Pee-wee as Himself

Whatever can be said about Paul Reubens (Pee-Wee Herman), the best explanation of who he really was resides in this excellent new Max two-part documentary "Pee-wee as Himself." Essentially, this is Paul Reubens interviewing himself, unfolding his deeply personal and often lonely life and his hard fought and spectacular rise to fame from the ground up.

But then came his controversial arrest in Florida, and later, a dubious investigation in California, both having the net effect of killing his career. In a sometimes homophonic and politically-driven society, Reubens certainly had the deck stacked against him.

Reubens publicly "outs" himself in this documentary, something he could not safely bring himself to do throughout his personal and professional life. He likely felt at this point in his storied career he had nothing to lose.

Ironically, the filmmakers and even many of Reuben's closest friends had no idea that he was quietly fighting cancer. Paul, of course, knew, and he wanted to make sure his self revealing documentary would be shown after his death. For various reasons (explained in the documentary), it would not air until May 23, 2025.

Reubens passed away July 30, 2023 at age 70.

Paul Reubens was one of the true creative masters of our time. He didn't need a cartoon for his vision; he translated it into real life. The characters, the energy, the Playhouse itself, were so authentic and timeless that it felt like we were being invited into a safe space that lurked just behind the curtain of our everyday world. He managed to blend the mainstream with the avant-garde in such a way as to activate the full range of viewer imaginations and backgrounds- like all the best art. I remember checking my fridge during commercial breaks to see if we had any dancing food in there like Pee-wee's. And I was only partly disappointed when I found none... because I knew it was dancing when I wasn't looking. :)

This two-part doc by Matt Wolf offers a complete anthology of Paul's journey. We learn about his family and friends in Florida, early influences, education at CalArts, development at Groundlings, emergence on Broadway, and ultimately his superstardom on film and television amid the handful of personal issues that set him back.

I connected with the storytelling style here. It veers between historical clips, interviews and narration- notably from the man himself. Paul was a natural performer all the way through to the end. He talks to the camera as if he's sharing a secret with you. He's intellectually nimble, and his improv skills evidently never eroded. He knows precisely when to leaven adult anecdotes with juvenile humor: "Dad told me, 'Paul, if you're homosexual, I want you to be the greatest homosexual you can be'... so I went out that night to be the greatest homosexual ever- no, just kidding. ;)" His winsome attitude and smiling eyes make him a compelling speaker, and he means what he says in perfect earnest.

Learned a lot as well. Like how Pee-wee had a regular spot on Letterman before he made it big; he was once a contestant on The Dating Game; at CalArts he was part of an absurdly talented 10-actor ensemble that included Katey Sagal (= Peg Bundy) and David Hasselhoff (= HOFF!); and at Groundlings he laid the foundation for the Playhouse with mainstays Phil Hartman (Captain Carl) and John Paragon (Jambi). So if you're a Pee-wee fan, it's delightful. And if you're learning about him for the first time I'd love to be in your shoes because he's a total original whose greatness will inspire you.

Was there anyone who actually believed that Paul was a pedophile? There was never any there there. Yet the label tormented him until the day he died, as revealed by some gripping footage where he addresses the miasma of innuendo that swirled around his name. I'll never understand whose agenda we serve by perpetuating falsehoods against those who mean well. All I can say is, thank you Paul for laving pure joy over the world and sharing your singular artistry with us all. Your reputation remains clean to me, and legacy of Pee-wee Herman will be cherished forever. Conky's secret word today is LEGEND.

---

"I just felt I could be the beacon out there and say it's okay to be different. It's okay to be creative. In fact not only is it okay, but let's celebrate it." - Paul Reubens.

It's challenging trying to explain the huge appeal of Peewee Herman to those who never saw him or didn't get it. A unique blend of irony, sincerity, nostalgia and quirky charisma, Paul Reubens created his man-child character based on the 50's kids TV he loved in boyhood - and succeeded brilliantly.

