Calamity Jane

Calamity Jane (1999)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

Another hardcore effort from director Joe D'Amato. This one is set in the Wild West as our title character tries to get her tongue on any man or woman in town. Again, I'm not the one to be reviewing this type of thing but compared to other films from the director, this one is able to be a tad bit more erotic and there's some nice humor in a few of the scenes.

Director Joe D'Amato will always be remembered for his horror films like BEYOND THE DARKNESS and ANTROPOPHAGUS as well as his long running Emanuelle series with Laura Gamser. After the Italian horror market dried up, D'Amato had a comeback with the softcore ELEVEN DAYS ELEVEN NIGHTS, which eventually led to the director doing porn titles. The director had previously mixed sex and horror in such titles as PORNO HOLOCAUST and EROTIC NIGHS OF THE LIVING DEAD but those films were a long way off from his later day porn.

The English-dubbed American release of D'Amato's CALAMITY JANE probably represents the language it would have appeared in had it been made on film for theatrical release back in the day. Unfortunately this all-sex junker has no action (Western action as opposed to XXX action) and virtually no plot.

Missy, who had a decent American porn career before becoming another casualty (drug overdose), is less than riveting in the title role. Opening scene is lesbian action, with no attempt whatsoever to establish the Western genre or plot.

Kinky Joe has Calamity about to shove her long barreled gun into a vagina, but reverts to having her using a glass dildo instead (instantly recalling the classic scene of Janine Lindemulder in Andrew Blake's HIDDEN OBSESSIONS).

With hokey Southern accent dubbing, Missy portrays a bank robber/brothel madam. Chintzy format consists of cast having sex dressed in Western costumes -that's the extent of the "Western" here.

A flashback has Rocco Siffredi as a Confederate soldier (yeah, right) with a stupid accent, having sex with Missy. Film's climax is a series of d.p.'s -first for a brunette girl and then for Missy.

This was evidently made when Joe was starring Rocco in the better-known, but equally bad pair of OUTLAWS Westerns, with overlapping casts. Even CALAMITY JANE has a sequel.

As with many (not all, but a majority) of D'Amato's XXX efforts, nothing ventured and nothing gained.