Yeti - Das Schneemonster

I had the misfortune to watch this rubbish on Sky Cinema Max in a cold winter night. I am not a big fan of horror movies, because most of them are just trash. This one is even worse: it is one of the dumbest pieces of crap i've ever seen in my whole life. Horror movie? Yes, there are horrible things in this: the acting, the script and the special effects - Gosh, i laughed at this ludicrous attempt to make a flick for 90 minutes. Actually, had it been a comic movie i would've given it a 5. Don't you even think about renting this unless you want to mock at the producers.

Vote: 2 out of 10 - didn't vote one because it made me laugh all the time ;-)

This movie is a sci fi run of the mill script about a Yeti killing humans. Some people crash in the jungle. Two people go to rescue them, and a Yeti tries to kill them.

It doesn't take itself too seriously. The actors all do their jobs very well. There's nothing really wrong with the production itself. The script is very tedious and trite. The characters aren't exactly multi dimensional for the most part, but are better than some of what you're used to seeing in modern science fiction.

For some reason, everyone is real young in the story. So much so, that it detracts from the story, and makes it look more like a farce.

Some of the usual stupid bloody gore to make the nerds laugh, and red necks guffaw. Cute girls, rather attractive cast all around.

Probably nothing you'll remember to speak of the next day. But not overly dull or annoying.

Ah yez, the Sci Fi Channel produces Yeti another abominable movie. I was particularly taken by the scenes immediately following the crash where, as the survivors desperately searched for matches, at least a half dozen fires burned – with no apparent reason – at various points of the wreckage. Fire seemed to be a predominate theme throughout. They searched corpses for lighters and matches, and finally finding a box built a fire every day for, apparently, 12, but no one ever gathered wood. Then when the vegan (hah) burned the bodies, what did she use for an accelerant? I mean these guys were frozen – well maybe not. Despite the apparent low temperature everything the yeti ate, bled. Maybe it's just me, but even in a totally unbelievable tale (none of the survivors had ever heard of a yeti, or an abominable snowman, until the very end), if you take care of the little things the bigger deals become more acceptable. Oh, what did the prologue (1972) have to do with the remainder of the movie? And the revolver, warm enough to hold in his hand, froze up and wouldn't fire. Gimme a break. Well, at least we have Carly Pope, another eminently lovely Canadian lass. And, with little irony, Ed Marinaro as the coach.

Well I might as well add, the rabbit they ate (despite it looking like chicken) is not a rodent, but a lagomorph. Now if it had been a squirrel (or a rat) it would have been a rodent, but it still looked like chicken. And the writers missed a real chance to have someone note "It tastes just like..."

As the opening credits roll, a flashback establishes the presence of a big ugly monster in the Himalayas. Named "Yeti" in the title, it makes a man scream bloody murder… Sometime later, in the "Present Day," an airplane carrying a college football team crashes in the cursed area. The survivors struggle to stay alive while the monster lurks. Making the task very difficult, the predatory "Snow Demon" feeds on people and as an affinity for gore. Handsome blond Marc Menard (as Peyton Elway) and beautiful brunette Carly Pope (as Sarah) head up the cast. The best supporting parts go to sneaky Adam O'Byrne (as Ravin) and sensitive Elfina Luk (as Kyra) – one wants to start eating the dead almost immediately, the other would rather eat Chicken (as Rabbit) until they are rescued...

The lessor supporting roles go to rescue team Peter DeLuise (as Sheppard) and Ona Grauer (as Fury). The latter sports Vulcan eyebrows. They wisely send their helicopter pilot home and decide to simply walk around the Himalayas looking for the plane crash. When they spot fire they don't radio for help – preferring to walk several days, instead. This kind of stupidity runs rampant in the movie, credited to Mark L. Lester and Rafael Jordan and assigned to director Paul Ziller. The survival story is obviously swiped from "Alive" (1993), with the "Yeti" monster throw in as the environmental predator. There's stiff competition for silliest scene, but it may be "Yeti" snuggling up with Ms. Pope in a cave. At least, the end shows filmmakers knew we would be laughing at this lunacy.

*** Yeti (Curse of the Snow Demon) (5/18/08) Paul Ziller ~ Marc Menard, Carly Pope, Adam O'Byrne, Elfina Luk

A football team is flying over the Himalayan Mountains when their plane crashes in desolate territory. Bodies are searched for food and lighters in order to survive. But the team has bigger problems than the cold: they have landed in the vicinity of the legendary yeti, and he's plenty hungry.

This made-for-TV movie directed by Paul Ziller and written by Rafael Jordan, neither of whom have offered anything noteworthy thus far in their careers. I'm not sure that this will really boost either of their careers, as it, too, is nothing noteworthy. In fact, it's a largely pointless endeavor. Even the cast is pretty much a group of unknowns, with the minor exception of Crystal Lowe, whom you're unlikely to have heard of unless you follow movies closely.

What makes me curious is whether this film is intended to be bad, or is just plain bad. That makes a difference, as I can forgive a film's badness if the intent was self-deprecation. For example, the star quarterback's name is Peyton Elway. Now, I'm not a fan of the NFL -- I don't even know the names of my local team's starting lineup, but I do know who Peyton Manning and John Elway are. So the reference was about as obvious as can be. Please tell me this was intended as a bad joke and not as a poor attempt to be clever.

I have to say the airplane animation was not needed, and the same with the yeti. The airplane looks especially cheesy while crashing, and I felt the point was made adequately from just the interior shots. The yeti, which required an elaborate costume, repeatedly is shown jumping and running as a cartoon. Why? Did the crew have no faith in the costume? If they can show it close up, surely it would look fine at a distance -- I mean, it's not as bad as "Raptor Island", but still.

The one thing this film has going for it, besides a decent survival narrative (which, ironically, is ruined rather than strengthened by the yeti), is a brief limb-beating scene. It's close to the end, so you'll have to sit through plenty of bull first. And, sadly, despite a football team -- with women -- on a plane, no mile high club (see "Snakes on a Plane", or better yet, don't).

Conclusion: The Maneater series has some decent entries ("Croc") and some not-so-decent entries ("Blood Monkey"). This one falls somewhere in the middle. Interesting enough to hold your attention, but not interesting enough to recommend to friends or watch a second time. And since the disc comes with no special features, there's no good reason to spend more time on this one than the 87 minutes of running time.