Der Nussknacker

I'm sure there's been the occasional viewer that wonders why I do get so angry about movies sometimes. Well, films are something that I'm very passionate about, every movie that I've seen goes from that is praised with comments or hate with every cell of my brain.

And speaking of the literal Devil, we have ourselves "The Nutcracker in 3D"!!!

...This is the worst movie I've ever seen!!!! First of all, Anderi Konchalovsky directed this crap! He previously directed "Runaway Train" and the TV-movie "The Odyssey". I can't accept this!!! How is that possible that he went from a groundbreaking movie and a cult fantasy film to This?!?

What's the point on making a movie with Nazi Rats (They are Mice in the original story, you idiots!!!) that burn toys like how they did to the Jews?!?

OK, if Konchalovsky wanted to make a despotic movie with Nazis represented like greedy rats and other political animal-alike allusions that's OK! It's interesting! ...But leave the classic story of the Nutcracker alone!!!

It would be like... If I make a movie about the tale of Aladdin, where Aladdin is Obama, Jafar is a Bin Laden, Agrabah a New York-alike city destroyed by terrorist attacks and The Genie be an incarnation of Uncle Sam! Oh, and all this weird despotic crap pretended to be a "kids movie". No!No!No!!! That's not how it works!!! I'll describe the two scenes that mostly offended me: the Rat King, after performing a bad-choreographed musical number, kills a shark inside a tank by electrocuting it with a light!!! The second one, the Rat King suddenly rips off the head of a living Drummer Boy with bare hands and for a few seconds he plays volleyball with his Nazi-soldiers using the head of the poor guy and than replace it and act like nothing happened! You know, for KIDS!

But of course, these are the images that comes to your mind when you think of the Nutcracker! ...Nazi creatures that burn toys, kill sharks and play volleyball with the head of their victims HELLO?!?

The movie is an awful waste of money and talent(...If there was ANY!!!), and it sucks balls because for the unappealing Nazi characters, the awful 3D effect and for turning Tchaikovsky's music into horrendous songs that makes "Marry the Mole" look like Bohemian Rhapsody!!!

And I'm not the only person who thinks this "movie" in an abomination: 0% on Rotten Tomatoes! And Roger Ebert said: "The Nutcracker in 3D is one of those rare holiday movies that may send children screaming under their seats." In fact, no kid went to see this movie! The Nutcraker in 3D was a giant NUT-BOMB at the box office!!!

This movie is one of those rare movies that can insult the intelligence of Anybody. Do not watch it.

One of the worst movies I have seen in the recent times. Usually i would try to find some good point in a movie, but no matter how I crack (no wonder I just watched nutcracker!) my head . . . nothing. Well, I do not want to take the credit away from the character of Mary, which was the only respite due to which at least I am rating 2 out of 10. When you go for such movies usually plot is not up for critical review, but this movie beats the lowest of the standards. Music is terrible, actors (except Elle) are worse, the flow of the movie allows anybody to keep jumping out for some popcorn. One might expect at least some 3D effects to feel compensated for the time, but clearly the movie (except for the first few scenes) are much late adaptation for 3D and literally makes you feel cheated. Usually, such movies that are targeted towards younger audiences manage extra chuckles from the young ones in the theater, but this movie succeeded in getting yawns from them!.

I don't usually do this. I don't really care enough to post on here, but for this travesty of a movie I had to register. This film has: horrible acting, horrible plot, horrible script, rotten to the bone.

I have no idea for whom this movie was made, in appropriate for children boring and immature for adults. The only saving grace is that they spent 90 million on it and only got back a few grand. Anyone associated with this piece of crap should be ashamed of themselves.

PS: I'm willing to bet money that anyone giving this a positive review is either associated with the film and has no soul, or has recently been the victim of a horrible TBI.

Disappointing in most respects. Inconsistent plot, poor lyrics, poor music adaptation, unconvincing acting for most of the movie. Like most reviewers will probably acknowledge, the visual effects are OK, but have no cause to serve. The film is a waste of nice animation, exactly what I wouldn't have expected from Koncealovski. And now, for a few upsetting details...

It is very difficult to become attached to any of the characters, because they are so superficially introduced. I don't get the real feeling of a backstory, which actually damages the whole universe of the film. Mary is the only character which seems alive, for better or worse. Otherwise, they are all pale and unconvincing.

The techno-fairy tale / political satire mix doesn't help either. I'm thinking of loads of splices you'd be able to make, starting from an original fairy tale, and I can't understand why you'd combine a Disney style dramatization with an oppressed-toys(and humans)-against-evil-nazi-rats uprising. It's not fun enough for adults, it's not simple and clear enough for children. And it doesn't have so much to do with the original...

And talking about the original, the use of Tchaikovsky's music is uninspired, to say the least. The adaptation sounds simplistic, and voices may not have been a good idea. First of all, because it used to be a ballet and, call me a rigid type, but I'd have loved to see it developed on this line. Second, because the lyrics are dull, and the actors' voices sound really bad at times (ok, try to make it sound natural but do follow the notes!). Third, because the modern orchestration further reduces the charm of the original, turning it into a sort of kindergarten party song. As far as the musical part goes, I'm taking Sweeney Todd as a reference. And, compared to this, Nutcracker is way below.

Bottom line? Don't see it, even if the other guy is paying. It's plain loss of time and a poor reference about the classics, if you have any children.

Even the kids hated it. At end daughter asked if we could put it in the rubbish. I wanted to stop watching by halfway.

Holocaust themes, dark and violent for younger children, and lots of rat teeth.

To be fair, make-up and costumes were alright plus Elle Fanning is gorgeous and a talented actress but even as the main redeeming feature she was unable to support this holocaust-themed bastardisation of a ballet. Tim Rice may be good at lyrics but the breaks into song were un-natural and whole thing forced, boring and dreary. Composers would be turning in their graves. I truly hope I never watch this again!