Alice in Terrorland

Terrible, a mere waste of time and money. Wish i read the reviews before entering the theater. I was looking for a thriller/horror to enter with my wife, sadly there was no other movie and i was too lazy to read reviews before entering as there was nothing else to compare it to. 77 minutes later with nothing at all to discuss.

The acting was terrible, the effects were more like filters, the plot was too dull and finally the dialogue was full of itself for no reason.

Q: do you want to have a good time and may be some good memories about a movie?

A: see something else, literally anything other than this have a extremely significant chance in bringing you joy and delight.

While it was great seeing Rula Lenska* in a choice role pulling out all the stops, the production is a dreary misfire, full of imagery that bores rather than intrigues. A half hour's with of story is dragged out to a length that felt far longer than the running time. If you care to watch, fast forward to all of Lenska's scenes. The rest is, sadly, not to be recommended.

*I was a member of the Rula Lenska Fan Club here in the United States, a kind of parody of fan clubs since Lenska was only known for her Alberto VO5 TV ads in which she introduced herself, "I'm Rula Lenska," to a befuddled but bemused American public that had never heard of her before-her lack of notoriety became, itself, a sensation and a punch line for late night comedians like Carson. What the RLFC did successfully, with tongue in cheek, was humanize the actress with bits of news and background. Lenska already had a career overseas, so we heard about that too. I drifted away as I grew older and the novelty wore off. Lenska didn't catch on in a big way in the States, and years went by. First with video and flash forward to now with streaming, vintage overseas entertainment has thankfully become ever more readily available.

Me and my friend watched Alice in Terrorland primarily for the reason that Jon Paul Gates, who is an icon, is in it. That was our first mistake, the film is extremely dull and forgettable. With few scares and even fewer Jon Paul Gates (so sad!) What it does have going for it is its pretty good cinematography and interesting colour scheme.

The plot is confusing and unexciting, but at least they tried more than the average low budget horror flick of "this is a spooky house, here are some ghosts, be scared!" I liked the costumes in part too. But these few positives can't excuse such a dull, forgettable and lackluster film.

3/10: Such a dull film can't even justify its short run time.

It was soulless garbage, and a shallow attempt to make the classic Alice in Wonderland into a horror, which other media will tell you this actually can be done well. This wasn't one of those examples.

The dialogue is awkward, and weird. The idea that Alice is being read the original, and in her fever dream is being taken to wonderland could have worked actually. But damn, girl your fever dreams are boring. Even the idea that her parents have passed and that has altered her mental state, has existed before. This just does that badly.

The costume elements are boring. The pacing is weird and doesn't work. And it has moments where it tries to be edgy but, it falls flat because it's trying too hard.

This is the movie that should enforce the development of a " DO NOT WATCH " list on the Internet.

I watched it with a group of 7 friends and i kid you not half of them left during the first 10 minutes of the movie. If i were to direct this movie i wouldn't offer it to a dog let alone to actual cinemas. It was a disgrace to my eyes, ears, wallet, time, and body watching that movie. The plot line is so bland and meaningless, the movie has no motivation behind it, it is so low budget i can probably do a better remake with an iphone and my living room. The setting is completely centered around a single place which revolves around a single character that converses with a new person every 5 minutes about things that do not build up on the events that happened before. The director or whoever came up with the idea of this pointless movie should pursue another job. I am surprised it got a rating on IMDb when there is nothing good about the movie. Remove it from cinemas before people start blinding their own selves. Worst movie in cinematic history, if the inventor of cameras had watched this he probably wouldn't have invented cameras.

Overall rating: -7.2/10.