The Courier

A Courier (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) is tasked with delivering a package to a crime boss (Mickey Rourke) thought to be dead. Hilarity ensues.

"Yeah, I Watched This Movie". That's the attitude I had when "The Courier" reached its conclusion. We have seen this type of movie before, often, and we have had more fun at the expense of a larger budget. But like so many other movies nowadays, we feel a bit let-down when the screen goes black.

Jeffrey Dean Morgan, an exceptional actor who never seems to be the right fit for his character, does the best he can with what he has. His character wakes up in a crummy apartment infested with mice. He uses superglue to fix a nasty cut. Yet despite all this self-loathing, he has good friends and family that he cares about. What's with that?

The female lead is bizarre. Her hairstyle makes it appear as if her follicles are desperate to escape from her scalp, and considering how bad it is, I can't blame it for trying. She also has an unnecessary dubbing-over occasionally when she speaks. Perhaps they shot the film and forgot to record her at places.

Mickey Rourke and Til Schweiger, the other draws on the cover, are under and wrongly used. Rourke's head is only visible for the first half of his scenes, the latter's introduction is corny. Schweiger's bodyguard hasn't ever seemed to have used a fire arm before, let alone in a movie.

An odd assortment of has-beens and ne'er-do-wells fill out the rest of the cast. Lily Taylor and Miguel Ferrer play a Team Rocket type pair of villains who never say much besides grunts and gunshots. Mark Margolis, the definitive "that guy!" of actors plays Morgan's dad, or something. I'll give you one guess as to his fate.

"Yeah, I Watched That Movie." That is what I will say to people when they ask if I have seen "The Courier". And it might take me a minute to remember exactly what they are talking about.

Jeffrey Dean Morgan is a specialist in delivering packages without questions in Hany Abu- Assad's, The Courier. The best in this niche industry, Morgan is forced to take on a job to protect those close to him by delivering a package to someone who is supposedly dead. A dark mystery unravels as he gets closer to discovering the truth about his target and himself.

With notable performances on the small screen in Supernatural and Grey's Anatomy as well as a significant contribution in Zack Snyder's, Watchmen, one shouldn't be surprised with Morgan headlining a suspense thriller. Thing is, you wish he had opted out of this feature. Even with recognisable faces, The Courier has that low-budget feel about it and the story never really hooks you. It's a respectable attempt but the plot really doesn't blow your mind away and may instead give you a headache. After a while it begins to get tedious and you decide to follow it to the end only to write a review!

Assad's attempt isn't amateurish but it certainly isn't award winning. Morgan gives a solid performance with what he's got but it's nowhere near enough. The story is, well, blah and this is one to miss.

... you can't be bothered to write a review. This is one of those films.

and now I have to fill out 10 lines of text for the minimum review length. Sometimes I sort of wish I never started doing something, so I guess in a way writing this review is very much like The Courier, essentially pointless and a complete waste of my time and not even getting to the level of 'so bad it's good'. It's actually amazing that I've managed to write this much to be honest, I only finished watching The Courier 10 minutes ago and it's already slipping out of my brain to the extent that I'm not entirely sure what actually happened at the end anymore (the first half has gone already). Normally this would be good as valuable brain space isn't being taken up by The Courier but I expect by the end of the day all memory of this very forgettable film will be erased from my memory which leaves the very real possibility that one day in the future I might see it's title when I'm looking for some rubbish action film to watch and actually waste my time by watching it again with a nagging sense of déjà vu and I won't be sure if it's because I've watched the courier before or that it's just generic rubbish.

So that's 10 lines of text done (in fact more than 10 lines which is a lot more than The Courier deserves) so I'm going to do something more interesting than watching The Courier such as watching paint dry or sitting in a dark empty room.

"Walking out the door doesn't mean it's over." The courier (Morgan) is the best at what he does. If you have a package that needs to be delivered he will ask no questions and get it there on time. When he is approached with a deal, deliver a briefcase and get a million dollars, but if he fails his family will be killed. Realizing he has no choice he accepts. When he finds out the recipient is a feared killer and people he meets are out to get him the job becomes much more then a simple delivery. I know what you thinking...this sounds like the "Transporter" and you couldn't be more wrong. The courier in this movie doesn't drive everywhere, he runs too. He doesn't find a girl in the trunk of a car, he just finds her. He doesn't try and deliver a briefcase to someone but ends up being a target himself....wait...never mind. This is not a 100% copy but it's close. I like Morgan but Statham is really the only one who should do this role. If you liked the "Transporter" then you will probably like this one. The ending did make it a little better and the second half was entertaining but this is pretty much "Transporter 4". Overall, not bad but they should have called it what it is. I give it a B-.

OK this film isn't bad.

The first reason why it's disappointing it's because - just like Black Death (2010) - it tries to "keep it real" way too much .. films need escapism, to a point, and here it almost seems that they decided to go full speed for the not-Hollywood look.

Now i'm not one to defend Hollywood, but what kills this film is that the direction is poor; it fails to capitalise on the realism, instead giving me a film that looks like an amateur production. Some of the shots are truly amateurish, and often the camera-work fails to make a scene interesting.

Having said that, The Courier isn't half bad, there are plenty things i liked in it, from the fight moves to the casting (the lead is a bit wooden, the girl fits the part OK~ish, the detective is perfect), and the whole production is pretty decent.

I also don't subscribe to the whole "it's full of cliché'" thing; if anything, it tries to avoid clichés in a film genre where everything has already been done.

All in all, i can say that it's an interesting film to watch, even though i get the feeling the director has a background in TV - seriously, you (whomever you are) truly murdered what could have been an interesting flick.

So, after all considerations, i give The Courier a decent 6/10 - better than MI3, and no Tom Cruise.