Natürlich blond 2

Although I recognize the fact that I'm a guy and shouldn't like chick flicks anyway, Legally Blonde 2 was ridiculous on so many levels that after watching the movie I had to lower my head in shame.

The first LB movie, while not very funny, was still entertaining to watch because it actually had effort put into the storyline. It was interesting to see a fashion-obsessed blonde in pink apparently not fitting in at Harvard law school. They tried the same approach with LB2, only with her walking into congress buildings wearing her all pink outfits. However, since we've already seen that attempt at humor in the first movie, it just wasn't anything special.

Aside from that, the plot outline was horrible. Basically, Elle Woods (Witherspoon) is having an upcoming wedding where she plans to invite the mother of her pet dog. She discovers that the dog's mother is in a lab, where they were testing fingernail polish on the dog's nails. Elle got sad and was like 'I am going to go to DC and make it illegal for them to test on animals!' The viewer, however, doesn't really care, realizing that putting nail polish on a dog's nails really isn't that big of a deal, but hey.

I'm not trying to sound mean, but I just can't really think of anything good about this movie. Every single joke used in the movie was either not funny or recycled from the first one. The entire concept of the plot is just retarded. It even seemed Reese was half-assing her acting job through the movie, doing even worse than she did in the first film. Nobody else in the movie will be nominated for any Oscars, either.

It just seemed that some filmmaker wanted to cash in from the first movie's success, knowing that people will pay money to see this movie just because the first one was popular. All of the production team's effort went into marketing and hype and they just didn't put enough into the actual movie itself.

2 out of 10

Unfortunately, this film does not live up to its antecedent, which was very enjoyable. The problem is not with the cast, but with the script. It lacks the humor or the heart that made the first film funny and stirring. This is a real disappointment, I'm sure, to so many fans who wanted to root for Elle Woods again.

Perhaps if Elle had had a truly troublesome issue to overcome, something to add weight to the drama (which is absent in this film), viewers would have someone to cheer for. This film had all the gravitas of a Barbie playdate.

There can be little doubt, this movie is an inferior follow-up to Legally Blonde. Too many characters are recycled and made to look cute, but it doesn't work as well as when it was fresh. Still, Reese Witherspoon has created in 'Elle Woods' a character that is just fun to watch. She never stays down long, always picking herself up with a fresh approach until she achieves her goal. I look at it like a 'Roadrunner' cartoon, but with real people. It is silly and implausible, but funny. In this case the 'bad guys' are the US Congress in a parody of it's habit of making backroom deals and taking care of supporters to guarantee reelection, even if nothing is done to help constituents. Elle Woods finds that animals are used to test cosmetics, and her quest is to get a law passed that will make it illegal. Nothing more than cute, funny fluff.

That a film sequel will invariably fail to meet the standards of its predecessor is nearly axiomatic. For every brilliant sequel like 'Aliens' or 'Godfather: Part II', there are dozens of painfully lame successors. This is hardly a surprise, yet it is our own unerring tendency to flock, lemming-like, to sequels that insures their continued existence. Sequels make money, and that's a bad thing.

Take 'Legally Blonde 2'. Please.

By way of defense, let me point out that it isn't all that easy to find a movie that will entertain two adults, a 15 year old boy, and a 12 year old girl. Our hopes weren't high when we rented LB2 a couple of weekends ago; however, we all agreed that we had enjoyed the original movie, or at least hadn't actively hated it. That perky little Reese Witherspoon – how can you not kinda like her, huh?

After seeing LB2, I will unreservedly credit it with one thing: it provided a rallying point for my often-scattered family. We were steadfast, united in our complete and utter loathing for this execrable movie. Beyond that questionable achievement, however, I'm not sure there's anything positive that can be said about this film.

As virtually every other reviewer on the planet has noted, the original 'Blonde' had some amusing moments, most of which were supplied by Ms. Witherspoon, who managed to inject the character of Elle Woods with a believable combination of ditziness and sweet charm. Also bolstering the original film was co-star Jennifer Coolidge, who played her dim-bulb shtick to perfection as Elle's beautician friend Paulette. Of course it was a by-the-numbers plot line as predictable as Oregon rain, but Witherspoon, et al played it lightly and for laughs and it worked.

The sequel, however, is an appalling mélange of preachiness, offensive stereotypes, and patently ludicrous plot devices. 'Legally Blonde' made points by taking a helium-weight, bubbleheaded rich girl and making her into a sympathetic character. In LB2, Elle is an annoying dipshit whose breathless naivete and hyperactive adventures are simply painful to endure.

There's no real point in enumerating all the faults of this movie. To do so would be to grant it more thought than evidently went into its creation. But I can't simply step away from one aspect of the film that I found both irritating and troubling. Viewers of the first film will no doubt remember Elle's Chihuahua, Bruiser. For reasons that are continually validated, I tend to hate cutesy cinematic animal sidekicks, and Bruiser was emphatically no exception. In LB2, however, Bruiser's sexuality becomes a repeated theme and convenient plot device. More specifically, we (and Elle) discover that Bruiser is…(wait for it)… gay.

Hilarity ensues, ad nauseum.

It's a damning testimony that 1) the writers of this movie were so desperate for script fodder that they came up with this stunningly lame idea in the first place;

2) that they play it so shamelessly for laughs; and 3) that certain plot twists depend on this fact. It's a stupid, stupid idea in a stupid, stupid movie.

Should I waste more of my time or yours decrying the utter waste of Jennifer Coolidge in this movie? What about Sally Field's humiliating role as Congresswoman Victoria Rudd? Bob Newhart's excruciating turn as the know-it-all hotel doorman cum political mentor. Finally, on a larger scale, should we discuss the massive suspension of disbelief that's required to even slightly believe a moment of this wretched film?

Nah.

I loved the original Legally Blonde, and I knew going into this movie that it wouldn't be as good as the original. My only solace lies in the thought that this could have been so much worse than it was.

First, LB2 relied too much on the Elle-Woods-Fish-Out-Of-Water plot. It should have portrayed the main character as being savvy enough to take advantage of the fact that her opponents always underestimated her. After all, she's been out of law school a couple of years already, surely she'd have learned that much, right?

Second, the plot itself was too contrived. There wasn't a single believable character in the show, and Witherspoon was just a caricature of the original movie's heroine.

But I still managed to enjoy most of the show. I even chuckled in a couple of scenes. But I winced at far too many other scenes, and the climactic speech to Congress was abominable.

I've seen worse remakes than this, but I think the producers missed an opportunity to make a good film instead of a knock-off.