Swearnet

Even though this is NOT a Trailer Park Boys movie it IS a Trailer Park Boys movie. The 3 stars of the cult favourite TV series and many of the supporting cast members play "themselves" in this movie about setting up their own TV network so that they won't have to put up with any more censorship. Apparently they REALLY like swearing!

The boys kind of play the same characters that they do in the TPB series but with some differences. For instance "Mike Smith" is a violent, drug and booze fuelled party monster. Pretty much the polar opposite to Bubbles. John Dunsworth shows absolutely nothing of Jim Lahey. Pat Roach is a real hoot as Swearman although "Dickman" might be a more accurate name. He has a pretty good sized role in this and does a good job. Tom Green and Carrot Top are kind of blah in their parts. Tom has an obsession with handing out key-chains and Carrot Top kind of reminds me of the late Joan Rivers in a Ronald McDonald wig. Insert bad plastic surgery joke here.

Over all a darn good movie. It isn't going to win an Oscar but then have you actually watched some of the crap that HAS won an Oscar? If dick jokes, weed, booze and F-bombs turn you off then turn this off. Likewise if you hate the Trailer Park Boys you will hate this. If you like the TPBs then you will like this.

I give it a solid 8 out of 10

This film is said here to be rated NC-17 and it certainly deserves it. Apart from the fact that there's nudity, it has more uses of the f-word than any other film in history. Well, in the English language at least. It took me a long time to count every one of them. I counted 911, but there were said to be as many as 935. It is rather satisfying to see Carrot Top and Tom Green get beat up.

So besides that, there's not much else to say about this movie. It certainly has its funny moments, but is more or less not very interesting in itself. I couldn't get a feel for these characters or anything. It just seemed to be an excuse to be the most profane movie in history. Obviously, this isn't for people who are easily offended in really any way. The main plot involves a race of some kind, but it's hard to really care. **

When I first heard of SWEARNET THE MOVIE few years ago I was a bit reticent because despite the score of 6,1 has few reviews with mostly negative scores. But since I am some sort of omniscient half-God that can apparently digest everything, last September I finally had the courage of watching it and, as it progressed, I thought the naysayers must have seen a different movie instead of this one, it was so funny and had a great time.

The movie follows Mike Smith, Robb Wells and John Paul Tremblay that are tired of having their shows cancelled because of censorship. So they have a genius idea of creating their own network free from censorship. They'll end up being shunned from most of their neighbours and long-time friends up until they meet Carrot Top and Tom Green (playing themselves) on a charity event and do lots of crazy stuff such as Carrot going at very high speed, screaming and blowing the horn without reason, Green that insists on giving keychains to everyone up until Smith, Wells and Tremblay get angry and leave, only to make amends and later stage a fight with Carrot and Green and continue their network.

Even at the beginning I knew it was going to be a romp because of the stuff Smith, Wells and Tremblay did on their network, but as Carrot Top and Tom Green (who both have also the honour of putting me likes on Instagram for comments on their posts) it all improved. I don't think to have laughed so hard at a badly reviewed film like I did with this one, but I did thanks mostly to the both of them, they were so funny and great also in referencing their most known movies.

Overall, a great comedy that unfortunately ended up being misunderstood and forgotten but instead is great fun for folks over the age of 20. Not to be missed if you stumble upon it.

I ADORE the Trailer Park Boys i'll just pin that up before I go into anything. The characters are lovable, the narrative develops nicely and over offers a very interesting aspect and satire to Canadian life.

So what happened with Swearnet: The Movie? I struggled with this film so much. Its hard to watch a bad movie but it's harder to watch a bad movie with actors/writers that you love and have seen produce some great work in the past.

Swearnet:The Movie is the story of Robb Wells, John Paul Tremblay and Mike Smith creation of their own internet network 'Swearnet' and thats the plot in a nutshell. The movie likes to make things very clear that this ISN'T Trailer Park Boys with constant reminders at the beginning and if that wasn't enough perhaps to poor writing and Mike Smiths character would remind you enough. The whole execution of the movie plays out like a 14 year old boys pubescent fantasy. The jokes fall flat, the characters a largely unlikable and development of said characters doesn't exist instead they just switch like a light 3 quarters the way through which again is subject to poor writing. If it isn't enough that their own characters are marginally irritating then they brought in Tom Green and Carrot Top to make things wholly annoying as well as add absolutely nothing to the film. Their really isn't much that can be said about this film than it exists. It is a prime example of how a swearword can loose it's impact after repeated use and just become annoying and after a record breaking 935 F#@k's this has been proved 10 times over. I wouldn't recommend this film to anybody. Even if you're a fan of the Trailer Park Boys I would find anything but this to watch as the only feeling I got after this film finished was embarrassment and general sadness inside, don't get me wrong though their is way worse than this. 3/10

What's with the Negative reviews? I be like WTF!!!! Apparently you need to have a seriously immature sense of humor to enjoy this movie. And my funny bone is F'd up. But at the same time I can take things very serious when I need to. People need to open their minds and let the inner child out. Truth be told though, of course I like their TPB personas much more. But Swearnet was just plain funny. The cock jokes, the swearing, the substance abuse and the occasional nudity. I too hate censorship. If I could still post it, this review would be filled with swear words and possibly a picture of my cock.