The Sisterhood

Cirio H. Santiago is a director who has made quite a few "girls-with-guns" (or, in this case, "girls-with-swords-and-later-guns") films; he could perhaps be described as another Andy Sidaris, but with less sleaze and an even lower budget. "The Sisterhood", a cheesy post-apocalyptic flick complete with laser beams and "talking" hawks, must not be one of his best moments: most of the action sequences are rather flat, and there is too much wandering around in the desert. But the two female leads are physically well-cast, and as for the third....let's just say that if you ever wanted to see Lynn-Holly Johnson, of "For Your Eyes Only" fame, kicking some serious butt (though it is never quite explained how her character is able to do that), this may be your only chance! (**)

In this goofy, female empowerment, post-holocaust tale from director Cirio H. Santiago ("Equalizer 2000"), it's the future year of 2021. In the deserts of Earth, men hold all the power and have enslaved many women. It's up to the nomadic ladies known as "The Sisterhood" to restore some sense of equality. Two such Sisters that we meet are Alee (Rebecca Holden) and Vera (Barbara Patrick, the wife of Robert P.). They take under their wing a teen aged girl named Marya (Lynn-Holly Johnson of "Ice Castles" and "For Your Eyes Only"), whose kid brother (Tom McNeeley) was killed by one of the male antagonists, a warrior named Mikal (Chuck Wagner, "America 3000").

"The Sisterhood" is good, light entertainment for sci-fi lovers who favor the cheesy and silly side of post-holocaust cinema. It does earn some points for portraying its women as strong and independent, but not invulnerable. It also gives Alee and Vera special powers - Vera is telekinetic and Alee has healing abilities. Our three heroines generate sufficient rooting interest, and all of our grunting pig villains are appropriately odious. Mikal is an exception, proving to be more than one-dimensional.

Fine use is made of locations. The sets, costumes, and vehicles look decent enough for whatever minimal budget "The Sisterhood" had. The music score by Jun Latonio is variable: sometimes it's passable, and at other times it is just *awful*. It's all pleasantly cheesy, with a little bit of gore (there's a few close ups of sword wounds) and a fair amount of action. The performances are actually not too bad - Robert Dryer, the main baddie in "Savage Streets", as the creepy Lord Barak, Anthony East as Lord Jak. The female cast is very attractive, and there are adequate doses of bare flesh throughout.

Watching this one is a harmless enough way to kill a little over an hour and a half.

Seven out of 10.

With a hundred films under his belt, I doubt very much that The Sisterhood is the worst film directed by Filipino hack Cirio H. Santiago, but it can't be far off. Part sword and sorcery flick, and part Mad Max rip-off, but ALL awful, the film takes place in a post-apocalyptic future (the far-flung year of 2021) where warlords rule the three kingdoms, and a band of women, The Sisterhood, roam the outlands in an attempt to restore peace and equality.

Bond girl Lynn-Holly Johnson plays 18-year-old Marya, who joins female freedom-fighters Alee (Rebecca Holden) and Vera (Barbara Patrick) on their quest to rescue their sisters, who have been imprisoned by Lord Kragg (Kenneth Peerless) in Calcara. On their journey, Marya learns more about her special gift - her ability to talk to hawk Lady Shri - and, being a quick learner, picks up some nifty fight moves, handy for when she finally comes face to face with Mikal (Chuck Wagner), the warrior who killed her brother.

After Vera is abducted by Mikal and his men, and taken to Calcara, Alee and Marya narrowly escape being killed by mutants (men in rags with mud on their faces), stumble upon a cave full of automatic weapons and an armoured vehicle, and proceed to lay waste to the enemy despite no prior knowledge of firearms and zero experience behind the wheel.

Packed full of badly choreographed fight scenes, dreadful dialogue and tepid escapades for our heroines, The Sisterhood might have been a lot of cheesy fun if only the direction wasn't so uninspired and the budget clearly lacking. Sadly, the whole thing looks and feels extremely cheap, from the really naff Mad Max reject vehicles, to the crappy costumes and props, to the awful music, which sounds like a drunk is bashing random keys on a Bontempi organ.

The fun stuff: a modicum of gore (a couple of sword slashings and a severed hand), a reasonable amount of topless nudity (I counted nine breasts), and one of the chicks can fire lasers from her eyes. The rest of the film is dull grade-Z trash.

2.5/10, rounded up to 3 for IMDb (although it doesn't deserve to be).

Cirio H. Santiago managed to churn out one B-flick I actually enjoyed, 1981's Firecracker with martial artist who wasn't afraid to go nude, Jillian Kesner. She knew EXACTLY what kind of film she was in and committed to it, not to mention she could act as well as fight.

Were it only The Sisterhood even 1/10th as good. Poor acting, directing and dialogue requires at least some sort of offset such as convincing action, dazzling pyro, generous nudity/sex or some actual drama. Nearly everything felt so contrived or phoned-in that it had no impact.

In this, yet another apocalyptic, MAD MAX ROAD WARRIOR spin-off, we find ourselves in the year 2021, when "all women are slaves and all men are their masters!" until...The Sisterhood arrives! The film features a young Anna Farris-look alike, who is allegedly a witch and has a pet hawk named Lady Shree. Orphaned along with her younger brother, they hide out in the desert from the marauding bands with the hawk as their only companion. The brother mentions a group of women fighters of lore, the Sisterhood, whom traveling bards have sung of. The sister, named Marya, dismisses such a story as old wives' tales, but not before the brother opines that his sister should seek refuge among the Sisterhood. When she points out they only accept women, he decides he will become a traveling bard too. In terms of the plot, that's all you need to know to enjoy this movie.

The plot, unlike other sword and sorcery/post-apocalyptic movies (I'm looking at you, The Sword and The Sorcerer, and She, the latter I gave 10 stars, but not because of its plot!) makes sense, but there are some silly elements. The villain, Mikal, looks like he should be the good guy, and the emblem on his chest bears a menorah. Oh, and the leader of the Sisterhood wears a crown that I kept mistaking for a porkie pie hat throughout. The cars are cool, but not anything fancier than Road Warrior. The music is dreadful, feeling like an 8-bit version of a circus. I give this a 8 for its plot, landscape, hawk-human relationship, and scenes involving girls with guns, tanks, and long bows.