Witchville

Though not especially bad, it really wasn't very good either. I only stuck it out because Luke Goss is in it. If they'd cast almost anyone else, this would have died before it even started.

Sadly, although Luke Goss can usually elevate pretty much anything he's in, he can't do it single-handedly. He needs someone to play off of, someone to help him carry the load. He has none of that here. What he's got is some guy named Ed Speleers, who I kinda feel like I should know from somewhere but I can't quite place him, and a guy who looks like he's trying to be that one dude who's name I forget but I know him from playing a slightly villainous love child of Richard E Grant, Charles Shaughnessy, and Wish dot com.

The script is terrible, too - Malachy (Luke Goss) plays a dude who is the grown son of the king. The king has just died, so some other dude comes looking for Malachy and says "Bruv. You're the king now. B T dubs your subjects hated your dad and they hate you. Now go be king". But his new subjects are starving because of witch-related malarkey so they go off to kill the witch/es.

Nobody can act, though. Not the witch, not the witch's 2IC, not the 'magician' (the lovechild dude), not Ed Speleers, not his mate, and apparently not even Luke Goss could act while this was being made. But again, I blame that squarely on the 'script'. IMO the best acting here was from the guy who played the dead king. And you never see him. Ever.

2 of the 3 stars I gave this are purely for Luke Goss' presence. I can't help but be a fan. Blame it on his boy-band days.

I shouldn't rate this yet, haven't finished watching it, however, the Kramer character IS cracking me up. Does anyone else think he speaks like an English accented Captain Kirk, William Shatner 60's style?

The pacing and inflection is so funny. I wonder if he realized he was doing that?

hahah

"They............are...........among us.........even now. Pause "One meal..........for one man.............will not.........." and on and on.

I am an avid Sci Fi movie fan...books too....I just wish they had some better writers for the movies ON the Syfy channel. Sheesh. Don't waste your actors.....Luke Goss, Ed Speleers, James Frain (another movie) and more.

I'll watch anything with Luke Goss in it. He is just dang gorgeous.

So far, about a four on the ratings.

This reminded me a little of "In the Name of the King" (2007). Here instead of Jason Statham though, we have the completely out of his depth Luke Goss as the king "Malachy" and Ed Speleers as his hunky sidekick "Jason" as they try to save the kingdom from the clutches of the evil "Red Queen" (Sarah Douglas). It might have made for a perfectly watchable television movie had the acting been better, but Goss is frankly dreadful as he wields his broadsword with all the menace of a fairy liquid bottle. Speleers is always easy on the eye, but again he makes little impact as their set-piece escapades see them recruit new allies and head for a denouement with the vengeful monarch who breathes red smoke. The budget clearly wasn't huge, but to be fair the special effects folks, they have done a reasonable job at making the film look decent. The story, though, is weak and the writing does little to help overcome the obvious limitations of those delivering it on screen. It might kill ninety minutes on an aircraft somewhere - after a few glasses of something, but otherwise this offers nothing at all new or remarkable.

I have made no secret of disliking Syfy's output in general, but despite its awful title Witchville is actually one of the better ones in my opinion. Granted the title is really quite naff, the story is rather standard and didn't particularly surprise me and while I admired its ambition the dialogue is often quite weak and stilted. However, I liked Witchville. The production values are surprisingly not too bad for a low-budget movie, the sets and costumes look as though they were constructed with care, the scenery is beautiful and the effects are more consistent and less crude, the standout being the hellhound attack which did have me biting my nails. The sword-fighting scenes are efficiently done and nicely choreographed, the direction is competent and I too loved Jozefa's stylish entrances. The music is pretty tolerable too, while the acting while far from award-worthy is decent, especially MyAnna Buring. All in all, despite its weaknesses for me it is one of the better Syfy movies. 7/10 Bethany Cox

Another turkey! Should be rated Fantasy/Humour/Sleeping Pill. With due respect to a previous reviewer I don't agree with the mantra that it's a TV movie therefore don't expect the standards to be high. Why not? There are MANY TV movies which are probably better than cinema release stock.

The same old repeated clichés, jumps, twists turns, a storyline I've seen on numerous other occasions. Nothing that helps me to like OR dislike the characters.

The best piece of acting came from the witch who was burned in the first quarter of the movie.

Nuff Said