There are bad films I hate, and there are bad films to be savored. Nam Angels would fit the latter type. This is a cheap, preposterous, and insulting to the intelligence "Vietnam" film made in the Phillipines. Despite its faults, there is enough action and energy packed into its 91 minutes that it will most certainly liven the mood in any room.
Get a load of this plot: An army Lieutenant (Brad Johnson) and his small recon unit are ambushed during the Vietnam war. He escapes, but two of his men are taken prisoner. Not by the NVA, but by a tribal army led by a mysterious white mercenary who is seen as a deity by them. Hello, Apocalypse Now! The area where the men are being kept prisoner is about to be "bombed into no-man's land". The men are considered expendable. Lieutenant Calhoun, desperate to get his men out, decides to recruit four California Hell's Angels to ride into the area with him on motorcycles and take down the tribal army and their leader!!! Yes, but it gets better! See, there's also a hidden cache of gold dust within the enemy fort. $10 million worth, one soldier calculates after merely picking up one vile of the stuff and dumping a little out. The Hell's Angels will get the gold, and Calhoun will get his men if all goes according to plan.
How could a plan like that go wrong? The guys have even thought to have a supply of fuel waiting for them at the midway point of the trip so they can make it back. Now how many low-budget films would have considered that detail, huh? Well, as soon as the Angels find out the whole thing is really a rescue mission, they do what you'd expect. They turn on Calhoun. It's up to him to pull the group together, defeat the tribal army, and get his men out. Wow! This film is extremely violent. That's a good thing, since whenever anyone is just standing around talking, you get treated to poor dialog and acting by all. I'd estimate this film has a higher on-screen body count than even Commando. Speaking of that film, the number one baddie from it (Vernon Wells) is the bad guy in this one, too. Gone is his Freddie Mercury mustache, and now he has a bleached blonde mullet tied behind his head in a pony tail. He gives by far the most lively and nuanced performance, but he is by all means a destitute-man's Marlon Brando. I wouldn't dream of revealing who all lives or dies, but in the final scene, a quote from Milton about heaven or hell flashes on the screen. It appears to have no logical connection at all to the story.
Brad Johnson is not bad as Calhoun. His character is supposedly from West Texas, and he fights mostly with a lasso and a sawed-off shotgun. Johnson actually went on from this film and had somewhat of a decent career. The rest of the cast is pretty awful.
By the way, what were California Hell's Angels doing in Vietnam?? Were they laying low after all the chaos they caused during the Rolling Stones' set at Altamont??? 5 of 10 stars from the Hound.
