Triads, Yardies & Onion Bhajees!

We bought this film thinking and believing it was going to be a great British gangster film- comparing itself to Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, we have yet to discover the comparison! The story/plot seemed like a winning formula- we were very wrong. The acting other than Dave Courtney was atrocious, and the most laughable one being that of the main character/hardman Singh. We couldn't take it seriously we found it all so bizarre and not at all close to that of real life gangsters and gangs, I can't go any deeper into that without giving some of the plot away. We presumed it was filmed in black and white as it looked even worse in colour. Had this film been more realistic and better actors used-not so wooden and reading from a script it could have been enjoyable.We had to laugh at the end that we had sat and watched it all. Do not be sucked in to the false advertising on the cover a complete waste of time.

Wow how bad? very bad. The whole thing looks like it was shot on a 1990's hand held camcorder from Argos. I can only image they had colour temperature issues (tungsten/daylight) so switch to b&w problem solved. It adds nothing to the film. The Acting is well awful very forced which combined with the bad editing that exaggerates the bad acting. Again the editing some scenes seem like the whole disappearing rabbit trick, actors suddenly appearing. I read the bad reviews but have waited years to see it. The fact it was "banned" gives it some creditability until you realise it was probably banned for being crap. The violence is laughable if anyone seriously thinks this is what is secretly happening behind the closed doors of London then you must be very stupid. Yardies scene WTF. Its just terrible. Still got another 30 minutes to go, time to go in the bin. Save yourself and your time. To many great British gangster movies just this is not one of them.

The 2000s were full of LOCK, STOCK AND TWO SMOKING BARREL rip-offs as producers and directors found themselves keen to replicate the success of Guy Ritchie's career. Few succeeded, and when you see the quality of a film like TRIADS, YARDIES & ONION BHAJEES! You can see why. This is a totally terrible, cheap, amateurish attempt at a gangster movie, telling the story of warring gangs. Every word is stilted, every performance diabolical, and the whole thing is aggressively racist. It was made in black and white for no real reason, and bullet hits are animated by some of the worst computer graphics you'll ever see. A film to truly avoid like the plague.

poor acting and really bad quality of image ,and i was so bored i have to say, the cover of this DVD made me to buy it ,and i understand its a really low budget the film and that it was shot very fast ,anyway to compare this film at lock stock its really A joke , yes the plot and idea was great and had great potential especially with some of those location who look great,,but they chose really bad actor and was not engaging at all ,,its pity i had great expectation with this film ,,and i can only tell i have to give them 10 out of 10 for the marketing and the cover of their DVD will sell a lot of DVD on hmw ..but it was a waste of my money buying this bad film ,

I had very high hopes for this film. It had won the best black and Asian film category at Cannes so i thought there must be something in it that warranted such high acclaim. I downloaded the trailer and viewing it made me even more excited about watching this film. The trailer was fantastic and made the film look like it was the best film ever made. I finally got the chance to view it at the Metro Cinema in Derby. I took my wife along with me. One of my best friends from school was one of the actors in the film, he played a character called Rocky. I had excitedly told my wife how good this film was going to be so you can imagine my disappointment when i finally did get to see it. I just didn't get it. The picture was grainy but i put that down to it being an artistic film. The acting was poor but i put that down to inexperience. The story was sketchy and by then i had ran out of excuses. It was so poor that i walked out before the film had ended. I never do that normally but i really was not bothered how this film ended as it would have made no difference to my overall opinion of it. If only the film was as good as the trailer, it would have been a classic. Sorry my friend, i'm just being honest.