Welcum to My Face

Fans are used to seeing Raquel Darian in glamorous settings thanks to her Vivid Video assignments, but here she's featured, alongside her man Derrick Lane, in a crummy, grubby looking feature from Zane Entertainment Group. I never bought or rented a Zane video back in the VHS era of the '90s (sticking with quality porn from the likes of Adam & Eve, Sin City, Wicked, etc.) and am singularly unimpressed with their aritifacts now popping up on freebie internet sites.

This one was directed by Charlie Diamond, whose work is uniformly awful, though IMDb credits it (without substantiation) to Chi Chi LaRue. It starts off with Raquel on the phone with a gal pal Marilyn Rose in dull conversation to announce she's finally going to have sex with Derrick, and sure enough that's the movie's first XXX scene.

The star couple disappear, and Marilyn takes over the movie, throwing a party where folks chat (improvised, dull dialogue) and Saki St. Jermaine has a fight with her hubby Wayne Summers, after which she immediately seduces German stud Alex Horn in the bathroom.

Infidelity must be contagious, because Wayne immediately humps the hostess (I couldn't resist that Elizabeth Taylor line), Marilyn. Saki catches them in the act, gets madder at Wayne and then forces Marilyn to have lesbian sex with her. It's that kind of a party.

Rene Foxx chats with Marilyn and decides to make a play for the piano player (Steve Austin in a cameo, not bad tinkling the ivories for real), but he turns her down, and Wayne seduces her instead. Rene's reward is a sloppy facial.

Not much of a movie, perhaps resembling in terms of aimlessness those rambling Robert Altman movies which seemed so innovative at the time (lots and lots of characters interacting pointlessly so that critics could enthuse about Bob's overlapping dialogue) but were so inferior to his 1970s fantasy efforts (see: "Images", "Three Women", etc.).