Vampiyaz

I rented this because the title and box art just screamed "bad movie" and I was not disappointed.

For blood effects, I noticed a wide variety of food products, including strawberry jam, red kool aid, and katsup. Gun shot effects, as the previous user put it, look as though they were made by poking holes through the film. Vampire are people with plastic vampire teeth. This movie looks like it was made with a camcorder, they can't keep the camera from wobbling and it's enough to make you feel sick.

Acting is absolutely horrible. Dialogue probably wasn't scripted, but improved... badly. People screw up their lines and the camera keeps rolling as they repeat them two or three times until they get it right. In dialogue scenes outside where they cut back and forth between two people's faces while they talk, the background noise is different each time and there is a delay before each person talks so you can tell the conversation is segmented.

There is a lot of completely random crap throw in, a guy eating a fly, a guy stirring up a bowl of blood (katsup) with a rubber severed hand and licking the blood (katsup) off the rubber fingers.

There is a Deus ex machina every five minutes. Amulet that makes vampires invincible. Vampire killing task force. The main character is really good at cracking safes, and it just so happens that everyone in town uses the same exact safe.

I can't list everything that was wrong with this film, because the entire film was just a complete disaster. If you love the art of bad film as much as I do, you'll love this one; rent it with friends. No nudity though, which is a shame because there were a couple really cute girls. This was in my top 5 list of the worst movies I've ever seen. I hope they make a sequel.

I cannot even fathom the words to use to describe the exact level of horrificness of this movie. The script could pass for something produced in a 3rd grade class for "special" kids and the plot is about as creative and interesting as the mound of feces my dog dropped off in the yard about an hour ago. Many of the special effects could have been done better in Microsoft Paint....by a blind idiot. I was in awe of such terrible spectacles, such as the guy who kept licking the blood of a plastic hand; the baseball interrogation scene; the lion-roar-esquire sounds the female vampires made; the blue muzzle flash from the guns; the girl in the wheelchair who seemed to just evaporate at the end leaving nothing behind but blood on the wall which was nothing more than water with red food coloring....seriously. But my personal favorite was the extremely awful "bomb" that consisted of a egg timer,a computer printer cable, and a bar of ivory soap.... what the hell? I can only hope that when I am on my death bed, that god gives me an additional 83 minutes of life to make up for the tragic display I had to witness. The creator should be ashamed of himself as he upset Mariah Carey for creating a worse film than Glitter, which in comparison could pass as Citizen Kane. Do yourself, an society a favor and go to your local video store and ask the man (or woman, for this politically correct world) for all the copies of Vampiyaz, then proceed to toss them into a raging inferno, and to never be viewed again by human eyes. But please remember to recycle the plastic melted goo left over, it should have never been used in such a train wreck of a movie. Christ, this movie made me mad, and it's making me mad right now knowing I took the time to write this review. This movie makes suicide seem like a day of fun. Have a nice day.

A Vampire film that really does SUCK!!!

What more can i say? this film looks as though it has been shot by film students with a budget that's less than the price of a big mac! I thought Bones starring Snoop Dogg was bad but this takes it to new limits!

The blood looks like raspberry sauce and the guns they use are BB guns which you actually notice when one of the main characters cock's his gun. The special effects ain't much better they seem to be superimposed on top of the guns used in the film to create muzzle flashes. But what's the point of going to this effort if you can't be bothered to put bullet holes anywhere? To sum it up this film is really bad but if you want to say you've seen possibly the worst film ever then give it a go but I Wouldn't recommend it.

This movie at first seems to be a real stinker. However you have to look at things from another perspective. Consider that all these characters are street people. They are used to certain situations and nothing else. Granted there were somethings that were confusing. Take the guy in the bunny suit. There really needed to be something to explain why he was, and who he was. Also why was the girl walking around on that dirt road? That aside, there were some very good ideas in the film. Such as the Vampire Master becoming a much more cerebral being. Hey you spend 8 years and not able to sleep and you would read a lot too. The hero who just cant seem to catch a break. The "Ghetto Fabulous" Renfield was a scream. I thought the Vampire Assault Team could have used some polish. They seemed disconnected, almost as if they were thrown together and had never done the job before. And for some reason the Team Leader seemed to be immolating Rosie Perez. But if you don't take them seriously, you don't really care. The movie is not about them, Vampiyaz is about a failed thief and a vampire he wants revenge on. The story was tied together nicely and it seemed to try to go for action but fell just short of the mark. The fights were thought out but not well acted.

All in all it was not a BAD movie. It just needs some work in some areas. This was a low budget movie that did the best it could with what was available, or so it seems.

Generally, even in the worst of films, I can find something positive to say - i.e. with 30 Years To Life, it had a good plot, with several unbelievable aspects to it, but it was good overall with decent acting. Like most viewers, I got sucked in by the box art, which promised a Blade-esque Black vampire flick. Well this movie is no Blade. This movie isn't even a *dull* Blade. This is easily one of the worst movies I have seen this year.

The nicest thing I can say about it is that the music was pretty good - generally Hip-Hop soundtracks are limited at best, but the songs fit the movie well. Also, I really *liked* the in-jail sequence early in the movie, although the way it was shot makes it seem the character was only in jail in his mind (or its the world's least populated jail).

Which makes the rest of the movie that much harder to bear. After the decent setup (the two main characters hit-and-run a girl after a botched robbery) the movie goes downhill, with bad special effects (forgivable with good writing/plot - see the Doctor Who TV series), bad writing (the interrogation scene with the baseball being the one exception - small flash of brilliance there!), bad editing (wait is he going up the stairs? down the stairs? Is there a room *on* the stairs, wait, somebody is shooting? What happened to the other guy on the stairs?), inane character actions(he gets the bling and WALKS DOWN THE STREET WITH IT *boggle*), unintentionally comical scenes (when the main vampire gets exposed to sunlight and dam near does the Harlem Shake or the levitating wheelchair scene at the end that should have been very emotional - and *would* have been in a better-written movie), feeble attempts at comic relief (the character that helped the main vampire or the throwaway line about the rap song when the two Vampire-hunter characters are in the car), horribly-shot action scenes (the final blurry, mis-edited fight scene) *sigh*

Look, just avoid this one like the plague. I hope that the filmmakers take the time to study some more action flicks and improve their craft - I saw some good ideas at work in this movie, but they were ruined by really really really faulty execution.