Monsters in the Woods

This movie is so dull and boring that even The Asylum or Troma might be embarrassed to release it. The plot in a nutshell is : a bunch of wanna-be film-makers venture into the woods to make a bad horror movie and are set upon by the afore-mentioned and barely-seen rubber-masked assailants. The movie is horribly 'color-corrected' into green-tinted nonsense. The 'FX' are not bad enough to be laughable or good enough to impress anyone. There is virtually no gore or even any nudity of note, but they DO toss in an impressive amount of 'Wilhelm Screams' and Commodore Amiga-caliber gunshots. O and there's a cave that looks like a menstruating vagina.

A film crew working on a creature flick finds themselves pursued by real creature and must fight to survive. The film stars directed by Glenn Plummer, who is a solid actor with a proven track record (Pasttime, The Corner, Things to Do In Denver When You're Dead, South Central,), but this is as poorly a directed film as Plummer himself has helmed (VooDoo Curse: The Giddah, 7 Deadly Sins failed to garner a rating higher than 2.6). Plummer must be on the outs with Hollywood's bigwig directors and now has been confined to "the goony leagues" of film actors, where actors' careers go to take their final breath. This film has it all-all bad, that is: Third-rate cinematography, f/x, acting, writing, pacing... sheesh. Director J. Horton has the nerve to flaunt to the world that this version is the Director's cut. At least he had sense enough not to use his full name, though he might've been better off passing this off as an Alan Smithee joint. This is 96 minutes of raw, fecal-scented sewage. If this were graded on an A-F scale this film would've earned a G-rating, and not because its palatable to General audiences.

This movie was God awful started with a man and woman having sex which I really don't understand why horror movies have to throw sex in there it doesn't make it any better for me if I want to see a sex movie I'll rent a porno I don't get it anyways this movie went no place after about 30 minutes I couldn't handle it anymore I took it out I will not watch this movie again I hate when they try to make documentaries like this and they go no place simply awful do yourself a favor don't ever buy this movie the movie I bought with came with 10 movies some are really lame some are so so. This one had terrible active I could have acted better myself just awful.

........Also.. Hardly any Shaky Camera shots. (this film can be watched without getting a Migraine).

Having said that, one of the worse things about this film Is: It was over two hours long. 90 Minutes would have been long enough.

The few who have commented so far, didn't think too much of this film. Neither do I, but IMO this was Not the Most Awful movie I've ever seen. For example: "BLAIR WITCH" for me, was painful, but I watched 'till the end.

I've been on both sides of the camera (but never quit my day job)- Never made any money, or got noticed, etc. - but it was FUN while I was involved. So maybe I just can't Trash anything; so if you have two hours with nothing else to do, get ready to view something that could have been made in the 50s.

Would I watch it again? Never. Would being numb Help? Couldn't hurt

MST3k2 shows stuff much worse then this, with bigger budgets; and lastly, during the 'dramatic' scenes, IMO the actors were really trying to Act.

At least this Group TRIED, and Released it, and got comments. Maybe their next attempt will be better.

Glenn Plummer has never been an A-grade actor though he has been in some pretty good movies in his career. This unfortunately doesn't fall into that category. Mr. Plummer must be broke to allow himself to be associated with a film of this calibre.

I really can't stress enough how terrible a movie this is. A terrible script executed terribly by actors who seem to have been stopped on the street and asked if they'd like to star in a monster movie. And speaking of the monster; Imagine fifties B-movies if you will. Now imagine a particularly bad one. That's what you get with this movie. Throw badly shot and badly directed into the mix and you get something I would call a C-movie. So poor as to be impossible to enjoy.

Yes, I know thirty grand is nothing for a movie budget but I'm sure that more skilled film makers could have conjured up something better with that money.

Whoever it was that rated this movie as a 10 must have either been involved in the making of it or having a laugh.

I am as capable of enjoying B-movies as the next person. Some are even favourite films. But I couldn't in good conscience recommend this movie to anyone. This movie is a must miss.