Ulli Lommel's Zodiac Killer

Not that "a film by Ulli Lommel" filled me with hope, but I must confess that ZODIAC KILLER managed to sink beneath my lowest expectations. There is a recent trend among young filmmakers of utilizing digital video for their early projects, which is all well and good for giving these kids the opportunity to create work without spending all their money on expensive film stock. But many of these young filmmakers have also wised up to the notion of filtering the finished movie so that it appears qualitatively more like celluloid. The effect is never perfect, but it helps. Unfiltered digital video really only works for the "mockumentary" style, because it never looks like anything other than video. Therein lies the primary trouble with ZODIAC KILLER. Watching the movie feels like watching a daytime soap opera about a murderer. It does not feel like watching a movie. And what's even more unforgivable is that the Lommel is NOT a young filmmaker. He ought to know better. He ought to know that it's virtually impossible to generate horror (or even suspense!) on video. For the love of god this guy has been directing since the sixties! He may be the only director who has failed to improve over a forty year career in the business. And lucky us, he wrote the script too! So you can expect convoluted actions that mean nothing, unjustified behavior, and at least one truly pretentious plot element that will leave you utterly unsatisfied. Please, please miss this film. You'll thank me later.

This movie is bad. I don't just mean 'bad' as in; "Oh the script was bad", or; "The acting in that scene was bad".....I mean bad as in someone should be held criminally accountable for foisting this unmitigated pile of steaming crud onto an unsuspecting public. I won't even dignify it with an explanation of the (Plot??) if I can refer to it as that.I can think of only one other occasion in some 40-odd years of movie watching that I have found need to vent my spleen on a movie. I mean, after all, no one goes out to intentionally make a bad movie, do they? Well, yes. Apparently they do...and the guilty man is writer/director Ulli Lommel. But the worst of it is that Blockbusters is actually renting this to their customers! Be advised. Leave this crap where it belongs. Stuck on the shelf, gathering dust.

I'm not sure if this is the most incompetent horror movie ever made or a satire of unparalleled genius. As a long time fan of Ulli Lommel and his unique brand of film-making, I guess I should give him the benefit of the doubt. I would watch Zodiac Killer again in order to make a more informed decision but I'm afraid I might burst a lung by laughing too strenuously. Regardless of whether the film is intentionally comedic or not, the fact remains that Zodiac Killer has to be seen to be believed. I guess that is reason enough to hire it.

Zodiac Killer begins inauspiciously. Michael, a pretty typical psycho, works in a home for the elderly and overhears a man plotting to kill his grandmother. Michael takes it upon himself to be an avenging angel for the aged and blows the man away. It is only when reporters compare the shooting to the infamous and unsolved "Zodiac" murders that Michael decides to be become a Zodiac copycat and impersonate the Zodiac killer. Up until this point, I had assumed that this was going to be a typical zero budget slasher film but Ulli Lommel is nothing if not innovative. Instead, the film becomes something of a cinematic collage of flashbacks, stock footage, still photographs, interviews and recycled clips from old Ulli Lommel films.

In addition to the disconcerting and unusual story telling techniques, the film also clearly switches tone. I refuse to believe that the clips of war footage, interspersed between Michael's ranting about how serial killers are pursued by the authorities while soldiers are allowed to kill with impunity, could be anything other than satirical. The same goes for the hilarious e-mails Michael exchanges with Zodiac expert, Simon Vale. Michael begins his correspondence by describing his mental illness and asks for further details about the murders. This doesn't appear to bother Simon at all and before too long he is leaving long winded messages on Michael's mobile phone. The inane happenings continue with a series of mind boggling TV interviews, which I somewhat optimistically believe to be a parody of the cult of celebrity that surrounds many serial killers. I also hope that the actual murders are a send up of the unbelievable scenarios that pollute most horror films. For example, Michael breaks into a house wearing a gas mask and opens a cannister of nerve gas - while literally standing less than three metres away from two women, who rather amazingly fail to notice his presence. The scene where Michael hides behind a victim's couch and observes the man watching TV is as illogical as it is hilarious. The entire scenario with the pizza delivery girl is one of the funniest things I have seen. I really, really hope the humour was intentional.

The gore is generally quite poorly done, with the exception of the crime scene photographs which are genuinely disturbing. This is most likely due to the fact that they look remarkably similar to the actual images which appear in publications like "Bizarre" magazine. The acting is pretty appalling. Vladimir Maksic who plays Michael, is either the finest comedic actor of his generation or utterly abysmal. The film livens up every time that horror legend David Hess makes an appearance, even though his performance is so over the top that it verges on slapstick. The acting highlight is Ulli himself, who delivers an intriguing performance as Simon Vale. Ulli's direction is resourceful - to say the least. His mixed media approach works occasionally but just as often feels like unnecessary padding. However, Ulli has an undeniable style and I would be interested to see what he could do with a bigger budget. Maybe Ulli could give his classic "Boogeyman" the sequel it deserves.

Your enjoyment of this film will depend on whether you think Zodiac Killer is a clever send up of horror films and a satirical look at the media circus surrounding serial killers, or simply a phenomenally incompetent piece of garbage. Wherever the truth lies, I found the film strangely mesmerising. I wanted to hate it but I was too interested in discovering which depth the film would plummet to next. Love it or hate it, Ulli Lommel's film is undeniably different.

Zodiac Killer. 1 out of 10. Worst acting ever. No really worst acting ever. David Hess (Last House on the Left…. No the one from the seventies…. Rent it it's really good) is the worst of the bunch (Pretty stiff competition but he is amazingly god-awful.) One would be hard pressed to find a home movie participant with such an awkward camera presence. The film actually screeches to a stunning painful halt when he is on the screen.

Not that the film actually has any redeeming qualities for Mr. Hess to ruin. It is filmed with a home movie camera and by the looks of things a pretty old one complete with attached boom mike. No post production either. Come on there has to be some shovelware a five year old computer could use that could clean up this picture. Throw in bizarre stock footage pictures of autopsy's and aircraft carrier takeoffs and this is one visually screwed up picture. The autopsy pictures are interjected the way Italian cannibal films interject those god-awful real life animal killings. And the Navy footage is supposed to be some anti war statement (Cause we know all the bloodthirsty maniacs join the Navy) What in the world is Lion's Gate is doing releasing this garbage? It would embarrass Troma. The plot is about the Zodiac Killer (Last seen in Dirty Harry …. No the one from the seventies…. Rent it it's really good) Somebody gets shot in the stomach in LA and the cops assume the Zodiac Killer is back? Uh-huh. What can you expect from a movie that doesn't know that DSM IV is a book not a psychiatric disorder and where the young killer older man relationship resembles that of a congressional page and closeted congressman? Yeah eighties haircuts and production values meet a Nambla subplot. Sign me up.

I don't want to go off on a rant here, but.....this is the worst "film" I've ever seen. Worse than The Avengers. Incompetent directing, disjointed writing, and awful acting are the only consistent elements throughout. Shot on very cheap video, it looks like a high school project, but without the emotion. The lighting frequently looks like a single Sun-Gun. The sound is slightly better than a single mic on the camera, but everything else about this thing is just awful. The plot heads off in strange directions with no foundation or later resolution, the techie elements are patently absurd, and the editing looks worse than a rough cut. It's not even bad enough to be funny. It's just bad. BTW, the packaging is intentionally misleading.

Lion's Gate owes me $4.00.