is because nothing particularly happens. It's a superhero movie with little to no superhero action and a painfully long set up for an underwhelming final act. The characters are so underdeveloped that there is no emotional connection or investment in any of them. Everything about the story and writing just feels lazy, vacuous and corny.

Then there's the villain who is utterly uninspiring. He is constantly complaining about 'everything he has built' being destroyed. What has he built you might ask? The film has no interest in exploring this question. He's easily one of the more two dimensional and weak superhero villains I've ever seen committed to screen.

Perhaps the most heinous crime this movie commits is to waste the talents of Dakota Johnson, Sydney Sweeney, Adam Scott, Emma Roberts, Zosia Mamet and more. Such a good cast was assembled and they were given absolutely nothing to work with, so I don't blame the performers. It's just such a shame to see such great talent put to the sword like this.

As if all of this wasn't enough, the movie also feels remarkably low budget and feels excruciatingly long despite its relatively short runtime.

Ultimately I think this film suffered because it was clearly intended as a set up for a wider Spider-Woman franchise which is unlikely to come to fruition. There seemed to be no interest in making a good stand alone movie, and no respect for the audience. A massive waste of time.

I don't understand what the big problem is. Yes, the movie may not be the best superhero movie, but the low ratings aren't justified either. Overall, the story is sometimes told in a rushed manner and the script doesn't deserve an Oscar, but overall the movie was entertaining. To be honest, I was expecting the worst and I was biased because of the negative ratings. After watching the movie, I couldn't understand all the hate for the movie at all. I'm already reasonably discerning when it comes to movies, but guys, let's be honest, this isn't an art house movie, this is popcorn cinema. The movie is supposed to entertain and it did. Even if it was a bit bumpy in places. Overall, I can recommend the movie to people who just want to be entertained. Not more and not less.

I understand what the plan was here. They wanted a trippy film, focusing on a strong future for the Sony verse. The problem is the delivery. The camera work in this movie made it quite irritating to follow, as there was constant quick close up shots of the action. The dialogue was awful, and there was quite a lot of blatant voice over during the villain scenes.

So much wasted time was given to boring scenes in the movie, which led me to believe the screen writers finished the script and realised that it was under the word count.

Honestly the acting quality was quite poor across the board, especially the villain, who honestly seems as if they didn't cast for his role at all, just picked up someone off the side of the road.

For someone who's guilty pleasure is watching bad movies, I it was a painful time. Don't recommend.

Madame Web is the fourth film in Sony's Spider-Man Universe and depicts the origin story of Cassie Webb. The beginning felt awkward, with uninspiring performances from Kerry Bishé as Constance Webb (Cassie Webb's mother) and Tahar Rahim as Ezekiel Sims. The scenes were underwhelming and failed to engage the audience. The narrative then shifts to Cassie Webb's life, 30 years after her birth.

The story revolves around Cassie Webb attempting to save three young women from Ezekiel Sims, who is determined to kill them before they become Spider-Women in the future and ultimately end his life.

The writing could have been significantly better, and the poor editing was a major drawback. The transitions between scenes were jarring and disrupted the flow of the film. Dakota Johnson's performance was decent, and she looked stunning as always. However, Tahar Rahim's lackluster acting and poor dubbing severely impacted the movie's overall quality. Adam Scott and Emma Roberts were underutilized in minimal roles, while Sydney Sweeney, Isabela Merced, and Celeste O'Connor were visually appealing but lacked strong performances.

S. J. Clarkson's direction was mediocre, although a few scenes, such as the chase sequences and train station moments, were executed well.

The background score and VFX were commendable, but overall, the movie failed to deliver a satisfying experience.

Final Rating: 4/10.

It's astonishing to think that Sony could put out a worse product than 2022's Morbius, but boy, "Madame Web" manages it. It is an embarrassing mess. Talented stars wasted on probably one of the worst comic book movie ever (which nobody asked for). Filled with atrocious dialogue, awkward editing and laughable structure. It's a clunky, poorly-written, messy, and sloppy movie packed with some mediocre editing and performances.

The concept is interesting on paper, but it couldn't be saved due to it's terrible execution. "Madame Web" simply lacked the spark it needed in nearly every dept.

There is simply nothing memorable in this movie, except maybe some superhero costumes, but that doesn't redeem the fact that the movie is bad.

So yeah..."Madame Web" is yet another disappointing entry in the Sony's Spider-Less universe. It's like a love letter to an era of superhero films that people largely want to forget. The "Pepsi" adds are stand-out, it falls short of what could have been a decent movie in the hands of someone else twenty years ago.