S.I.C.K. Serial Insane Clown Killer

This was, so far, the worst movie I have seen in my entire life, and I have seen some REALLY bad movies. I saw this movie at my local video store, and the cover looked like it could be a decent horror movie. Little did I know that the cover would be the best part of the movie. Where to start? The filming of the movie was scattered and boring. At one point, there is a one-minute scene of no one talking, just a car driving to a ranch on a normal sunny day. Nothing happened, they just drove in silence. The whole movie is boring, with annoying, unbelievable dialogue and basically no plot to speak of. If you rent this movie, watch it with some friends and it might make a good comedy. Otherwise, when you see this movie, run.

S.I.C.K. really stands for So Incredibly Crappy i Killed myself. There was absolutely no acting to speak of. The best part of the whole production was the art work on the cover of the box.The budgeting of this movie was sufficient. The filming was sub sesame street. The production looks like that of the underground filming for mob hits. The props used in this movie were stolen from a clothing store. The ending was so predictable you should fast forward to the last 5 minutes and laugh. If there is a book out there for this movie I'm sure it's better. I would avoid this at all costs. I did enjoy the intimate scenes they made the whole movie worth it. just kidding.

Okay.. where to begin... My friends and I watched this movie at a party. The cover of the DVD case looked promising, especially because one of my friends is scared of clowns. 10 minutes into the movie is a flashback that has nothing at all to do with the movie. I still don't know who the woman is or why she would ask a question like "what did you do?", when she can see plainly that he cut her in several different places. The entire movie appears to be shot with a camcorder, making it look like a Spanish soap opera. As for the actors.. I'm willing to bet that all that was required of them was to be able to speak English. The acting was the only thing "sick" about this movie.

Plot: Brandon Walker invites Mark and Susan(a married couple) to stay with him at his family's place for the weekend. They stop at a bar/restaurant and pick up Denise(some random slutty hitchhiker)and the girls invite her to stay with them. All is well until morning when they find Susan has gone missing. They search for her and leave a note which reads: Susan- went to look for you when you get back stay put. -Mark.. they search for about 10 minutes and come back. Oh I forgot to mention that they find several decapitated/mutilated dolls just about everywhere..a bit creepy at first..but after awhile just gets annoying. When they come back they find the note missing from the door. Mark states "oh i bet Susan came back, shes always doing stuff like this" (as if it happens all the time) they try to start the car(which of course has been tampered with.) When it gets dark Mark decides to go look for poor Susan again ... Denise goes with him.. and they start to talk about stuff an of course.. he screws her although they were supposed to be looking for his wife.

This is a very predictable movie.. the characters are clueless to the situation and are to stupid to get their asses out of there. It is a very low low low low budget movie.. the lowest of low.. if you want to watch this to see a scary clown.. don't... there is about 15 minutes of the clown killer who in-fact is a big fat man who when walking can somehow can catch up to an average size man who is sprinting. The clown in the movie is nothing like the clown on the DVD box, they bare no resemblance what so ever. DON'T WATCH THIS MOVIE IT MAY CAUSE YOU TO BREAK THINGS IN FRUSTRATION AND HATRED TOWARDS THE MOVIE

Lucky me. I got a sneak peak at this pathetic little shot-in-Texas 'horror' flick from Artisan Entertainment a week before it hit video store shelves and, let me tell you, I've rarely laughed so hard in my life! This is so bad it easily steals the title of 'Worst Killer Clown Movie' from the insufferably stupid Full Moon fiasco KILLJOY. From all indications, this was shot on DV and it doesn't really 'look' all that bad quality-wise for digital, but boy does it ever fail miserably in every other area where it counts!

The story (slight and cliche as it is) goes as follows... An extremely douchey executive (Ken Hebert, who also scripted and co-produced with the director) takes skeptical co-worker Tracy (Amanda Watson) and horny married couple Mark and Susan (Hank Fields and Chris Bruck) along on a weekend getaway to a secluded cabin '12 miles' from the nearest town. On the way there, they pick up a bitchy/slutty hitchhiker (Melissa Bale) in a bar and end up at their destination where a nightly campfire tale about a murderous clown stalking the very same wooded area comes true when each of the foul-mouthed, pot-smokin' 'friends' disappears one-by-one, with only mutilated doll parts left behind to tell the tale of their fates.

The killer clown doesn't even show up in the film until near the end and it looks nothing like the demonic depiction of it on the video box aside from being morbidly obese. It basically spends an hour prancing around in the woods, chopping up wood and blabbing nursery rhymes. I cannot say enough bad things about the cast, especially the two guys and the hitchhiker chick, who either deliver their insipid dialogue with a bare minimum of enthusiasm or overact at the most inappropriate times. Doesn't really help that the dialogue is awful. I could go on for days on how inept this film is, how many continuity errors there are, how many pointless nature / animal shots are hilariously cut in at the strangest times and how amateurish the whole production is, but I'll just sign off by pointing out the whole package is quite a laugh riot in that Boy-This-Sucks kind of way.

Also noting that the film has been released here in the US as S.I.C.K. (SERIAL INSANE CLOWN KILLER). It's currently catalogued under its (original title) of GRIM WEEKEND.

Score: 1 out of 10

I really don't even know what to say about this movie. I apologize for not following my usual format, but this is a warning to everyone who happens to stop by and read this :

PLEASE, AVOID THIS MOVIE AT ALL COSTS!

I cannot stress this enough. Acting was terrible, horrendous, I have found "acting" in adults movies better than this film. The music? Think late night Cinemax. Exactly. Clowns? Where are the evil clowns? Oh my, this would be the ONLY time in my life I can utter the words " I KNOW I could make a better film than this one.

Rating? NOTHING! It gets a big, fat, nothing. A bomb, a turkey, call it what you want. If you have been a bad little boy or girl this year than you may just find this movie in your stocking, although coal has more value than this movie!