Der Mann meines Herzens

L'Homme Que J'aime - The Man I Love

Sweet sad love story but not depressing

My Rating 7/10

I discovered : L'Homme que j'aime)while looking for another film it had been incorrectly titled on Vimeo so I think I was meant to be reminded of those sad days when we all lost our "Longtime Companions ." This is a beautiful love story produced for French television in 1997 and later released at the Cinema in 2001 as well as telling it a love story between two men which set in the early 1990's in when AIDS was still a death sentence and same sex marriage was only a dream . This movie highlights the Political ignorance and indifference that delayed treatment for men who were pleading for medical treatment and care had to take to the streets to demonstrate .

The movie introduces us to Martin (Marcial Di Fonzo Bo), a brash pool monitor and resident lifeguard Lucas (Jean-Michel Portal).

Martin becomes interested in the younger and attractive Lucas but Lucas has a live-in girlfriend, Lise (Mathilde Seigner). Lucas is initially resistant to Martin's courtship dance but there is obviously a spark of recognition and realisation of deeper feelings developing between the two men.

Lise starts to integrate Martin into Lucas and Lisa's social life. Lucas then begins to doubt his heterosexuality and starts falling for Martin. But Martin is declared HIV-positive, which forces Lucas to choose between the terminally ill man he starts to love and his first love Lise.

The motto "Live each day of your life as if it were your last" is the main theme of the film.

It's a very touching French movie and interesting to see a European view of this tragic era during the last World pandemic when Governments acted shamefully at a snails pace in funding medical solutions and care to the me and women who were suffering in stark contrast to our current Covid 19 World pandemic.

Strange summary but let's face it- Jean-Michele Portal's excellent portrayal of "Lucas" reminds me of H of "CSI: Miami". Nearly emotionless, yet full of passion. Too bad American TV is not as sophisticated. I would be willing to bet that nothing was said against the film when it was screened on French TV. Try that in America, land of the free? I doubt it. What are people so afraid of? People in love? Amazing. A magnificent performance by the entire cast. The cute little church toward the end was very nice, as was the entire scenery. Many thanks for a realistic story that saves us the fluff but provides closure and meaning along with hope. Nobody is forgotten. Merci.

The American video release of THE MAN I LOVE wants us to think that this is quite a different film. Note how the pool (which is an indoor facility in the film) is depicted as outdoors, flanked by exotic palm trees? Clearly, this isn't going to be an unconventional romance with an AIDS storyline, right? Wrong! Like the box cover, THE MAN I LOVE tries to have it all by challenging expectations - and it often succeeds.

Like YOU'LL GET OVER IT and JUST A QUESTION OF LOVE, this is another French teleplay with a gay coming-out / coming-of-age theme. What makes this film different, however, is that it refuses to be defined by one genre or other. The story tracks the relationship between straight blonde Adonis diver Lucas and lovelorn gay activist pool attendant Martin - and it is an odd match indeed. At first, Lucas' brusque (borderline rude) behavior to the insistent protestations of love from Martin (all within the first five minutes) seems odd and clearly aimed for comic effect. But the film will not be content with that. As the story progresses it is clear that Martin is the catalyst to Lucas realizing his buried sexuality and finding true love and fulfillment. On the way, it is revealed that Martin is in the last stages of AIDS. This aspect of the story is somewhat softened to preserve the romantic aura, but the sense of impending loss on Lucas is what is key here, not the details of Martin's illness.

The filmmaker's paint a vivid picture of Marseille and seem as in love with the vistas as they are with the characters. Even interior sequences feature windows revealing magnificent views. As if to say, that the world cannot be shut out, and that life lies waiting just outside. The film's biking sequences are key to this sense of 'jois de vive'. Even taking cinematic risks does not derail this film. Having Martin's dead lover on screen during Martin's revelation about him seems a bit much, especially when he leans into the flame to blow out birthday candles. Later, Lucas searches an empty house for the absent Martin and camera trickery has Lucas turn up both at the beginning and end of a slow pan. And what gay film would be complete without the exotic? Enter Martin's mother Rose in a pink car and bearing a more than passingly resembling a drag queen on wheels. Their arm-in-arm exit from a church has the trio walk directly toward the camera and stop - smiling. As if a photographer was taking their wedding photo. Sadly, they are the sole members of the wedding party. But even this does not daunt them. They remain smiling. Staring at us.

THE MAN I LOVE is a unique adventure. Set aside your expectations and look beneath the surface (a pool analogy, yes) and you'll see a film that takes chances - and one that more often than not succeeds.

"L'Homme que j'aime", which outside of France, is being shown as a theatrical movie at several festivals is an upbeat love story, albeit not your conventional love story. First, it is a gay love story. However, it is mainstream in that it is distributed by La Sept-Arte, and features Mathilde Seigner, one of France's most prolific youngish stars. This is a love story which conquers all. Seemingly unsurmountable difficulties are, at the end of the day, surmounted., and overall, the movie transmits a very positive message, unusual both in contemporary gay films and French films in general.

At the age of 55, I've spent my entire life in the USA and have rarely had occasion to view any "foreign" films. In seeking out gay-themed films to watch in recent months, I've discovered that the majority of those generally rated most highly by voters on this site aren't made here (in the USA), and so consequently, fully half of the films I've watched are European-made.

For me, most of these films suffer from three faults: (1) They tend to me far too "preachy." It feels like every scene is trying to demonstrate some important lesson in life, making the movies seem more like a classroom on the big screen rather than entertainment.

(2) The dialogue, even when it's not attempting to teach me something, is awkward and forced. People just don't talk that way; the conversations are always so unnatural that they come across being emotionless, and I don't don't feel emotion in the characters, there really is no point for my being in the movie theater.

(3) The story line is of little or no consequence, since all of the emphasis is given to making a point (see item 1). As a result, I rarely develop any interest in these films.

This movie was an exception to all of the above. Oh, you still do get banged over the head with some commentary on life's little failings, but only softly, and the dialogue could be warmed up and made more believable here and there, and now and then you want to scream at the way Lucas treats Martin or vice-versa - making them look a bit like cold fish, but those momentary lapses didn't seriously impede my enjoyment of the movie.

On the whole, I can happily recommend this movie to others like me for whom an emotionally interesting and involving story-line is the #1 consideration for enjoying a movie.