Flash Gordon

During the middle section of this movie, our hero 'Flash' Gordon, accompanied by Ornella "Most beautiful woman in the world" Muti, witnesses ex Bond Timothy Dalton giving ex Blue Peter presenter Peter Duncan the sweet merciful release of death by putting him to the(cardboard) sword (offscreen). "Its an initiation" purrs the shapely Muti, "I just love initiations".

This 1980 version of the perennial Saturday morning sci-fi cliffhanger is a feast for the senses. That is, if your senses crave lashings of junkfood. With an eye meltingly lurid palette of colours and rocktastic Queen soundtrack Flash Gordon was the perfectly overblown movie for the start of an overblown decade. The costumes are extravagantly cheesy, the effects farcical, the acting hilarious.

Almost every minor character was hammed up to perfection by the cream (or perhaps custard) of character actors of the time including such luminaries as Rocky Horrors Richard O Brien, Phillip "I corrected them" Stone from the Shining and the half-man, half-beast that is Brian Blessed.

The only minor flaw in this popcorn delight is the fact that it is, in almost every way - a terrible, awful movie - I HIGHLY recommend it.

Some childhood obsessions stay with you for life, and Flash would have to be one of them. In fact, Flash Gordon, Star Wars, and Battlestar Galactica began a lifelong obsession with science fiction and fantasy in all of its good (and especially) bad forms. The above summary isn't really accurate; 20 years don't make a difference to how much I like this film, but they have changed my reasons for liking it. With hindsight, I've discovered exactly who Lorenzo Semple Jr. is, and now, fully understanding the camp elements of this film, I can still enjoy it, but on a completely new level. As for complaints about the acting of Sam Jones (who did much worse in the abysmal firefighter series Code Red) and Melody Anderson, you hire actors for what they can do, not what they can't. This is why Keanu Reeves was perfect for The Matrix, and why Arnold Schwarzenegger was perfect for The Terminator. Jones and Anderson serve the same purpose for Semple as Adam West and Burt Ward did in the Batman series; who better than someone sadly lacking in acting skills to deliver a completely ludicrous line with a straight face? Unless your name is Charlton Heston, experienced actors have a difficult time with it. Anyways, I digress. The things that first attracted me to this film still do it for me, and that would be the production values and special effects, not to mention the great soundtrack by Queen (I actually had a friend consider using Brian May's arrangement of the Wedding March at his wedding; his mother, of course, ixnayed it). This is still a great looking movie, even by today's standards, which makes me wonder if DeLaurentiis was in on the joke the whole time. All in all, a lot of fun, unless you get offended by less than faithful revisions, in which case I have to wonder about your upbringing.

Colorful, silly fun, at times campy, Mike Hodges's 1980 "Flash Gordon" is among those movies that are less than the sum of their parts. Made on shoe-string budgets with C-picture performers and crew for young undemanding viewers, the original 1930's Flash Gordon serials are unintentionally funny to adults today. To recapture the innocence and naivete of those movies with a big budget and trained actors is a difficult task, although Hodges's "Flash Gordon" makes a decent attempt. Lorenzo Semple's screenplay tracks the original serials fairly well; Flash and Dale Arden are taken aboard Doctor Hans Zarkov's spacecraft and flown to the planet Mongo, where they battle Emperor Ming the Merciless to save the Earth. Semple's script has enough classic bad dialog to satisfy seekers of camp; "I love you Flash, but we only have 14 hours to save the Earth." However, the difference between Semple's script and the original series is that Semple knew he was writing bad dialog, while the writers of the serial were unintentionally hilarious.

That difference in intention also applies to the actors; Buster Crabbe and company played the serials dead-pan straight, and those in the remake who play their parts equally straight come off best. The under-demanding role of Flash requires the skills of a Razzie Award Winning thespian, and, Sam J. Jones won a Razzie nomination for his work herein. Although not a super hero in the modern sense, the blonde hunk, who sports nothing but leather trunks in one scene, physically fills the role, and Jones manages to deliver his lines with a convincing lack of conviction as the dim, but well meaning Flash. However, the movie's scene-stealer is Max Von Sydow as Ming the Merciless; appropriately garbed and made-up as the evil emperor, Von Sydow plays the role with majesty and menace, which is all the more fun. Unfortunately, Topol as Doctor Zarkov, does not follow Von Sydow's example and winks and smiles as the mad scientist, telegraphing to viewers that he is in on the joke. But Brian Blessed as the winged Prince Vultan, Timothy Dalton as Prince Barin, and, especially, the delicious Peter Wyngarde as Klytus deliver their lines as though penned by the Bard himself. Although Mariangela Melato is a memorable Kala, Melody Anderson as Dale Arden should have been in the running for a Razzie alongside Jones, which is intended as a compliment.

