Blood Car

Appropriately crude "black comedy" that although wildly uneven, cannot be denied. There are a few knockout scenes of very dark humor, with the final toss in the trunk being the most outrageous of all. The absurd idea of a car developed by a vegan kindergarten teacher that runs on blood is inspired. Sure there are scenes that drag, sure there is an annoying amount of unnecessary four letter words, sure there is too much gratuitous sex, but in the end the film works because of the creativity on display. Gas is over $30.00 / gallon, but our hero can still fill - er - up. .......................................................... - MERK

Do you worry about the price of fuel? If the price continues to rise, only the richest dudes will drive cars. Cars will regain their rightful place as 'babe' wagons. In this eco-friendly age where wheatgrass is the new cool, clean-cut kindergarten nerd Archie hangs up his teacher hat and goes home to work on a new invention – a car powered by the green slime itself.

Archie stops for supplies at the vegan store where a prim and proper bespectacled girl sells him wheatgrass while sketching artistic pornography ("your cum tastes like tofu") under the counter. Across the yard at the meat stall is a more predatory chick whose intentions are more openly high octane kinky sex. As they compete for his affection, Archie accidentally discovers that blood added to wheatgrass makes the engine work a treat. He even dispenses with the wheatgrass. Archie is a vegan, so killing small animals causes him great emotional anguish. Even more when they won't stay still. But having bagged a few quadrupeds there is even more anguish when he realise the car wants human blood or nothing.

Blood Car is a crisply-made, ultra low-budget movie that has been compared to the Troma films or those of Russ Meyer and John Waters. Low-tech special effects, bouncing bosoms, and hilariously tongue-in-cheek. For the first hour, I was spellbound by its audacity, the thumbing at convention, and never knowing where it was going next. The sight of Archie on a bike, wielding an axe and chasing two FBI men, reminded me of the luckless cyclist hero-nerd from Peter Jackson's early movie, Braindead. But then it struck me. Blood Car was made by talented people who knew their trash movies. And good lighting. And good cinematography. But it was also a mish-mash of many styles. It lacks consistency. Acting is (at best) caricature. And for all the gore, sex and violence it still lacks bite. Political satire here entertains rather than protests. Blood Car's limits are tamely within those defined by the Meyer and Waters it emulates. It had no real axe to grind against Hollywood as does Troma. It reeks of clever students showing off.

But although I was ultimately disappointed, I was still entertained for over an hour. It was the low-brainer I needed after an overly-serious and slightly soul-destroying morning. Like the girl who flashes her tits at Archie to get a lift, and is then lured into the boot to see the puppies, I had been happily hooked. It would sound mean to say I'd been had. Even if it's true. And, like me, I bet you want to look in the boot . . .

This is one of the funniest movies I have EVER seen!!! Granted it's low budget, the whole concept of the movie is ridiculous but Katie Rowlett was hilarious in the movie.

"Why don't you go home and write a Haiku about my box!" I had to pause the movie because I was laughing so hard.

The ending was kind of weak but overall its one of those great B movies where you say.... I wouldn't change ANYTHING about that movie. Great movie all around.

It's obviously not for everyone but for those millions of us out there that love silly comedy horror movies like Army of Darkness style then you will love this movie.

It's not often you laugh so hard at a scene where a guy tries to kill a puppy with a BB GUN!!! We all know thats totally going to work....LOL Watch it. Laugh at it. That's it. You are getting what you ask for in this movie. Blood Car. Ridiculous. Hilarious. Blood. Car.

Schlock at its modern best. What made those 70s horror films great were their serious intent delivered with such camp. That is what works for "Blood Car." This indie film, directed by Alex Orr and starring Anna "My Girl" Chlumsky and Mike Brune is a fun romp into the camp of yesteryear, serving up generous portions of horror, humor, and political satire of our current affairs. Does it all work together? You bet! "Blood Car" bested my expectations with its over-the-top acting, a silly yet disturbingly plausible story (plausible in the most twisted of minds), and some brilliant editing work considering its indie film budget.

The film is set in the near future where gas costs hundreds of dollars to fill a tank. Only the most elite can afford to drive a car, making the cheapest of cars appear luxury if only for the fact that they can be powered down a road. The story concerns an elementary school teacher who seeks a method of clean-burning fuel to use in place of gasoline. As our teacher Archie loves his wheat grass, he tries to use it as an alternate fuel. During the experiment, he cuts himself, spilling blood into the mixture that makes an engine run. It's only later that he realizes its the blood and not the wheat grass creating the combustion. When he finds that the source runs out quickly, he abandons his life-loving peaceful ways and goes onto a killing spree to keep his car running. Plenty of humor runs between all the pseudo-violence as our poor anti-hero just wants to make good for the world, while spilling human blood. It was a joy to watch on the big screen and brought back memories of my drive-in days. (Yes, I'm old enough to remember drive-ins. They were outdoor theaters which you drove your car into, and... never mind.) Definitely a must-see destined for the cult-classic home DVD libraries.

I have to say that I harbored absolutely zero expectations to the 2007 movie titled "Blood Car", as I happened to stumble upon it here in 2024 and sitting down to watch it. In fact, I had never even heard about the movie.

Writers Hugh Braselton, Alex Orr and Adam Pinney put together a cheesy script, no doubt about it. But there was just something that worked about the movie, because it was so far out there and silly. I mean, you got to appreciate when someone comes up with these outrageous ideas for movie scripts.

I wasn't familiar with a single actress or actor on the cast list. For a movie such as this, then the acting performances were actually fair. I will say that the hilarious dialogue, especially the dialogue from Denise (played by Katie Orr) was so hilarious that it more than made up for the shortcomings of some of the acting performances.

The effects in the movie were simplistic, but actually worked out well enough. You will not find yourself sitting down to be blown away by a myriad of impressive special effects here.

When Archie and Denise made it to the barbecue sauce, I have to say that the cinematography died. That hand-held, shaky camera that the movie suddenly opted to shift to just simply didn't work for me. And it was a rather horrible scene to sit through.

"Blood Car" is a fun little low-budget movie with a somewhat different storyline. Give it a gander if you enjoy movies that deviate from the usual cinematic stuff, you might just like what director Alex Orr has put together back in 2007. While I did manage to sit through he 82 minute runtime of the movie, I can honestly say that this is not a movie that will grace my screen a second time.

This movie is so wonderfully strange that it was actually well-worth sitting down and watching.

My rating of "Blood Car" lands on a six out of ten stars.