Planet of Dinosaurs

A spaceship in some unspecified future where human beings are equipped for space travel and have laser guns for weapons, crash lands on a strange young planet where dinosaurs are coincidentally also evolved and only on this world, have not gone extinct...yet. The survivors of the crash, roughly ten bland characters wearing blue, white, and yellow suits, fight for survival against the alien prehistoric monsters.

"Planet of the Dinosaurs" is a peculiar movie. Like I said in my summary above, the stop-motion animated dinosaurs in the film are the only colorful actors. The models are crude, but effectively animated. And they are much more fascinating and intriguing than these characters portrayed by inexperienced actors and speaking lines from a script that must have been written overnight without a single revision. Obviously, most of the budget was put into the dinosaurs, and although there is a fair share of them, there's not nearly enough to save us from our boredom. These human characters are only there to scream, run around, and mutter these poorly-written and verbose speeches about survival. And unfortunately, not nearly enough of them get eaten by the dinosaurs.

Overall, "Planet of the Dinosaurs" is not a film I plan on seeing again. Some people will simply love it for being so cheap and so poorly made. Sometimes, I enjoy movies like this. But this particular film is just too long, too boring, and very exhausting on the mind.

Planet of Dinosaurs is an ultra cheesy camp sci-fi tale that leaves a lot to be desired.

It tells the story of a spaceship (With oddly skeletal crew) which crash lands on a planet filled with dinosaurs. They must seek shelter, food and safety and figure out their next move.

With sfx that are bad even for the day, they look like plastic childrens toys used for stop motion animation. The performances are generic, the cinematography is lifeless and the thing doesn't scream B-movie it screams D and that's perhaps me being kind.

When dinosaurs are on screen it's cringe inducing, when they aren't it's incredibly boring. Ugly, lifeless mess.

The Good:

Concept isn't terrible

The Bad:

Looks hideous

Criminally boring in places

Things I Learnt From This Movie:

Moustaches were a legal requirement in the 1970's

Space outfits in the 70's for women looked like they should have a Hooters logo on them

If you have people rooting for the dinosaurs, you've ballsed up

They didn't have the budget to get that one guy a shirt

Remember the first 40 minutes of the original "Planet of the Apes" in which the surviving team of a spacecraft explore the desert-like environment of the mysterious planet wherein they crash? (It was the best part of the movie, except for the very end). Okay, imagine that scenario for an entire 84 minute flick, albeit WITHOUT notable actors, great soundtrack and first-rate filmmaking; not to mention replace the apes with dinosaurs. If you can picture that, and it sounds like your cup of java, you might want to pick up "Planet of the Dinosaurs."

This film is so amateurishly done on most levels that the average person would likely rate it pretty low. I grant it 5/10 Stars, however, for five reasons:

• The picture was filmed at Vasquez Rocks, Northeast of Los Angeles (I visited this park in July of 2003). If you're not in the know, this location is where many of the original Star Trek episodes where filmed, such as "Arena" wherein Captain Kirk fights the Lizardman.

• The stop-motion dinosaur animation is very good for the time period and, I hear, won some kind of an award when the film was released in the late '70s. It's pretty much on a par with "One Million Years B.C."

• There are four (count 'em, four) female survivors of the space wreck and two of them are babes (the other two aren't that bad either, that is, if you're stranded on a deserted planet). One beauty unfortunately gets eaten almost immediately, but the other survives for quite awhile. The latter, by the way, appears to be of Native American ancestry and her tight outfit shows off her midrift and bellybutton the entire stint she appears in the film. And, trust me, if you have any doubt that American Indian women can be truly beautiful, you need to see this fine piece of womanhood.

• After the first 20-30 minutes I was able to mentally adjust and accept the film's limitations; I strangely started to get into the story at this point and even care about the characters.

• Lastly, this is definitely not a kiddy flick, nor is it goofy, comedic or even campy. It's a serious sci-fi story.

If "Planet of the Dinosaurs" had better actors, sound, music and worked out various other kinks in the story, direction, etc. I would give it a higher rating.

BOTTOM LINE: It's worth picking up if (like me) you're a sucker for Sci-fi survival-on-deserted-planet type flicks. Just keep in mind it's strictly Grade Z and mental adjustments will have to be made to appreciate it.

"Planet of the Dinosaurs" has garnered a worthy "guilty pleasure" spot in the cult/independent film section of my video library.

GRADE: C+

First of all, this movie is awful - not good awful, worse, mediocre awful. Somewhere in California in the mid '70's someone was stoned and watched Planter of Apes and One Million Years BC one night and thought, Dude, I've got an idea for a movie!

Ah the 1970's where every man had a beard or mustache, space uniforms were tight polyester and Rule #1 was no one could look look dirty despite falling, running, etc.

I'm guessing they filmed the movie in days without ever doing a retake or, at the very least, only 1 retake was allowed per shot. Good enough was the mantra.

The Dinosaur stop motion was passable given the budget and direction.

Honestly this moving screams TV movie w/o any of the B or C List actors involved. Maybe the guy who was stoned when coming up with this movie had the right idea, watch with "help"

A spaceship crashes on a planet inhabited by dinosaurs and the (young, attractive, and scantily-dressed) crew struggles to stay alive. The special effects (the stop-motion dinosaurs) surprisingly good, for a low budget film. One by one members of the crew get eaten by carnivores, and you never know which one will be next. The debates amongst the crew members about various survival strategies are actually fairly reasonable, if you can get past the bad acting.

If you want to hear it with comedy riffs, get the "Rifftrax" version.