Croc

Abominable special effects threaten to sink this Thai "Jaws" clone, until, mercifully the makers decided to give the croc a break and focus on some more convincing local themes that resurrect this film from total and utter decay. Owner/operator of a struggling Thai zoo (Tuinstra) finds himself up against more than just the local corrupt businessman (Junsook) and his crooked, petty criminal brother (Saetong) when a large salt water crocodile that has migrated from Australia threatens the tourist trade. Predictably, he elects to hunt the creature himself, with the aid of his long suffering sister (Healey) her son (Hazell) an animal welfare official (Phungprasert) and a peg-leg drunken fisherman whose motivations are noble (Madsen) in spite of the $50,000 reward offered for its destruction.

The first twenty minutes of this action-thriller are diabolically bad in almost every facet, and there is real cause for concern that the picture is going to descend to grade Z depths. Alas, somehow, the amateurish acting improves (relatively) and the narrative even shows glimpses of local content – Madsen's quest to avenge the deaths of "those who couldn't swim fast enough", reminded of their suspended souls through photographs he keeps in the cabin of his boat, is a nice touch. But despite his compassionate interior, what would a Michael Madsen character be without a prop or two, and typically, alcoholism is again his preference ("a shot of OJ in your vodka?").

The filmmakers spare little in their pursuit of shocks, whether it's children dragged into the depths in front of hysterical parents, randy teenagers snatched while they canoodle in the surf, or just a pair of no-good villains being dismembered in their own pool. Such is the variety of severed limbs, torsos, decapitated heads and decomposing corpses (check out the rigor mortis in the croc's "larder") that it's surprising that some enterprising local didn't open a spare parts shop. One scene in which a distraught gangster's girlfriend identifies butchered remains beggars belief; how she managed to identify him from the meat pate into which he was minced is one of the movie's unintended laughs (and there are others to enjoy). At least it's good to see local talent, locations and bystanders involved in the filmmaking process, exposure essential to growing a more commercial film industry in Thailand.

Stuck with a series of professional crises, the owner of a croc farm and a group of locals team with a croc hunter to stop the rampaging crocodile leaving a trail of blood across Thailand.

This was overall a pretty decent killer croc film with some really good points about it. One of its better elements is the rather impressive amount of attacks throughout here which has a large pull on the whole film. There's a wide variety of attacks here, from the brief ones like the attack on the fishermen in the lagoon or the chomping on the dock to get at the dog which are built-off surprise ambushes and shocks, while the more prolonged sequences throughout here from the family's encounter in the bay or their hunting party's first encounter out along the off-shore reefs that really showcase a lot of action within this. Both of these situations give this one some great points here by really making for a frantic pace that keeps the film at a brisk, enjoyable pace by managing enough attacks and encounters to keep this one quite exciting. That all of these attacks also brings in some really worthwhile blood and gore from the chomped-on bodies and severed limbs makes for some really good times here which makes this hold up somewhat against the few problems here. The biggest issues here is the fact that there's way too many subplots and alternate story lines that just drag out the film in the first half. The different issues between the gang-boss and the animal zoo isn't the slightest bit interesting, almost as much as his difficulty with the personnel in his own gang and really drag the first half out with these pointless rivalries and internal squabbling. Otherwise, this one really has a bit of schizophrenia about its titular creature which is quite distracting how this deals with the beast. While it's commendable to use real-life crocs here, there's a series of shots which not only fail to get the species right but also manages to flip between different ages as well. This one is played for both alligators and crocodiles of vastly different species, and on top of that the monstrous beast is played by full-size adults and babies which is quite distracting against the CGI and animatronic crocodile props for a wholly unsatisfying creature. These issues hold this one down.

Rated R: Graphic Violence and Graphic Language.

Croc (2007)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

In Thailand a couple teenagers are killed by a crocodile and an American owner of a croc farm gets blamed but he knows it wasn't one of his animals. It turns out that it's really a twenty-footer and thankfully there's a hunter (Michael Madsen) that has been tracking it and plans to take it out. This is a rather strange film because it seems like the screenwriter didn't have any idea where he wanted to take the story so they just went in whatever direction they felt like at the time of shooting. The entire plot is set up around this American guy being hated by a couple brothers from Thailand and their constant attempt to get him out of business. We get countless scenes where the brothers send tax men, police, animal welfare and various other people over to get him to go out of business and I kept wondering to myself why all of this was needed. It certainly goes no where and it doesn't help that we never find out why this guy wants to set up shop here and what got him there to begin with. As far as the crocodiles go, we get a mixture of real footage as well as some really bad CGI stuff. The CGI attacks are all very bad simply because they're so obviously fake. There's not a single attack here that comes off looking real and even the blood is bad CGI most of the time. For the life of me I can't understand why producers don't mind the effects looking this cheap and bad but oh well. Another major problem is that none of the characters are at all like able but this is certainly due to the screenplay that seems to build up the dumbest bit of information on them and we get even dumber scenes like the stuff at the bar when the Americans are trying to pick up some girls. The T&A level is at zero and the death scenes are all bad so those looking for any kind of sleaze are going to be disappointed. None of the performances are very memorable and that includes Madsen who is obviously just picking up a paycheck. The only major plus to this film is that it was actually shot in Thailand, which gives us some terrific visuals but that's about it. There aren't any scares either so we're left with a pretty bad flick that should only be viewed by those who must see every killer croc movie out there.

CROC may be no LAKE PLACID, but it isn't completely terrible. A very large croc is on the loose, and a bunch of folks, including Michael Madsen in a goofy white hunter's hat, are after it. The young cast playing with Madsen is mostly appealing, and the action rarely lets up. The CGI is minimal, and it would appear a lot of the croc shots are of real crocs. The ending is a bit of a problem, as you will see when and if you watch it. It would appear they ran out of film a little too soon. Or maybe they ran out ideas. Shot in picturesque Thailand and directed by Stewart Raffil of MAC AND ME and ICE PIRATES fame. Or is that infamy?

Another in Sci-Fi (SyFy) channel's never ending quest to rip off famous monster movies with silly copies, and rip human victims to pieces to accomplish this.

Mutant crocs develop a taste for human cuisine, and run amok in some Asian coastal town. Victims rarely have names, but plenty of spurting red paint when a croc makes a Big Mac out of them. Few characters get even one click above nameless slaughter-meat: an animal welfare agent (who also handles animal social security and animal medicare), a croc hunter (a Capt. Quint clone from Jaws), a carnival barker guy who does a sea-life Shamu type show, carnival barker's moronic cousin, and a stereotypical sunglasses and black suit bad guy in a limo (who looks like he was supposed to be in a kung-fu movie, but got on the set for this one by mistake). Said baddie has countless stooges who end up as croc snacks, of course.

The acting is questionable, but I've seen worse. The director gives this routine hungry monster flick some good pacing, although the script writer has offered nothing new. The croc is just some Animal Planet footage, and the dozens of decapitated heads are obviously Halloween masks with red paint splattered on them. I did like the puppy's acting; his barking was very realistic. He and the croc are the standout performers.

You'll know two minutes in who's gonna get devoured, and the fact that this film will win no Oscar awards. It is however, good cinematic fast food, which is all it's trying to be.