Dealing with Dad

I'm a sandwich generation parent/caregiver. In his dramedy, Dealing with Dad, filmmaker Tom Huang captures the very essence of Sandwich Generation living. He does so with heart and hilarious humor! All the while tackling themes such as parent/child dynamics, sibling issues, mental health, and racial/cultural topics.

The very first scene of this movie hooked me. It put into a visual some much of how I've felt during my caregiving journey. I feel so seen!!!

I highly recommend this movie! I've seen it about 5 times now and laugh every time!!! Definitely put it on your watch list! It'll lighten the load of what can be an overwhelming and hard road of a caregiver.

IN A NUTSHELL: The story is about Margaret, who reluctantly goes back to her hometown with her brothers to deal with the sudden depression of her father.

The film premiered at an Asian-American Film Festival and will definitely find its audience among Asian immigrants. It has already won an impressive number of awards!

The film was both written and directed by Tom Huang, based loosely on his personal experience and that of his Asian-immigrant friends.

One of my sons married a lovely girl from Hong Kong. Their little son is surrounded by Asian families in America where they live. I'm so grateful I've been able to go to China many times so that I can help instill a love for that rich culture in his heart.

THINGS I LIKED: The cast includes Ally Maki, Hayden Szeto, Peter S. Kim, Dana Lee, Karan Soni, Jeff Atlas, and Page Leong.

I've been trying to learn Mandarin, so it was fun to hear some of the characters in the story speak Mandarin.

Those in the Asian community will probably see a lot of familiar territory in the story. Non-Asians will get a glimpse into Asian families and their unique traditions and perspective.

The film could easily be turned into a sitcom and already feels a little like one.

The story seems very realistic.

There is a lot of humor, although not all of it landed for me.

THINGS I DIDN'T LIKE: So much yelling and fighting among the characters got on my nerves. I don't find that entertaining or funny.

I've never understood parents who complain when their adult kids don't call them. The phone works both ways.

I didn't really like any of the self-absorbed characters. They're constantly angry, snarky, and criticize each other. I'm so grateful I didn't grow up in a family like that. Neither did my husband, so we've been able to raise 4 respectful, kind sons.

I love alliteration in titles, but the name of the movie instantly reveals the attitudes of the children: they have to DEAL with their dad rather than CARE for him.

Unfortunately, the movie is forgettable.

TIPS FOR PARENTS: Profanity, including F-bombs Talk of racism Some crude conversations.

Siblings get into a fistfight.

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This is a very funny but also moving look at adult children struggling to figure out what to do about their father's depression. Don't let the subject matter fool you though: this is definitely a comedy. But it also explores how a loved one's mental illness complicates the family dynamic and how various members of a family can have very different approaches to handling it. The characters all seem like real people. Real, very quirky, often difficult people. The mother character especially seemed like people I have known. I saw the movie with my 17-year-old son, and he also thought it was hilarious.

This film really hits you over the head with the fact that the children (who are now adults) had a rough childhood. They are still dealing with that trauma today - each in their own way. But, the interesting and relatable thing is that they know this. They recognize it and are dealing with it.

When it comes time to face the source (one of them) of that trauma, tough decisions are being made. There is internal and external struggles that are not unique to just this family but can be relatable to most.

Overall, yes, this is a "comedic drama" if you will. The humor is there and it delivers. It helps to soften the stronger, darker tones being discussed. It is a good film that is easy to watch and enjoy.

My wife and I were able to catch this on the opening night of the Austin Asian American Film Festival on June 23, 2022. Wonderful movie! Lots of creative energy among the cast. The pace is quick, the writing is fantastic, lots of sharp zingers. Most of the credit will go to writer/director Tom Huang and leading lady Ali Maki (as Margaret). However, Page Leong as the prototypical "FOB" Asian mom (Sophie) was also fantastic. That having been said, pretty much everyone was very entertaining. Each actor brought his/her own special energy to the role. The result sparkled!

After the show, we were lucky enough to have director Tom Huang and actor Dana Lee (as the difficult Dad) for a live question and answer session. They discussed the background of the story in Tom Huang's own experiences, but also the kind of interesting network-of-friends process for assembling the cast and the personal perspectives that each actor brought to the movie - not to mention the arduous filming conditions at the height of the pandemic. My take away was that this movie is a great example of the adage that the whole is greater than the sum of the parts.

Particularly highly recommended for Asian immigrants, Asian Americans, and others who have married into the community. However, I think this movie will be a fun evening for almost anyone, even if you have no personal Asian connection.