Hardbodies 2

"Hardbodies 2" is harmless, aimless and plot less. I would add "brainless" to that list, but the movie-within-a-movie gimmick, although not done very well, helps it to narrowly escape that label. The scenery has changed from the California beaches to the Greek islands, and the only returning cast members from the first film are Sorrells Pickard (the bearded guy) and Roberta Collins (who at one point falls into a mud pit, bringing back memories of her classic catfight with Pam Grier in "The Big Doll House"). All the other actors are new, but apparently Brad Zutaut is supposed to be playing the same character (Scotty) as Grant Cramer did in "Hardbodies". This sequel lacks the energy and appeal of the first movie, and doesn't come close to matching it in the "hotness" department, either. Of course Brenda Bakke and Fabiana Udenio are both very pretty, but the Teal Roberts - Cindy Silver - Kristi Somers team is unbeatable. "Hardbodies 2" is not the worst of its kind by any means, but if you only want to see one of these movies, the original is the one to get. (*1/2)

Pointless movie about making a movie. No where near the flesh shown in the original, which was quite enjoyable and even had fun music. Not here.

It's always fun seeing the Pathmark guy though.

When I was 9, about the time this movie came out, I spent a lot of time at the neighborhood pool. While checking out some local hardbodies and doing cannonballs, I overheard some goofball saying to his friends, "You know what 'hardbodies' means? Good Sex." I didn't believe it then, and I don't believe it now. I had often seen the VHS case for the original "Hardbodies" in the video store, and I had always understood, mainly from the information given by this video cover, what "Hardbodies" meant.That being a collection of sunny, beach side scenes of young, firm, hot, easy girls in bikinis --and the dorks they were involved with. I never actually saw the movie.

Tonight, Encore Love played Hardbodies 2, and with nothing else remotely interesting to do, I put it on the TV whilst surfing the net. This movie is, in fact, despite what the first commentator claims, "a typical jiggle and giggle fest from the 80's." But that's not a bad thing. This is perfect summer fodder, it's straight to video schlock that you wouldn't pay 5$ for the DVD of, but as a late night cable movie, it works on the most repulsive level: it's only a notch above LCD, and at that only because it features sunny beach side scenes of young, firm, hot, easy girls in bikinis--and out of them. Whatever.

It does feature the girl who played the foreign exchange student in "Summer School", Fabiana Udenio. She gets quit a bit of screen time in this one, as the female lead/ romantic interest. She does well, given the script, but her accent and her latina hotness land the type-cast role. Her boobs are not featured, unfortunately.

Anyway, it's better than Weekend at Bernie's(1989), though nowhere near it's contemporary, Savage Steve Holland's One Crazy Summer(1986). I can't believe I just wasted ten minutes of my life writing this.

This film was produced and released as a successor to a ghastly - although fairly popular - slapstick Californian beach comedy called Hardbodies, but it has little or no connection with the earlier film and is better assessed completely in its own right. It is certainly better than Hardbodies I, and is more closely related to films such as Venus and Summer Lovers which were also filmed during summer in the Greek Islands. The combination of blissful beaches on blue bays with beautiful bare bosoms makes for seductive viewing, but (except for travelogues just designed to help plan your next holiday) even such films require an adequate story line if they are to hold a viewers attention for more than a very few minutes. Venus was underpinned by the legend of the re-incarnation of the goddess, and Summer Lovers had the viability of a "menage a trois" as its theme. In my view both these films were much more successful than Hardbodies II which has a very tenuous story line and depends too much on simplistic semi-slapstick comedy. The use of slapstick quickly becomes tedious, it usually leads to a series of very short self contained cameo sequences that are hard to integrate into an ongoing story line. Mel Brooks achieved this brilliantly with Silent Movie, but few other films have succeeded in the same way, and Hardbodies II unfortunately does not. There is also the problem that the slapstick sequences do not co-habit happily with the idyllic and peaceful scenario in which the film is set. The final airport sequences were no doubt intended to provide a hilarious ending for this film but in my opinion they are an example of the worst type of overplayed slapstick pseudo-comedy. They are also grossly overlong, so I left the cinema with a bad taste left in my mouth. This is a film which could have been much more successful with a stronger story line and with most of its slapstick sequences very heavily pruned. As it was released it certainly does not warrant a viewers rating higher than 3.

There is little memorable in the acting, but the cast does its best within the limitations imposed by a meagre story line and poor direction - it is in these latter areas that the failure arises.

But it doesn't try to be. If you judge it in relationship to it's genre (coming-of-age teen nudie flick) it's - not bad. Bare bones plot and no characters worth remembering, but attractive models (they don't act enough to call them actresses) and a lack of false pretension or nudge-nudge-wink-wink sensuality make this worth a $1 or less rental fee. It's a guilty pleasure, like Moon Pies and cheesecake.