Invitation to Hell

This is one of those no-budget movies that may have been sort of cool back I the day because less people were doing them due to not having access to the equipment to pull off such a production. Thanks to improvements in technology and reduction in costs, a growing number of no-talents make boring movies like this for why, exactly? Because they can, I assume. No action, lame gore, horrible dialogue and acting, and only glimpse of nudity makes this thing a chore to watch. There's a certain charm to old movies like this and I usually give them a bit of a pass just for nostalgia's sake, but I can't think of anything nice to say about this one--it's pretty much the bottom of the barrel.

And then there's the sound quality issues. Considering the rarity of this film, if you are unfortunate enough to run across it, odds are it will be that bootleg that went into distribution a few years ago and the sound will be unlistenable and almost unintelligible in parts, just completely blown out. How to describe it? Imagine running the audio from your VCR into a cheap stereo, then running the output into a tape deck with the recording level up to 10, then running the output from the tape deck into a cheap guitar practice amp, sitting at the end of a 30' long by 2' wide drainage pipe with a microphone on the other end of it, the audio recorded from that microphone being used as the audio for this film. It's that bad.

Well, I read all the IMDb reviews (except that long one) including the ones specifically stating how awful the DVD bootleg is, with all the sound issues. I can handle it, I thought, being a lover of bad movies and all, and British Horror has rarely done me wrong. Besides, how much dialog can there be in a 54 (turned out to be 41) minute movie, anyway? Well, never mind that, and never mind the head-ache inducing roar which replaces most of the dialog, I have a serious lack of common sense, when searching for bad movies, Actually taking some of these IMDb reviews serious for a change would probably help, then I wouldn't have had to pay perfectly good money for an inconvenience from Hell, like Invitation to Hell.

A woman named Jackie is invited to a remote farmhouse for a high school reunion/costume party, where it's somehow discovered that she's still a virgin. This news hits everyones ears just fine, because they're all Satan worshipers, and were needing a virgin for their ceremony, so guess who's never allowed to leave...

If, for some reason, any of this sounds interesting, and If the DVD bootleg is your only option, then, For any chance at all of understanding anything, turn the TV down a little. Not exactly a diamond in the rough, but if I thought real hard I could probably think of a better analogy. Invitation To Hell actually isn't the worst movie I've ever seen (see The Chooper) but it very well may be in the bottom 5, although, it was a little gorier than I thought, which always deserves recognition. Invitation To Hell is a rather haunting, gloomy, horror movie, which can almost resemble quality, at times, so I feel bad giving this one such a low score, but if you ever see it, you'll probably wonder why the hell anyone would actually write about such an insignificant obscurity, much less, have the nerve to not give it a one. Just, something about British horror, I guess. For something more entertaining from England, I would recommend anything from Vampyres to Shaun Of The Dead, but if you're like me and have a hard time making a sensible decision, then I would highly recommend Invitation To Hell. 3/10

This is a no budget British horror film. Allegedly made for £50, whether that is true or not it sure looks like it.

A young woman goes to a fancy dress party and finds she is to be sacrificed as part of a satanic cult.

The film is influenced by classics like The Exorcist and has some slasher elements like a knife through the throat (best gore effect in the film).

The budget shows and the film looks like it may have been shot on VHS or Hi-8 as it doesn't have the clarity of 16 or 35mm. The film first appeared on VHS tape with the director's other film The Last Night. I was convinced this was a video nasty, but it's a pre-cert that was never re-released in the UK. It does have a DVD release in USA. This film is not recommended but it is a rare curiosity of British horror.

Michael J. Murphy or MJM went onto write and direct a series of straight to video cheapies in various genres: slasher, sex, fantasy. He died in 2015.

Laura invites her college friend Jacky out to her country estate for a costume party.What Jacky does not know is that she is a pawn in a demonic game.That evening she is drugged and taken out to what appears to be a black magic altar.The next morning she awakens with claw-like scratches on her legs and,when she tries to escape,finds she is trapped in this location.But why are her friends keeping her here and who do they truly serve?Pretty boring and drawn-out horror flick which lasts only 50 minutes or so.There are some wonderfully odd and surreal moments plus some nasty gore on display.The acting is very bad,but if you are into micro-budget horror cinema give this one a swirl.5 satanic farms out of 10.

Greetings And Salutations, and welcome to my review of Invitation To Hell; before launching into my critique, here's a breakdown of my ratings:

Story - 0.75 Direction - 0.50 Pace - 0.50 Acting - 0.75 Enjoyment - 1.00

TOTAL - 3.50 out of 10

One of the foremost drawbacks of the eighties for movie watchers was the video camera. Video players were an outstanding and life-changing invention - for once, instead of going to the movies, you could go to friends or stay home and watch a film. But any numpty with a camera could shoot a motion picture and find somebody to fund distribution. And that is what appears to have happened with Invitation To Hell.

The synopsis of the story is rather substantial. Sadly the writer wasn't skilled enough to build the outline into a fully-fledged tale of horror. There needed to be more details and believable characters. For example, a scene where the two old friends meet and one invites the other to a party would have anchored the evil twist in the invite's tail better than having the woman just turn up. More background on the evil inhabiting the farm would also pull the audience in more. There's not enough meat on the story's bones to make it fulfilling.

Lamentably, the writer also directed the picture, and his skills are as weak as the scripting. Blissfully, however, he does keep all the scenes well lit. There is even one impressive special effects sequence. The demon knifes one of the farmworkers to a bedroom wall, crucifix style, then pulls the heart from their chest. It's not the best FX, but for this low a budget, it's bloody magnificent. Regretfully, the rest of the camera work is well below par. There are scenes where people talk, but their mouths are closed tight. But worst of all is the meandering pace. The film only lasts three-quarters of an hour, but it feels much, much, much longer.

Ah, now we get to the acting, and it's as bad as the writing and direction. A good cast could have made this drivel watchable. The cast is so wooden in their delivery, that I could have gone outside and watched the trees in the garden and gotten a better performance.

So with a sad heart, I suggest you all miss this picture and do something more interesting with your lives: Like training a snail to race. Invitation To Hell can't even be called a B-Movie, it is that horrendous - there aren't even any unintentionally funny moments. I took the bullet on this one so you don't have to.

Please feel free to visit my Absolute Horror lists to see where I ranked Invitation To Hell - and to find a more enjoyable viewing experience.

Take Care & Stay Well.