Invitation to Hell

This is one of those no-budget movies that may have been sort of cool back I the day because less people were doing them due to not having access to the equipment to pull off such a production. Thanks to improvements in technology and reduction in costs, a growing number of no-talents make boring movies like this for why, exactly? Because they can, I assume. No action, lame gore, horrible dialogue and acting, and only glimpse of nudity makes this thing a chore to watch. There's a certain charm to old movies like this and I usually give them a bit of a pass just for nostalgia's sake, but I can't think of anything nice to say about this one--it's pretty much the bottom of the barrel.

And then there's the sound quality issues. Considering the rarity of this film, if you are unfortunate enough to run across it, odds are it will be that bootleg that went into distribution a few years ago and the sound will be unlistenable and almost unintelligible in parts, just completely blown out. How to describe it? Imagine running the audio from your VCR into a cheap stereo, then running the output into a tape deck with the recording level up to 10, then running the output from the tape deck into a cheap guitar practice amp, sitting at the end of a 30' long by 2' wide drainage pipe with a microphone on the other end of it, the audio recorded from that microphone being used as the audio for this film. It's that bad.

Laura invites her college friend Jacky out to her country estate for a costume party.What Jacky does not know is that she is a pawn in a demonic game.That evening she is drugged and taken out to what appears to be a black magic altar.The next morning she awakens with claw-like scratches on her legs and,when she tries to escape,finds she is trapped in this location.But why are her friends keeping her here and who do they truly serve?Pretty boring and drawn-out horror flick which lasts only 50 minutes or so.There are some wonderfully odd and surreal moments plus some nasty gore on display.The acting is very bad,but if you are into micro-budget horror cinema give this one a swirl.5 satanic farms out of 10.

Well, I read all the IMDb reviews (except that long one) including the ones specifically stating how awful the DVD bootleg is, with all the sound issues. I can handle it, I thought, being a lover of bad movies and all, and British Horror has rarely done me wrong. Besides, how much dialog can there be in a 54 (turned out to be 41) minute movie, anyway? Well, never mind that, and never mind the head-ache inducing roar which replaces most of the dialog, I have a serious lack of common sense, when searching for bad movies, Actually taking some of these IMDb reviews serious for a change would probably help, then I wouldn't have had to pay perfectly good money for an inconvenience from Hell, like Invitation to Hell.

A woman named Jackie is invited to a remote farmhouse for a high school reunion/costume party, where it's somehow discovered that she's still a virgin. This news hits everyones ears just fine, because they're all Satan worshipers, and were needing a virgin for their ceremony, so guess who's never allowed to leave...

If, for some reason, any of this sounds interesting, and If the DVD bootleg is your only option, then, For any chance at all of understanding anything, turn the TV down a little. Not exactly a diamond in the rough, but if I thought real hard I could probably think of a better analogy. Invitation To Hell actually isn't the worst movie I've ever seen (see The Chooper) but it very well may be in the bottom 5, although, it was a little gorier than I thought, which always deserves recognition. Invitation To Hell is a rather haunting, gloomy, horror movie, which can almost resemble quality, at times, so I feel bad giving this one such a low score, but if you ever see it, you'll probably wonder why the hell anyone would actually write about such an insignificant obscurity, much less, have the nerve to not give it a one. Just, something about British horror, I guess. For something more entertaining from England, I would recommend anything from Vampyres to Shaun Of The Dead, but if you're like me and have a hard time making a sensible decision, then I would highly recommend Invitation To Hell. 3/10

Maybe I'm just mad I spent five dollars on this instead of one dollar, but this film really displeased me. It's semi-known for it's gore and perhaps 'banned' status. I could not make out many of the details because the tape quality (Videoline Productions) was extremely poor, but the gore I saw was not exceptional. There were lots of guests over when I was watching this video and I was kind of embarrassed to be caught viewing some of the film's more boring moments. When there is no action on screen, the combination of bad acting, bad dialogue, and an uncompelling story make this movie a waste of time.

I know the sound is horrid if you can even call it sound and the acting is garbage again if you can call it acting. But this film does turn away most people and i like that about this film. By being a horrid mess it makes the film more personal to me. So when I watch it I feel like it is my own movie. Also for any one looking for the Wes Craven Invitation to Hell this is not it. That film is worse to watch than this. Even though the Craven movie can be heard it still sucks because Susan Lucici (or however you spell her name) should have stayed in Daytime Limbo where she belongs and not muddled up the great Wes Craven's movie. So if you want a film that takes a little work to watch Invitation to Hell (1982) is for you. trust me when your friends are at school talking about the latest Michael Bay crap fest you can blow them away with your knowledge of underground cinema. I know it worked for me.