Das grenzt an Liebe

Just watched this with my mom on a Netflix disc. We both enjoyed this mostly leisurely humorous look at a couple of older leads-Michael Douglas and Diane Keaton-coping with the loss of their spouses while also dealing with one selling his former home as a realtor (Douglas), one trying to not get too depressed while performing songs on stage (Keaton), and both dealing with a young girl-Douglas' son's offspring whose father is about to go to jail for a crime he didn't commit-staying in the grassy retreat neighborhood they live next door in. I'll just now say this was quite humorous and touching if not hilarious or too dramatic. Director Rob Reiner gives a nice measured pace throughout and appears himself as Keaton's pianist accompanist with an obvious bad hair job! I also liked Frances Sternhagen as Michael's fellow real estate work mate, and that girl played by Sterling Jerins. So on that note, And So It Goes is worth a look.

I have enjoyed Keaton and Douglas for years - I'm not that far behind them in the birthdays I've celebrated. And this movie is no exception. My wife and I found wonderful texture in the use of minor plot points to enhance the larger story. For instance - the stray dog which at first is disliked and then accepted...the metaphor of caterpillar and butterfly. It was all very nicely done in a story that evolved at a leisurely pace and with the layers one would expect in a life. As person expecting to see fewer years than I have already seen I appreciate films that reflect some of what I have experienced - and some of which I wish I had experienced. Movies such as these remind us, also, of the value of looking ahead to what life can hold no matter the number of years that have crinkled your brows.

Hey it's a Rob Reiner movie, what could possibly go wrong? Not too much, but he's coasting here, and even indulging himself with a minor role. It's not terrible but it is derivative, with Keaton doing her adorable kooky self and Douglas his mean mother routine, concealing a heart of gold. Echoes of Bill Murray in St Vincent with his child-phobia or Nicholson in As Good As it Gets with his misogyny, they inevitably get together and it all ends in a pretty saccharine love-in. Lots of ethnic minority casting and an adorable kid, you'll either surrender to its charms or reach for the sick bag.

The story itself is pretty simple. The characters are kind of simple too (at least the one played by Michael Douglas). But the way they play (off each other), is phenomenal. There is something to the actors, which we know they are able to charm us and that they have the ability to take things to another level. And that is what they are doing here, elevating the movie itself.

There have been a couple of movies, where the main character is unlikeable at first. And this "method" makes sense, but only if a really strong actor is playing that role. Some things might go a bit too smooth, but overall you know where this is going. It's a nice movie, with overall good acting and superb acting by our two leads.

And So It Goes is a gentle comedy about the fragility of being human. Rob Reiner, its director, suggests that in the eternal presence of youth, it is possible to continue to grow young and transform one's life. Although its main characters, Leah, a widow who sings torch songs in supper clubs but can't get through one without crying (Diane Keaton) and Oren, a widower and veteran Realtor who is just counting the days until retirement (Michael Douglas), are at odds with each other. In the course of events we find opposites attract and are vital to one another's growth. Both are still actively grieving their deceased spouses in very different ways. Oren slips away to the graveyard to talk to his wife, while showing the world a nasty, hardened face. His dream of retirement hinges upon the final sale of the $8.6 million mansion where he lived with her once upon a time. Should the sale go through, he intends to head for the serenity of a solitary life tucked away in Vermont. In the mean time, he must weather the storm of living among others in the cramped quarters of a multiple family dwelling he owns and sardonically nicknames "Shangri-La." Although both Leah and Oren are in fragile shape, they unify when Oren's ten year-old grand daughter is dumped on his doorstep by his son, a man estranged from his father for double digits who is going away to prison. Oren attempts to get rid of the child, but Leah steps in, revealing her material instincts in full bloom. Her "perfect love" with her deceased husband did not enable her to become a mother and this is her opportunity. The vulnerability of Oren's young grand daughter, who his keenly aware that she has been dumped in the hands of an aging, unhappy man who does not want her, is beautifully and delicately rendered.

In their struggle to deal with the child, Oren is humbled by Leah's superb ability to cope and begins to grow fond of both Leah and his grand daughter. In spite of his crude behavior toward his neighbors/tenants in the past, love enters the humble community at "Shangri-La" in the form of the arrival of a ten year old, the adoption of a stray dog, the sudden birth of a baby and the transformation of caterpillar into...a butterfly. This happiness is a metaphor for the potential happiness hidden in even the most banal settings and social situations. Only when events conspire to reveal the more elevated nature in people can both young and old face what the future has in store for them--something that is always a question mark.

And So It Goes is a far more realistic and beautiful love story than the blockbuster hit that Diane Keaton made with Jack Nicholson, As Good As It Gets, over a decade ago. It is not a movie about "beautiful people" living in spotless white houses in the Hamptons or middle aged divorcées who manage snag aging, jaded producers so rich they date twenty year-old girls. That film was a complete fantasy on every level. (Without Keanu Reeves for visual relief it would have been hard to take some of the love scenes.) And So It Goes is a far gentler, far less glamorous film about love "among the ruins" than As Good As It Gets. Its verisimilitude may make less mature audiences uncomfortable for that reason. Ultimately, Keaton and Douglas pull off their roles like the pros that they are. It's a pleasure to see them get to know one another gradually, albeit clumsily and foolishly, in a way that is true to life. I highly recommend And So It Goes for anyone brave enough to watch fragile people still attempting to transform their lives and move forward in the face of the unknown.