18 Fingers of Death!

I went into seeing this with no idea of the concept & no notion of what I would be watching.

It was 4 house-mates & friends, along with myself. Total 5 people, all with vastly differing movie tastes to say the least. However there is one thing were were all unified on for once, it took us less than 30 minutes to decide to turn this movie off & save what few braincells we had that either thankfully slept thru this torture or didn't succeed at committing suicide in a rage against me for forcing them to acknowledge this trash.

Since I cant submit a rating of 0 for the movie, I was forced to give it a rating of 1, which in my opinion is 2 more than it deserves.

Save yourself the time wasted & the mental anguish & AVOID this movie!

Going by the previous comment here I thought this movie would be comical exploration into the kung-fu world. What a mistake that was! The only laughs I got were at the expense of the acting and the script (if there even was a script, often it felt as though the entire movie was being ad-libbed by a first-year college movie class). Although there are numerous references to classic kung-fu movies, they don't come across as a tongue-in-cheek homage, but rather a pathetic attempt to legitimise the meaningless content. There are plenty of low brow jokes which only serve reinforce the weak script and poorly written characters, with nothing original or witty as a saving grace. A waste of time & money.

I really couldn't see it all at once, toked me 3 days...the thing that kept me seeing it was that at times humor was kinda nice and made me laugh but the fart things and some childish humor just toked it all away...and left me wonder why is Pat Morita there, was sad to see him in the movie...Lorenzo Lamas made me laugh imitating "Antonio Bandanas". Most are bad actors, the images are like a pure home made video...and by GOD the gayness of some jokes are really bad! O.o I can never(i think) give 1 out of 10 to a movie cause there's always some effort and some money and time spent doing one. So i give it 3/10 for the jokes that actually made me laugh.

I really, really wanted to enjoy this movie but it just didn't seem to gel. A movie spoof is supposed to be funny, not make you sorry for the people appearing in it. Not to mention sorry for the people who financed it because you pray they can somehow make their money back and yet you know they probably won't. A movie lives and dies by it's script and for a comedy spoof this just wasn't very funny at all. And I agree with the 2 other people who said the "fart fight" featuring Lorenzo Lamas was the definite low point. Flatulence on film was funny when Mel Brooks did it in the classic "Blazing Saddles" but that was a long, long time ago. And how disappointing to see a film with the smoking hot Robin Shou and veteran Don "The Dragon" Wilson and neither one of them fights?? Just much too brief cameos for both, truly a shame. Might have helped things a bit here, at least there would have been some great fighting to make up for the lack of great comedy.

Do not spend your money on this movie. I love mockumentaries and potty humor but I did not even crack a smile during this entire film. I gave it 2 stars 'cuz Pat Morita was in it. I am still baffled at how this kind of crap gets backing and then money is spent to promote it, and then it's distributed, etc. I'm all for up and coming talent but keep the small budget crap on the shelf for art's sake. Release it later if the director or an actor/actress makes it big later on. Why do I keep falling for this crap. Those who wrote positive reviews must be very very brainless or a part of the film in some way.

If your friend spends his/her money on this move...kung fu his butt and don't watch this. My eyes still burn. Help me.