In part one, director Matt Wolves delves into young Paul's obsession with performance and fame - and how he reached it. Along the way, though, Paul sets aside his personal life and a loving gay relationship to focus on his career. His reward is graduating from the Groundlings improv to regular appearances on Letterman and the Tonight Show - and ultimately a hit Hollywood movie.

As revealed in candid interviews, Reubens' hunger for fame was so great that he became jealous over credit given to director Tim Burton for the success of Peewee's Big Adventure - he did not want to share it.

Part II looks at the dark challenges in his life. These included a career-hobbling arrest in a Florida sex shop and a later witch-hunting investigation by the LAPD - with groundless news leaks about pedophilia. What is amazing is watching the resilience of Reubens and his supportive close friends, his family - and many fans.

Tragically, we also learn that the secretive Reubens suffered with cancer for six years before his death - which he kept from the film team telling his story.

The film's later chapters also touch on the irony of a performer accustomed to final-cut control on his projects fencing with the director telling his life story. It leads to revealing and sometimes awkward exchanges.

In total it's a compelling rise and fall and rise again life story that ended far too early.

There's an astonishing honesty about this documentary that Pee-wee admits: Few of us get to make a final statement about their lives. The filmmakers were unaware that Paul Ruebens was battling cancer for several years before they made the film. In fact, Paul padded away a few months after it was completed. Like Walter Isaacson's biography of Steve Jobs, a person facing death finds honest self-revelation easier than a person still protecting their identity and public image. Through out the film, Paul Ruebens consistently reveals that he finds it difficult to separate his alter-ego Pee-wee from the person Paul. When he gets a star on the Hollywood walk of fame, he notes that it was Pee-wee whose name is on the star, not Paul's. There are many revelations about Pee-wee's creative process including how the storyline of Pee-we's Big Adventure came about. While he and writer-director Tim Burton were developing the screenplay on the Warner Brothers studio, he saw many actors riding the lot of bicycles, so he asked: How do I get a bicycle? The next day, a 1950s era Schwinn DX showed up outside his office. Pee-wee ran into the office and told Burton he knew the plot would center on Pee-wee's love for that bicycle, how it would be stolen and how his adventure would be getting to back. It's a beautiful film about a child-like actor who mixed his fantasies with life's realities.

Despite being listed as an executive producer, Paul Reubens was apparently distrustful (and possibly contemptuous) of the making of this documentary about his life, his career, and his famous alter-ego, Pee-wee Herman. If so, he needn't have been so fearful as director Matt Wolf has whittled down some 40hrs of interview footage into a well-paced, well-narrated 3hr-22mns (separated into two parts for release on HBO and Max). Born Paul Reubenfeld in chilly Peekskill, NY, the children's TV show-loving Paul was happy to eventually relocate with his family to Sarasota, FL, where the local Ringling Bros. Circus activity sparked the theatrical performer in young Paul. As an incredibly ambitious, smart, self-aware young adult, Paul Reubens' flair for outré style in college turned "weird" into an art form, and he was never without admirers of both sexes. Joining an acting troupe in Los Angeles--eventually known as The Groundlings--Reubens tried out different characters on-stage before settling on his most popular creation, the child-like Pee-wee Herman. That's where this documentary really takes off, showing how a long-fought journey to fame paid off for Paul--and how stardom isn't always a fair trade for anonymity. For fans, this is a terrific summation of an iconic man--warts and all--who loved making people laugh but who was also a perfectionist and a bit of a diva. At one point, Reubens acknowledges that his entire focus was "Me, me, me", and he's defensive and bitter about the legal troubles that dogged him in his final years ("The public has a mind like a steel trap!"). Did Paul Reubens ever forgive some of his fans and former colleagues for turning their backs on him when times got rough? Maybe not--but he certainly wasn't regretful at the time of his death in 2023. He had nothing to feel sorry about. *** from ****