Flavor of Love

I had the misfortune of having only one English language channel at my Croatian hotel. It was either another game of rummy with my wife or a reality show I hadn't seen before. Flavor of Love is a cynical, contrived and utterly useless show. Anyone with half a brain (obviously not their target audience) can see that the scenarios are faked, scripted and unreal. One show has a contestant serving Flavor Flav a raw chicken with vegetables stuffed out of its orifices and feigning innocence and ignorance. This show is an insult to Americans and women. I watched this on MTV Europe as were millions of other Europeans. The message we received was that Americans are insincere, vulgar, materialistic and phony among other things. Where is the pride of the contestants ? They made American women look shallow and willing to do anything in the pursuit of celebrity. Seemingly, their ten seconds of fame is worth the indignity of parading around like gold digging sluts.

The first time I saw the promos for this show, I swear I thought I was gonna have a coronary and die on the spot! I could not believe that all these gorgeous women were going crazy over somebody as hideous-looking as Flavor Flav! I mean, the guy has perhaps the ugliest-looking face since Rodney Dangerfield, he talks like his mouth is always filled with marbles, and he still wears that God-awful over-sized clock. If I was a woman (that's a huge "if", by the way), I wouldn't be caught dead on this abomination of a show. This is just one more reason why nobody with an IQ higher than 90 watches VH-1 anymore. Oh, well, there's always "Celebrity Fit Club" and "Breaking Bonaduce".

They are showing the whole first episode of this on the vh1 TV website Vspot at VH1.com. I liked it because it is like the bachelor but with Flavor Flav. In truth he isn't as nuts as he was probably because he is clean from doing crack. I think his charm will shine thru and that will be the real reward for whatever chick gets with him and also for the viewers. I personally hope he is smart and doesn't just choose some broad who is SOLELY in it for the money. On the other hand its kinda demeaning for the chicks but I guess thats how dating is anyway, there's always a level of either a) giving up your dignity or b) compromising the dignity of whoever your pursuing romantically.

I think this show just proves once again, VH1 is destined to do whatever they can to make rap music look bad, especially for white people (who are their main audience). Usually, a show like "the bachelor" which this is, is centered around a guy who is rich, or good-looking, or famous in recent memory. Though I got the utmost respect for Public Enemy, Flavor Flav is none of the above that I can think of, and isn't one of the first guys anyone thinks of for being the guy on this kind of show that a bunch of women want to get with. (^u^)

On the other hand, it looks like all the contestants on the show are either people already in the entertainment industry who are just doing the show for exposure, and all the rest are hookers & strippers.

What I can say so far of what I notice pretty clearly:

-Though Smiley is one of the best-looking women on the show (at least from the waist-up anyway), you already know she isn't serious about even winning this event to really be involved with Flav. Remember the episode when they were all in the car about to go play with the kids in the park? When Flav said he wants 4 more kids before he dies, her face just CHANGED into a state of shock! She did NOT want to be there after he said that, and it was funny as hell! That added with the fact she is a personality on WWE or whatever it is, you already know she wouldn't be trying to really be with Flav even if she won. She's just wasting the show's time by being there. If Flav does all this for this show, he should at least end up with a girl who would actually be his woman and want what he wants.

-Looking at the end of the episode when that one chick made that nasty-ass chicken, I looked at how Flav greeted the women he kept. When he gave Red Oyster her clock, they hugged and he was slappin and grabbin on that booty. Makes me wonder if she's screwing him behind closed doors away from the camera in those private meetings when she's telling him secrets about everyone else on the show - from the way they greeted each other, it looks obviously like that's what's been going on and could be a reason why they seem closer than some of the others. (I still like how she dissed hottie about "don't make it about you bitch" even though it was bold as hell to do that - hahaha!, then again, hottie isn't the type to fight back so i guess..)

-New York is unstable and crazy. she is probably one of the serious people on the show about being with him for real, but too insane to make the investment being with. like is said before, 2 types of people on this show: people in entertainment just trying to get exposure, and hookers & strippers. guess which one she probably is? (haha) she's probably screwing him behind closed doors too which is why she made it so far on the show.

When it's all said and done, it would be cool if Goldie ended up winning the whole thing. She's the only girl that appears to be normal, and not an entertainer or a professional hoe.

