Ishtar

I know it's not the best. Arsenic and Old Lace is the top comedy of all time. Citizen Kane the greatest film. Gone with the Wind the greatest epic.

Wizard of Oz the finest fantasy. And L.O.T.R. 1,2,3 trilogy is the ultimate film legend.

But for me, Ishtar is pure fun. I saw it when it came out. Bought the video. Watch it twice a year and have my daughter hooked on it too.

It's the Vinyl Cafe /Dave and Morley type of humour that gets me. I can't hold a tune with a forklift and I find the singing style and lyrics of Rogers and Clark inspirational.

I feel for these guys. The Warren Beatty line to Dustin Hoffman " You'd rather have nothing, than settle for less. " reminds me of my own ( self-deprecating ) personal credo, 'Lower your standards and achieve! "

These innocents are taken on a journey of discovery through Ishtar and back home to the struggle against 'lives of quiet desperation.'

There is so much talent involved in this movie, what happened? The cast and crew have a combined lifetime 61 Oscar nominations and 16 wins. How could this not be a better movie? It is well produced, the cinematography and costumes are fine and well done. The main flaws are the poorly written screenplay, the paper thin plot and the lack of spark from the main stars. It's not without some funny moments, but they are too scarce. The humor wears thin in less than an hour and it becomes a challenge to stay interested in the plot. The lovely Isabelle Adjani is wasted. Charles Grodin does score in a supporting role and outshines the rest of the cast.

OK, Warren was on Dave Letterman. He says to Dave: "I still think Ishtar was funny. I don't get it. Why is this movie considered a bomb?" We liked it! OK, so the sled was "rosebud", but we still give this movie a Siskel-Ebert like thumbs up. Oops, Siskel passed away. Well, you know? Thumbs up to Warren and Dustin. Ishtar is funny. Warren is right. He is a highly intelligent guy, after all. So, we concur that to view Ishtar as a "bomb" represents a serious perception-gap on the part of critics and the general movie public. We call for the production of "Ishtar II"! YEAH!

I am just old enough to remember the two movies of the same approximate era (1980s, anyway) that became synonymous with big-budget box office bombs: "Ishtar" and "Heaven's Gate."

At the time, "Ishtar" was considered so bad as to be unwatchable. It was skewered and vilified so strongly that the critics rapidly drove it out of the theaters. Few--including me--ever had the nerve to rent the movie.

It wasn't until roughly 10 years after its release that my in-laws introduced me to the comedic greatness that is "Ishtar." To this day when I tell friends and family that I love Ishtar, it is somewhat like saying, enthusiastically, "Hey, I just contracted leprosy!" Such is the stigma that still lingers with this film.

To the credit of critics, this is by no means a work of pure comedic genius.

The movie has essentially one theme that works--the effortless cluelessness of Lyle and Chuck as the world's worst songwriters--and this is exhausted almost completely within the first 30 minutes. Still, it is a totally knee-slapping hilarious 30 minutes. The meandering remaining plot that takes them to Morocco for a singing gig and leads them to become CIA "agents" is what cemented the bad taste in the mouth of critics for time immemorial. This theme by the end of the movie is rather re-treaded and worn-out. We kind of want Warren and Dustin to just shut up by then.

This second act suffers from a kind of Hope-Crosby wannabee syndrome, and the writing isn't up to the slapstick pedigree the movie had begun revealing quite hilariously in the first act. Considering this film came from the pen of Elaine May--of "Nichols and May" comedy duet fame--I would have expected more, but perhaps this movie spiraled out of her hands because of the oft-misunderstood first act. I could easily see studio test audiences handily rejecting it and thus twisting the movie's priorities out of whack.

Still, "Ishtar" shouldn't be brushed aside as a mere footnote in movie history. It is worth watching for its true hilarity and the performances of both Hoffman and Beatty.

If ISHTAR had starred Steve Martin and Chevy Chase, been directed by John Landis and shot for $10 million on a Hollywood sound stage, I think people would have enjoyed it for what it is, a sophomoric, silly road movie.

However, it stars Warren Beatty and Dustin Hoffman, and was directed by Elaine May, a trio of actors and filmmakers who were known for comedy classics as HEAVEN CAN WAIT, THE HEARTBREAK KID and TOOTSIE. Therefore, people expecting to see the most brilliant American comedy of all time were shocked and appalled when, instead, they got a glorified Cheech and Chong movie.

Is this fair? Yes and no. ISHTAR definitely falls flat at times. There are some curiously lifeless moments and awkward scenes that reek of last minute re-editing. The movie is far from perfect. But it is often very funny, and features two terrific, underrated performances from Beatty and Hoffman.

Watching Beatty play such a well meaning dim-wit is a real treat. And Hoffman is just as good playing an equally dense, overly self-assured jerk. Elaine May and Paul William's intentionally awful songs are hilarious as well. People who criticize the quality of the songs or Beatty and Hoffman's vocal talent are obviously missing the joke, as both are SUPPOSED to be bad.

A pre-obnoxiously conservative Charles Grodin adds plenty of laughs as a CIA agent, while Isabelle Adjani does well in a deceptively complex role, which requires her to play it totally straight while engaged in completely ludicrous scenes with Beatty and Hoffman.

Beatty and Hoffman's interaction while trapped in the desert is classic. One of the movie's funniest moments involves the wind kicking up after they have been told by Adjani that "there is no wind in the desert". Hoffman asks, "Is the wind blowing?" Beatty answers, "This must be one of those once in a lifetime things, like the glaciers melting." If you don't find that funny, you'll hate this movie.

But if dry, silly humor is your cup of tea, and you can view a movie without being overly distracted by it's star power, then you just might enjoy ISHTAR. It doesn't always work, but I found it to be pretty funny, with a fair amount of really great laughs. Considering the barrage of moronic, unfunny Hollywood comedies that have come and gone in it's wake, ISHTAR should be considered a triumph.