Dead on Appraisal

Oh my goodness, where to begin.

I saw this at the video store the other day and, after looking at the back of it thought it might be a good black comedy. There were some kooky looking characters that reminded me somewhat of characters from "Meet The Feebles" so I decided to take a chance. As so many will say when they are tearing something down, I am an avid horror fan. I've been reading horror for more than 40 years, and I grew up on horror films, and haunted houses. I've even written horror, and written, produced, and directed several horror shorts over the years. So, it's safe to say I do know my way around a chainsaw, machete, or graveyard.

That brings us to this film. I'm almost at a loss for words here. Yes it is an anthology style film, with another story running through the whole thing to hold it together. The back of the DVD cover looks pretty neat, and the title is kinda catchy. Here ends the nice comments.

This was a film that couldn't make up it's mind what it wanted to be. At times it took itself way to seriously, at other times it tried to throw itself headlong in to a dark comedy genre it just couldn't quite reach. "Tales From The Darkside:The Movie" was able to blend suspense, comedy, gore, and horror into one cohesive story with a good backing through line. "Terror Tract" starring the late great John Ritter, took the "hard to sell house because of tragedy" to a hilarious, and tension filled, level, succeeding in giving us multiple stories with a cohesive backing story. Dead on Appraisal", fails at all levels to attain anything even remotely close to these other films. At least one of the stories has a plot device that really challenges your ability to suspend belief, and leaves you with more questions than answers. The acting is wooden, the special effects, with a few exceptions, could have reached amazing heights, but they just fell short, and the demon, the less said the better. My 6 year old thought it was pretty awesome, but he loves excessive gore, and things that explode. This is a kid that normally can't sit through a horror film, and he loved it. Watch this film at your own risk, that's all I can say. I'm just glad I didn't pay more than $1.80 to rent it, and I might still ask for my money back.

I have been eyeing this movie for a very long time at my job, as I pass by it everyday putting movies on shelves. I had always wanted this movie because of the cover, and the premise that the summary on the back led me to believe. While I am happy to have this movie in my collection, I really cannot say I have any desire to rewatch it. The whole idea for this movie (In what drove me to buy it) in a way revolves around what the creepshow movies were, which I am a huge fan of, and the stories were not bad at all. The opening, and ending stories were actually pretty decent, and 2 middle stories I believe were lackluster, but had some somewhat decent acting in it, but I feel it lacked the charm that the creepshow movies had, but thats just my opinion. Like I said, I am happy to have it, I doubt I will rewatch it, but I am definitely not opposed to rewatching it.

"Dead on Appraisal" is a sleazy low budget movie. Yes, and when that is said you might think 'why watch it?' then. Well, if you like gory movies or splatterfests then you should check out this 2014 movie.

While the story made very Little sense in all its absurdity, then "Dead on Appraisal" was adequate entertainment for what it turned out to be. It is one of those types of movies that you watch simply to satisfy the inner gorehound. The storyline and acting is exactly what you would expect from a movie of this type, but it is all washed away in crimson gore and splatter effects.

However, there is absolutely no repeated viewing value to "Dead on Appraisal". You watch it once, then bag and tag it, never to watch it again.

As for the effects, then I will say that I was rather impressed with what the effects crew managed to put together. The creature designs were just hilarious and good for some laughs.

Take heed that "Dead on Appraisal" falls into a special genre and category of movie that might not appeal to just everybody. If you want a proper movie with a solid storyline, then this is not the movie for you. But if you want a blood-drenched, mindless gorefest, then this is right up your alley.