(Hoopz is probably the other that is normal like Goldie is, but she really should raise her standards and get off the show, cause I don't believe her wasting herself on Flavor Flav. He's more into the dirty whores, which is why he kept Hottie with the big jugs after she made that nasty chicken but eliminated the other girl who was being for real)

I am not letting any cats out of the bag now that the show is over. I just felt I had to speak my peace on this travesty of a show. First of all I am not one to watch reality shows but my sister and brother in law asked me to turn to Flavor of Love because they found it hilarious. So I decide to give it a try. I couldn't believe women degrading themselves on national TV and really honestly saying they wanted to be with Flavor Flav or any man for that. When I turned and saw a few women that I had seen on other shows I wasn't sure how real this reality was. I know for sure that Smiley was on the WWE tryouts as a 2006 DIVA as Alexis. I also wondered how could Flavor Flav just pull a segment of Blind Date out of the air with Hottie (Shactar) on it. Coincidence, I think not? She is an actress as well. Also when Red Oyster received the phone call from her friend (her friend called her Sharon and her real name is Abigail).First of all how did she know that there was a message awaiting her? Also why would her friend leave such a distressing message and Red Oyster (Abigail)not immediately react? That was too obvious to be real. That was totally staged. Peaches (Kim) is an actress as well. Obviously not that great of an actress because she was gone after 3 episodes. So you had at least 4 actresses on the show. You had a nut case in (New York)Tiffany. The only ones I believe were real are Hoopz (Nikki) and Goldie. Goldie was right when she was in the hotel with Flavor Flav and thought him being on top of her was "Gross"! It's like having a part human, part animal, part mythical creature on top of you. I would be scared that I might catch Mad Cow Disease or an STD. How disgusting!!!! I must admit in spite of all the phoniness, the show did keep me laughing. There was that part of me that wanted Hoopz to win because she is a real woman and New York was brash, brazen, cocky, overconfident and just plain crazy. She was definitely kept around for the drama factor. Hoopz is diverse and she kept herself real through the entire show. The other part of me (the woman) was saying why would anyone as beautiful as Hoopz or any woman in her right mind would want to be with a man that looks like a walking gargoyle, snickering like a Hyena, acting like he's on crack (is he)? touching, rubbing, kissing and feeling on them? On his date with Hoopz and his mother at the soul food restaurant he ordered pork chops, ox tails, macaroni and cheese, collard greens, rice, yams and etc. They show him eating all the time and he's still as skinny as a "bottle of ketchup" New Yorks mother said the funniest and truest line in the whole show when they were at the tennis court. (He's such a BAFFOON). I laughed so hard I almost hurt myself. Hoopz doesn't have to worry about Flavor Flav though because she can whip his behind at any time. She pushed his head down and held him under water in one episode when he was in the pool with her and in the final episode when they were swimming in the ocean in Mexico she suplexed him and body slammed him. She may have to beat up her Mom though since she was hitting on Flavor Flav right in front of her in one episode as well. Her Mom is probably closer to his age than Hoopz is. Hoopz is a 23 year old beautiful down to earth woman and Flavor Flav is a flirty dirty 46 year old whatever he was and a has been. I knew the show was fake because even as crazy as Flavor Flav is he couldn't be crazy enough to be with someone like New York (Tiffany). Although she probably would have been best for him because they are both cracked or possibly on crack based on their actions and attitudes. I hope she was an actress because if she is really that psycho she needs to be institutionalized. But I see her as all bark and no bite. She can curse great but she can't back it up. I'm with Hoopz. If Pumkin would have spit on me they would have picking she and her teeth up. Forget not getting a clock from Flav. Tick Tock I would have knocked off her block then hit her upside her head with the clock. Oh I wax so eloquently. New York (Tiffany) will go down in television history as the crazy psychotic woman, getting spit on (and I mean SPIT ON) by Pumkin, having sex and still getting kick out at the end. How embarrassing. I hope they paid her a lot of money to restore her dignity. The majority of the actresses on the show were terrible with the exception of Smiley(Alexis). She had the drama down pat with the whole Ex-Husband and the tears and the screaming "IF HE ASK ME TO STAY,I WILL, BECAUSE I WANT TO STAY! Give that girl an Emmy! Hoopz if you really are real and you want to be with William Drayton(Flavor Flav) may the good Lord be with you. I just think you are too hot of a MaMa to deal with the Drama, And way to smart, to deal with that OLD FART! Oh yes Hoopz, lose the gold teeth. Your smile is too pretty to be covered in those golden travesties. As Flavor Flav would say. Yo G! For Real, For Real!!!Yea Boyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. I'm Out! Oh, He's such a BAFFOON. Gotta Go.....I can't stop laughing.