Teen Knight

Let's see. A dry script, actors who can't even give the impression of acting, special effects that are absolutely laughable, and I've seen better swordplay between 4 year olds with empty paper towel rolls.

I wanted to like this movie, really. It has a great premise; kids at a castle get caught in a time warp, transported back to the middle ages, and have to figure out how to get home. As they look for that mystical door to their own time, they encounter sorcerers, knights, a prince, and dragons. Sounds great, huh? Well, it's just not. I tried to give it a good shot, but towards the end when Peter is fighting the other soldiers in the castle just lost it for me. It's like the actors didn't want to hit their swords together too hard, because the steel barely touches. The whole showdown with Raykin is horrid, too. The director must have told him to just 'lose' the fight, because he repeats the same mistake, over and over. Call me a stickler, but I just can't stand sword fighting scenes that a child wouldn't believe were real.

I'm stretching to give this a 2/10 rating. Maybe a child would enjoy this movie if they've never seen anything in this genre before. Once they've watched another sci-fi/fantasy film, though, steer clear of Teen Knight.

This could well be the most pathetic movie I've ever seen. I've seen kids make a better movie with a home VHS camcorder and some action figures. There was obviously no fight choreographer and it looked like the special effects were a byproduct of a 3 year old going crazy with crayons on the original film print. The one line summary says it all on this one.

Older, I watched this family TV movie with my nephews and they really enjoyed it. They got scared, excited, laughed, and were quite pleased with the ending of the story. It definitely is an exciting adventure film for the family. Kris Lemche, the star, is a great young actor. Script is not always up to par, but the directing is very good. Feels like the director did an incredible job with the script he was given. The Art direction has an inspiring castle, and wonderful dragons done in computer generated images. Feels like medieval Europe with Amercain & Canadian actors; a great mix. I recommend this film for your kids too. It will make them dream, and wish they could live these type of adventures. This film will make them live it!

Rented this movie under the title "Medieval Park" - My 7 year old picked it out, thinking his Medieval-loving 11 yr old brother would enjoy it, and it really did sound like it would be pretty cool. WRONG! 5 minutes in it had already lost their attention. The 11 yr old labeled it "lame" from the start, although he was impressed with the castle. I didn't pay too much attention to it until they started laughing hysterically at the sword fight: tap right, tap left, tap right, tap left......really?!?! We also noticed that the boy on the face of the DVD was not even an actor in the movie. Caterina S. needs to remove this one from her resume'. Wouldn't want anyone to accidentally come across it and prejudge her performance.

Okay, when I saw the cover and when the movie first started, I thought, "This looks like something I could have made in my garage." But it turned out to be pretty entertaining for mindless, low-budget fare. There were some actually pretty funny parts, especially the sword fights where it looks like nobody wants to get their hands dirty and everybody looks all apologetic for landing a blow. And some great, hilarious magic fights. Some people would think that's bad acting; I think it's hilarious -- as did the 40 grade-schoolers I was watching it with.

Yes, the script is cheesy, cliché, and near-plagiaristic. Yes, the acting is pretty bad. (Although I've seen much, much worse.) The directing and editing isn't great and the special effects are embarrassing, but I was never bored watching this movie, which is more than I can say for something more "cultured" like, say "Thin Red Line?". And I personally found it much funnier than the self-proclaimed World's Funniest Movie Ever, "Knocked Up." (Which was a terrifying experience. I had to sneak into "Paranormal Activity" to actually find something to laugh at.)

"Teen Knight/Medieval Park", however it is branded in your district, makes for a rollicking fun night with the family. Plus, there were bare-shouldered medieval wenches, so a good time was had by all. But overall, this makes for a more engaging evening than many "Oscar contenders" out there. (*cough * cough* Terence Malick *cough)