Besides Von Sydow, the film's other scene-stealer is designer Danilo Donati, who provided the lavish Fellini-esque costumes and sets. While Donati's work tends to emphasize red and gold, which may not be to everyone's taste, his outlandish designs are as entertaining as anything on display and certainly light years beyond those of the 1930's serials. If Donati or another anonymous designer created the Art-Deco spaceships, he or she too deserves kudos as do the creators of the appropriately tacky and obvious special effects, which beautifully evoke the primitive work of the 1930's serials. As contemporary and important as the art direction is the pulsating score by Queen that punctuates the action and enhances the excitement. While "Flash Gordon" is not the high camp perhaps intended, the film has a cult following and enough outstanding attributes to satisfy main-stream audiences. Led by Max Von Sydow's iconic Ming the Merciless, Queen's pounding music, and Danilo Donati's dazzling designs, "Flash Gordon" may not be to everybody's taste, but should be savored by all at least once, just for the sheer fun of it all.

The Emperor Ming (Max von Sydow) is attacking the Earth. Only former NASA scientist Dr. Hans Zarkov (Topol) seems to have foreseen it. He intends to launch himself in his rocket as a 'counter-attack'. NY Jets star quarterback Flash Gordon (Sam J. Jones) is taking a commuter flight. He survives the plane crash along with fellow passenger Dale Arden (Melody Anderson). Zarkov tricks the duo into his rocket and launches them into space. They are taken prisoner to find Ming's tyrannical rule over the various kingdoms. Prince Barin (Timothy Dalton) leads the kingdom of Arboria. Hawkman Prince Vultan (Brian Blessed) runs Sky City. Ming's daughter Princess Aura (Ornella Muti) is fascinated with Flash. Ming takes Dale as his concubine.

This is brilliantly colorful and deliciously campy. The Queen soundtrack is second to none. The acting is big but it fits the style. Parts of it goes a bit too slowly. Some scenes are very static. Even the actors move slowly as an old-fashion way to denote drama. Sometimes it needs more energy to maintain the tension. This is an unique vision and a fun watch if you don't take it seriously.

American football star Flash Gordon (Sam Jones), scientist Hans Zarkov (Topol), and pretty estate agent Dale Arden (Melody Anderson) are blasted to the farthest reaches of space to fight Ming the Merciless (Max Von Sydow), the tyrannical ruler of Mongo, who has been subjecting The Earth to a series of violent attacks in the form of freak weather conditions and terrible catastrophes.

Featuring blond pretty boy Sam Jones in the title role, some of the most garish costumes in the history of cinema, cheesy dialogue galore, a catchy pop/rock soundtrack by Queen, poorly constructed props (and a few rather suggestive looking ones), marvellously hammy performances from a fine collection of cult character actors (including Department S's Richard Wyngarde, Rocky Horror's Richard O'Brien and good old Brian Blessed), and spectacularly ropey special effects (all wires clearly visible), Flash Gordon is quite possibly the most gleefully daft, over-the-top, knowingly tacky, and outrageously flamboyant sci-fi film ever made.

Don't be put off by the fact that the film is perfect for a themed night at the local gay bar, though—Flash Gordon might be camper than a row of tents, as the saying goes, but there really is something for everyone but the most joyless of movie pedants: we get fantastical floating worlds that predate those in Avatar by three decades, there's pet dwarfs, crazy laser battles, a whip-wielding dominatrix, assorted sexy bints in skimpy outfits, and even a little 'gore' (both Ming and his henchman Klytus meet nasty fates)—PLUS for every shot of our hero in a tight T-shirt or leather hot-pants, we get several of the gorgeous Ornella Muti (as Ming's sultry daughter Princess Aura) in her figure hugging red catsuit, easily rivalling Buck Rogers' Erin Gray in the sexy Spandex stakes. Melody Anderson as Dale isn't exactly ugly either, and also gets to wear some very revealing get-ups.

Hell, even Blue Peter fans are catered for, with '80s presenter Peter Duncan appearing as a tree dweller whose hand is attacked by a slimy vacuum cleaner bag with a poisonous sting in its tail. Now that's what I call entertainment!