Snatch: Schweine und Diamanten

I am a 33 year old woman in a flowered dress who doesn't drink, rarely swears, sleeps with a teddy bear, and has never raised a hand to anyone in my life. But I liked this movie a lot, and according to someone who wrote a review earlier, that makes me personally responsible for the violence in America. I'm sorry - I never intended to hurt anyone.

As for the movie - I usually get confused in fast-paced movies with so many characters, but when I watched Snatch I was able to keep all the characters straight pretty easily because each one had something unique and quirky about him. I liked that, and I liked the accents, and I liked the silly plot-twist humor, and I liked the dogs. The evil men were EVIL ("so evil you would call it the froo-its of the dev-eel" to quote Mike Meyers). The bumbling men were endearing. The music was great.

It was very violent (more so than Pulp Fiction, I think). Yet somehow it did not offend me and looking back at it I still laugh out loud.

Oh, and I never saw "Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels", for whatever that's worth.

This movie is perfect in all its categories: credits, sound track, production, casting, writing, photography, editing, acting, and direction. 10/10.

I was amazed with the freedom of the use of the camera. This movie will change the way movies are made. Slow-mo, stills, black and white, and color were all used to brilliant effect.

I must pick out specific actors who were just over the top - meaning 10+!

Jason Statham as "Turkish" is simply superb - a star of very high caliber. (You should see him in anything he made, and read my comment about John Carpenter's movie: "Ghosts of Mars.")

Alan Ford as "Brick Top" is terrifying - his forced speaking style made me think that he was chewing on the flesh of his previous victim.

Vinnie Jones as "Bullet Tooth Tony" is total tough head to foot tough - a walking brick wall - a marine for all seasons - none tougher.

Brad Pitt as "Mickey O'Neil" is utterly 110% convincing. I never liked Mr. Pitt's work before this - but this one totally sold me - he is as solid an actor as ever came out of Hollywood... and better!

Finally, Guy Ritchie should be recognized as a Michelangelo of film.

-LD

Read this review carefully, please.

First off, Snatch is an amazing movie in every sense of the word. There are very few movies made where the director obviously did not let one FRAME onto the screen without a reason, and Snatch is one of them. Nothing happens onscreen without it having an effect on the plot.

By now you know the plot, or plots. We follow a diamond-heist and the various characters trying to get theirs, at the same time following participants in an illegal boxing ring. The incredible part of the movie is how every scene ties in with the rest somehow, every character connects with the rest at least once.

There are complaints that the movie is confusing, or muddled. There are a lot of things that they don't tell you (such as what the dog has to do with anything, but he's a VERY important character), and that's a good thing. Too many movies force feed the audience its plot points (Think The Ring vs. Ringu, did we need the "How long could you survive down there all alone?" line?). Rather, we just watch occurrences, and have to piece together what ties everything together, the plot weaves together beautifully.

The cinematography and performances are fantastic as well. Even the soundtrack is perfect. The camera style during the fight scenes (slowdown/stop/go) makes it difficult to stop watching, the sound effects fit in quietly in the background without being overwhelming. And it will be IMPOSSIBLE to watch this movie without repeating many of the lines around your friends. I found myself saying "Zee Germans" and things like "It's not like he's a set of car keys, now is it?" quite a bit. Naturally, Brad Pitt's pikey is one of the most outlandish I've ever seen.

Summary: watch the movie, and don't expect to be TOLD everything, expect to have to pay attention.

A film about boxing, diamonds, gangsters pretending to be Jews, a fat getaway driver, a rather vicious dog and man eating pigs. Guy Richie has followed the success of Lock, Stock with an equally stunning and ambitious return just as Tarantino did with Pulp Fiction. The characters are so colourful they jump right off the screen, the dialogue so snappy you want to learn it by heart and the acting simply wonderful. Vinnie Jones reveals he can act and Brad Pitt shows that he is far more than a pretty face and could well win a best supporting actor oscar for his role as Irish Mickey. See this movie!!!!

The release of Tarantino's "Pulp Fiction" in 1994 prompted a schism in the staid gangster movie genre: the standard hallmarks - serious characters, gunfights, intrigue and damsels in distress - were enhanced with snappy dialogue, and gallows humour. The biggest change however was the introduction of the mobius strip-style plot line, where the concept of time is no longer linear, instead constantly folding in upon itself, flitting between past, present and future that forces the viewer to pay close attention lest they miss some subtle detail. Inevitably, numerous copycat films emerged that tried to capitalize on Tarantino's success, but it wasn't until 1998 when Guy Ritchie, an unknown British director, took on the challenge that a successor was found. Now Ritchie is determined to prove that his first time out wasn't a fluke.

Turkish is a young man with an entrepreneurial bent, who, when he's not running his gambling operation, manages bareknuckle boxers. Through a business deal gone wrong, he becomes acquainted with one Mickey O'Neil, a mumbling manic motor-mouthed piker who also happens to be a one-punch marvel. Turkish persuades Mickey to join his stable of fighters, but soon discovers that Mickey has his own agenda, and gets Turkish in trouble with the gangsters who run the underground boxing circuit. Other characters that become involved in the drama include a four-fingered degenerate gambler/jewel thief, a vicious boxing promoter, a gang of inept robbers, a polite hitman, a crazed Russian gun runner, a group of Irish gypsies, a crooked New York jeweler and a pugnacious pet. The common thread binding them all is a perfect diamond the size of a peach pit. If you aren't confused yet, you soon will be.

"Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels", Mr. Madonna's (Ritchie) first film, was shot on a small budget, with a no-name cast (except for football bad boy Vinnie Jones) and quickly became a rousing success at home and found receptive audiences abroad. While not a technically a sequel "Snatch" is stylistically very similar to "Lock, Stock…": Ritchie utilizes his trademark bombastic staccato sequences, and repeatedly bounces off on radical tangents to throw the viewer off balance. He did however opt for a decidedly darker satirical tone in this film, that may make some people uncomfortable (think "Very Bad Things"). What struck me as particularly daring was his decision to create a story with such a voluminous cast.

Ritchie faced a daunting task with this film: how, with roughly twenty principal characters, does one adequately flesh out each character, and not hopelessly confuse the audience? The feat was made doubly difficult, as several cast members are big name stars. Somehow Ritchie manages - each actor is full bodied, receives ample screen time, and no one character is the centerpiece. With so many talented actors, it is difficult to pick out one performance that stands out: Rade Serbedzija is hilarious as the mad Russian who blithely burns through each of his nine lives, as is Vinnie Jones' manic gentleman hitman. On the other end of the spectrum, is Alan Ford as Brick Top, the promoter with a penchant for pigs, who epitomizes cold-blooded viciousness. If forced to pick my favorite however, I would have to go with Brad Pitt

Pitt resurrects his trailer trash look from "Kalifornia" and adopts a nearly indecipherable brogue that sounds like my best friend's Uncle Wally on a bad day. As Mickey O'Neil, the hard drinking wily grifter and part-time pugilist, Pitt displays a wide range of emotions, demonstrating again that he is not only a star, but also a gifted character actor. And I would be remiss if I didn't mention the dog that subtly stole every scene he appeared in.

While "Snatch" initially struggles to find its stride, and is very similar to Ritchie's earlier film, it is fresh and funny enough to make you forget any minor shortfalls and stand on its own.