Mars - The Dark Secret

"Mars" - a very hard name to carry off for what is at very best a "B" movie. After all, Mars is dramatic territory explored before by Edgar Rice Burroughs, C.S. Lewis, Robert A. Heinlein, Isaac Asimov and Philip K. Dick (among many others).

The writers of this turkey should have stayed home. It's no crime to realize your limitations and work within them - and these guys might have a promising future in the porn industry if they apply themselves. As serious screenwriters they seem outclassed.

Olivier Gruner fails to impress the viewer as the protagonist Caution Templer, a lawman who must defend himself from attackers while investigating the mysterious death of his brother (also a lawman) on the Martian outpost Alpha City. (Fans of French science-fiction cinema will recall the classic "Alphaville," whose protagonist was named "Lemmy Caution.")

The director and screenwriters have Caution Templar bulling through all sorts of unsocial encounters with bad guys with nary a scratch... and actor Gruner's delivery is such that calling it "wooden" is unkind to wood.

Other action film actors' "wooden delivery" is leavened by compensating features. Next time, Olivier, please watch a LOT of Clint Eastwood's spaghetti westerns and the "Dirty Harry" oeuvre, and see how HE gets away with it.

Shari Belafonte turns in a better performance, but her character is a dim copy of Frances Sternhagen's frontier quack in "Outland" - without the dramatic scope of the original character. Rae Dawn Chong joins the throng of name actors who sleepwalk through their parts - whether this was the fault of the part she was given or her own acting isn't clear, because trying to inject some sort of animation into this script might have opened the cast to charges of overacting. And they're the TALENT in this picture.

The plot's uninspiring in the way of nearly every French science-fiction film except for "The Fifth Element." I generally felt robbed of the time I spent watching this turkey. It shares all the weaknesses of the films from which it cribs, but shares NONE of their high spots.

Your mileage may vary if you like this sort of film. It sure has enough action to carry the attention of a hard-core fan of slasher sci-fi - say, if you thought the face-suckers and gut-ripping scenes were the high points of the "Alien" movies. If so, feel free to indulge, there's plenty of that stuff there to keep you happy.

MARS is probably the most boring film you can find starring Oliver Gruner. NEMESIS was an okay movie (despite it being made by Albert Puyn), but this little "action"-movie is very boring.

The story is stolen from all other Mars-movies, and is of course about that evil corporation that has a mining enterprise on the planet. Gruner is to find out what happened to his brother, who was murdered two days ago. And that's about as exciting it gets...

The bad-guys have VERY disappointing dialogue and the script is poorly written. The main idea is not at all bad. The production could have been so much better with some re-writes. The cast isn't necessary all bad either - especially Lee de Broux (RoboCop) is nice to see, even though he doesn't have much to work with.

Gruner himself isn't all that bad either, but the lack of a good script, the bad directing, the VERY bad sets and props and especially the terrible dialogue is making this film a very boring and very bad movie. Yes, it is in the league of Creepozoids and Timewalker.

I give this film 1 out of 10.

The budget for Mars was about $1 million US. That wasn't much money, and almost all of it went to the film's paltry CGI effects, and one explosion scene.

The film was shot by a first time director in an abandoned shopping mall. Most of the places you see in the film are converted retail stores like Gap or Foot Locker. The surface of mars is a truckload of sand that someone dumped in the food court and died red. If you look closely at the costumes, you can see that the futuristic breathing equipment is made from pool toys that were spray-painted black. You just can't make this stuff up.

Sharon Belafonte tries to make a comeback in this film... and fails. She looks good for her age though. Grunier does a good Terminator impression, as in, shows little or no emotion for the whole film.

There is a lot of terribly negative reviews of this movie. I can certainly see why. There are parts of this movie which seem incoherent, unnecessary and silly; I will not lie. The Plot is thin, but the Protagonist, Caution Templar, (Olivier Gruner) gives a performance that is on par with the likes of Chuck Norris or Steven Segal. That may not be your forte, and that is fine. If it isn't, then you may wish to watch something else, if however you like seeing the protagonist kick butt all the way through and not even get touched, this might be for you. Caution Templar is a member of a Mining Company's police force. His brother was as well. Caution is there to investigate his brother's disappearance and death. He kick-boxes his way through henchmen and finds out why his brother is killed. On his way he meets Doc Halliday (Shari Bellfonte) and they work together. He also meets an irritating sidekick and I was thankful to see he didn't have much in the movie. This is a C+ movie. It is not ground breaking stuff by far, but given the facts in the trivia, that this movie was shot in an old shopping mall on 1 million dollars budget and a short time, it is not terrible. It will not compete with Total Recall or other A list Mars movies, but it is like your first car, rough around the edges, but gets you there. It is worth your time if you can see past a few faults.

OK, so it's been a few years since I watched this movie, and I'll have to dig it out of my collection and rewatch it one of these days, however I have to say that while this movie didn't thrill me, it's no where near the worst movies out there.

Just in case you're at a bargain bin and you see, say, this movie and "King of the Ants", or "King Kong Lives", or maybe "Ghost Rock", then by all means take home Mars. It's the classic line you get from the second worse team in a league: "We don't suck the worst". I've definitely seen worse. A cop gets a message from his brother that sends him to Mars where he finds his brother is dead. With the help of a local babe he has to biatch-slap his way around to find out what's going on. So, it's pretty much a Hollywood plot retread, but as I mentioned it's sure not the worst you can do in a pinch.