Martians Go Home

Ever wonder what Earth would be like if we were invaded by Martians who all thought they were a bunch lousy comedians? Me neither! But for those who do there's 'Martians Go Home,' a laughless comedy that lives up to it's title. You'll be begging for the Martians to go home a mere 10 seconds after they first appear. The Martians are almost all played by stand-up comedians, among them Barry Sobel and Rob Schneider. People who know how to be funny, but you'd never know it here. About the only thing I enjoyed about this movie was seeing Dean Devlin, future producer of 'Independence Day' playing a hot-shot director of sci-fi films. It was good for a short laugh.

Not the worst movie I have ever seen, but close (that dubious honour is split between Cheerleader Ninjas and Space Thing). Martians come to town and annoy the f*** out of humans. That's it for the idea. Apparently the book is much, MUCH better.

The good things I have to say are few, but I need this bit for you to be able to read this: the director knows how to point a camera, get a scene edited to his liking, and at least not rely on ridiculous amounts of fart jokes and dildoes (both Cheerleader Ninjas references).

And to the person that was suggesting that we were wrong to call this movie bad Sci-fi: You're very wrong. We acknowledge that this movie is not particularly scientific. The problem is that it's bad COMEDY.

You know, if the Martians used this movie as a weapon to invade, they'd have conquered Earth a long time ago.

"Martians Go Home" is about as bad as sci-fi gets. In fact, this isn't even sci-fi; it's what dumb people think is sci-fi. This is what freshmen screen writers turn in for their first major script, thinking it's sci-fi. No self-respecting bird would have his cage lined with this script.

Okay, get the picture? No? Well, consider this....

This travesty-on-film stars Quaid as a commercial jingle writer who writes a song that Martians receive and take as a hint to invade, which they do. Looks like they sent their worst, though, cause all that is sent to overpower us are a bunch of green-skinned losers that look and act like those filler acts they have at The Improv.

I never read the book this movie was based on. I'm kind of afraid to now; just gun-shy, I guess. But if film makers could be so off-base on a movie where the book is supposed to be so superior, is it any wonder that no one's heard much from the director and writers since this?

No, I didn't think so.

TIDBIT - after this mess, three of the stars here went on to do a MUCH superior sci-fi film. Quaid and Colin had major parts in "Independence Day", which was co-scripted by Dean Devlin. Talk about a step-up!

No stars for these least-favorite "Martians".

This is the worst movie ever made. The acting is poor, the story is neither funny nor does it make any sense and what is supposed to be comical is only annoying and tedious. While watching I developed a strong aggression against the little green men who jumped out of every corner preferably in the most embarrassing situations. I have no clue why I continued to watch this movie until the end, but for the first time in my life a felt a great relief when a movie was over.

I hope that by writing this comment I save a few innocent souls from watching this botch and risking permanent damage to their sense of humor.

A classic, if light, SF comedy novel becomes a tired and dragging mess. Some writers and directors have the talent and ability to overcome the limitations of a low budget, to show what they are capable of - but in this film there is nothing to suggest they could ever raise themselves above straight to video and 3am showings.