Bad Girls Dormitory

Bad Girls Dormitory is what you get when you put the director of gay porn in charge of a 'Women In Prison' exploitation flick: what is intended to be a gritty slice of sleaze regularly veers into 'camp trash' territory, and the standard of women is average at best, ranging from the downright ugly to the vaguely pretty, with most failing to fill their regulation tight white t-shirts in a satisfactory manner; in contrast, all the men look like gay porn stars, being either buff or blessed with impressive upper-lip facial hair.

Director Tim Kincaid does manage to tick off most of the standard elements one expects from such a film, including a protagonist that doesn't deserve her fate (Carey Zuris as Lori), a cat fight in the mess room, lesbian sex, rape by the more despicable male members of staff, gratuitous shower scenes, a couple of killings, and a riot that allows for a spot of bloody revenge, but his handling of the material is far from great: not one of his cast gives anything remotely resembling a convincing performance; the fight scenes are totally unrealistic; the dialogue is diabolical; and any attempts at pathos are totally botched.

Having said that, it is thanks to Kincaid's lousy film-making skills and his cast's total lack of acting ability—plus loads of hilarious mid-80s trappings—that the film proves to be quite a lot of fun. How could anyone fail to enjoy the drawn out brawl between tough prisoner Rebel (Donna Eskra) and a dyke guard in which neither person lands a convincing punch? Or a disco scene with male visitors dressed like members of Debarge? Or Lisa's stunning (ie. crap) display of grief when she hears of her mother's death? Or... well, the list could go on and on. Suffice to say that if terrible, trashy movies are your thing, you really must see Bad Girls Dormitory.

This film begins in New York City with a couple of female teenagers being sent to a juvenile detention facility for crimes they did not commit. When they get there, they find that the environment is anything but ideal as some of the guards prey upon them to satisfy their sexual appetites. In addition to that, one mentally unstable detainee named "Lisa" (Jennifer Delora) exerting her dominance over most of them due to her fighting prowess and reckless attitude. To make matters even worse, the director of the facility named "Miss Madison" (known only as Marita) deliberately looks the other which, in turn, makes things even worse. What nobody counts on, however, is one particular detainee named "Lori" (Carey Zuris) who refused to be abused any further. Now, rather than reveal any more, I will just say that this was a cheap women-in-prison film which relies upon scenes of either a violent or sexual nature. The problem, however, is that none of these scenes were really that impressive or interesting. At least, I didn't think so. Be that as it may, while I don't consider this to be a terrible movie necessarily, I honestly cannot rate it any higher than I have.

This opens with a trio of set-up-but-innocent girls getting arrested and shipped off to the titular facility. The place is run by Miss Madison, who wants to do some experimental reconditioning techniques on her charges and social worker Don Beach (Rick Gianasi) is concerned. Lori (Carey Zuris) emerges as our leading character and, naturally, there are tough chick adversaries in the form of Lisa (Jennifer Delora) and her sidekick Rebel (Donna Eskra). And, even more naturally, Lori and Don hook up.

If you want some 80s NYC sleaze, you can't go wrong with this. Sporting a lo-fi BASKET CASE aesthetic, BAD GIRL'S DORMITORY is rife with dirty NYC alleys, grimy apartment buildings, and basements with peeling paint. I love it. The acting is universally bad but lead Zuris, who looks a bit like Marilyn Chambers, is actually decent. She didn't do anything else. I'd also give Delora points for her tough chick portrayal (she is interviewed on the Media Blasters DVD). Special mention should be made for the obviously pseudonym donning Marita as the warden Miss Madison. Looking like a porn variation of Bridgette Nielsen in ROCKY IV, she is hilariously bad and her bizarre accent makes me suspect she may be Angelika Jager (another pseudonym?) from Kincaid's ROBOT HOLOCAUST (1986). Given how awful Jager was and the proximity of the two productions, they must be the same lady.

I am female and I liked this film, it was one of those that my parents rented out and hid in the usual place at the back of the wardrobe, my best mate and I found it one day when rummaging. 80's cheesy music is my thing, and I can't get the 'Hose Me Down' song out of my head. PLease put it on a CD, it isn't on any Man Parrish CDs. If anyone does know of a CD or vinyl with this track on, please put me out of my misery and let me know where I can get my grubby mitts on it. Please do a soundtrack for this film.

It goes something like this; "HOw much love is gonna bring you round, I'm heating up so won't you hose me down....just come to me and don't you make a sound...the time is right to fool around so hose me down".

Thats about all I can remember

Entertainingly inept low budget sleaze set in the title place, with a series of sordid episodes on the way to the climactic action. The inmates are at the mercy of corrupt, leering, creepy staff, and among the story threads there's a girl who gives birth, our lead is raped by one of the guards, and there are assorted fights that go on. This melodramatic trash is brought to us by writer / director Tim Kincaid, who stresses the actresses' assets every chance he gets. Fans of "babes behind bars" cinema will be pleased to note the number of shower scenes. The acting, not surprisingly, is largely of the so-bad-it's-hilarious variety, with some choice dialogue along the way. Dan Barclay is particularly funny as Dr. DeMarco, what with his delivery. The accent of co-star Marita as strict warden Miss Madison definitely adds to the fun factor. Carey Zuris is sincere as principal character Lori, as is Natalie O'Connell as the naive Paige; Jennifer Delora and Donna Eskra are amusing as bad gals Lisa and Rebel, and Rick Gianasi is a hoot as nice guy guard Don Beach. The editing is choppy, and the pacing quite leisurely. It's clear Kincaid has padded this out as much as possible. The impossibly protracted dance sequence is proof of this; it goes on so long it's a riot. The look is very grungy all the way through thanks to the cinematography of Arthur D. Marks, and the non-stop pop / rock score composed by Man Parrish helps to enliven some scenes. Edward French supplies the gore, which greatly assists in the enjoyment of this scuzzy little flick. The fight scenes are awkwardly staged, and the action never too invigorating, but it's hard to deny the clunky charm of the film, which certainly does have its heart in the right depraved place. Seven out of 10.