Starcrash : Le Choc des étoiles

Starcrash is a movie that gets its name from... the very last few minutes of the film, where the name is casually dropped in a conversation, never to be uttered again or its origin explained. The entire plot is Caroline Munro running around in a bathing suit and having completely inappropriate facial expressions. The rest is chaos: a villain taken straight from children's stories, a benevolent emperor played by Christopher Plummer and his son: David Hasselhoff, a mysterious companion who is basically the Deus ex Machina needed to resolve some scenes and a robot with an American South accent that gleefully declares his chauvinism, regardless of him not having a nation or a gender. The acting is so bad it's hilarious, the effects are so special that psychiatric wards come to mind. All in all, ridiculous at all levels.

Some people say it is a ripoff of Star Wars, but I don't see it. There is no story to talk of. The only commonality seems to be a lightsaber that ... just is, with no explanation. I would like to say that Caroline is so sexy that watching the movie is worth it, but really, if you are not drunk out of your mind you can't possibly enjoy this film at its true potential. Just saying.

In the same vein as Jason of Star Command and Flesh Gordon, Starcrash is a campy, fun throwback to the old serials of the 30s and 40s. It looks, feels, and tastes like an old serial, minus the chapters. Yep, it is a cheesey attempt to cash in on the great sci-fi craze of the late 70s, fueled by the likes of syndicated Star Trek reruns, Logan's Run, Close Encounters, Space: 1999, and ESPECIALLY Star Wars, of course. It is guilty as charged. That said, it is an absoloute low-budget blast. For detractors, here's your first clue that this film is not to be taken seriously: A robot with a long, southern drawl. L the cowardly robot is a riot!

Starcrash shamelessly pilfers elements from Invaders from Mars (1953) (a brief appearance by an alien judicial judge), Ray Harryhausen films (a couple of model animated aliens & robots), and Star Wars (a lightsaber duel), not to mention the old serials.

The whole thing never stops to catch its breath, and neither does the viewer, overwhelmed by alternately cheesey and surprisingly good special fx and generally porn-level acting and dialogue. One minute Stella and L are battling Amazons, the next L is gunning it out with troglodytes, and the next Akton is having a lightsaber duel with those model-animated robots. There are psychadelic images and scenes, almost worthy of the equally bizarre Barbarella. And along the way are allusions to classic sf authors Edmond Hamilton, Murray Leinster, and Ray Bradbury.

For the b-movie or old time serial lover, or someone who doesn't mind some campy lightweight space opera, Starcrash really can't be topped.

When "Star Crash" appeared in the U.S., my local newspaper's film critic noted: "...You have to be suspicious of a movie that literally sneaks into town...". That remark left me curious, but not curious enough; after just one week "Star Crash" had left town as quietly as it had come in. Why would any movie get so little push from its' distributor, I wondered? Could it really be that bad? It took me years to find out. Some dozen or so years later, a friend of mine told me he had a copy...well, I couldn't pass this up. After seeing it, I decided that the critics were right--and wrong. Such a hoot! Caroline Munro definitely set the mood in her almost-not-there "space-kini" and high-heeled boots, with Marjoe Gortner pulling backup as 2nd banana. Cheesy special FX, a painfully earnest performance by Christopher Plummer (you can practically see him wondering if his paycheck will clear the bank when he's finished), and a surprisingly good score ( hey, it's John Barry, what did you expect?)make this a pleasant surprise, as long as you're not expecting anything on par with E.E. "Doc" Smith, etc. A small note: I got to meet Ms. Munro at an SF convention back in '82, and I totally agree with Harlan Ellison...she was so gorgeous in person that "they had to ugly her down, so that the cameras wouldn't melt during filming!"....Though I forgot to ask her if it was true that only copy of the shooting script had been stolen by members of Italy's Red Brigade terrorists and held for ransom! Ah, rumors...anyway, try and catch it for free and you won't feel cheated.

Sometimes i think i like this even more than i like Star Wars.

First it´s got a great soundtrack by John Barry. In fact this soundtrack is so good that he even riped-off from himself, and we can hear a slight diferent version in OUT OF AFRICA, but not much diferent as it is instantly recognizable as the music from STARCRASH, from everyone who loves this italian mega-low budget space opera thing.

Anyway, STARCRASH has something very special to me that i still can´t figure it out to this day.

Even with its cardboard sets, spaceship models ridiculous costumes and clothes, ultra bad dialogue and crapy special effects which in fact are not even effects,much less special, STARCRASH is still one of my all time favorites space movies.

Idiotic villains, half naked space babes, a robbot named HAL with the personality of C-3PO (!!!?), light sabres duels and lots space battles, this movie has it all !

It even has a giant battlestation, with glass windows, vitral style, which are shattered by the good guys when they invade the station inside missile capsules who break all the windows in the final battle. And even with the glass broken nothing happens, no decompression, no air being sucked out into space, nothing ! It´s hilarious. Classic moment in Bad movies no doubt.

Man! Even DAVID HASSELHOF is in this ! A long, long time ago in a galaxy very far away from BAYWATCH. Altough the character of STELLA STAR has everything to be in Baywatch.

I recomend this movie to everybody, who loves Bad movies and particulary if you love science fiction. This is more fun than Star Wars ! :-)

What´s great about STARCRASH is that it doesn´t try to be more than what actualy is, a great bad movie. Even the actors seem to be having fun in this ! Or maybe they´re just desperated to get out of it. :-)

But it works, and it works great.

It´s fun to watch, it has a good 30´s classical plot for space opera story, it is very atmospheric and the soundtrack is beautiful.

Even the sound effects are cool, with very strange eletronic blips and noises, that reminds me of those 50´s invasion movies sometimes.

I guess there is nothing more i can say.

STARCRASH is one of those movies that you either love or hate with all your guts !

I love it.

Just don´t look at this as a serious film, and you´ll have fun for sure watching it. Brilliant stuff !

I've been a fan of this movie for many years,a friend who used to work in a video shop told me of it,he said it was just like Star Wars ! He was both right and wrong in the same breath.It is a Star Wars inspired movie,but also borrows heavily from Barbarella,Flash Gordon etc... As to it being as good as the original...no way ! It is however better than the 2 prequels and was probably the same price for the whole movie as their catering costs ! If you've not seen it...do so now !