Monster Hospital

I won't even go into how funny, obnoxious, or drab this movie is (you can get all that from the title, or just the picture on the cover). I won't get into why I even watched it, because I don't know why, other than that I owned it for some reason. All I want to talk about is how amorally horrible it is. Okay, so it's bad to over-analyze dreck like this, but at least it kept me slightly ocupied while I half-hazardly watched it. "Bob" (Mark Blankfeld), channelling gene wilder), is a snide twerp who steals and blackmails, let alone harasses his assistant. The assistant (Iggy- cute, huh? Played by Leslie Jordan- avoid all movies with this whining puffball at all costs) murders people. The "sexy" dominatrix psychiatrist has random sex with a monster. The monster throws a blind girl out the window (this scene might've been funny if a better director did it, but it just comes off sort of stupidly chilling (?) to me here). These are the good guys. And the bad guys? Well, there's the evil head of the hospital, who's upset... because people are dying in his hospital. Then there's the oafish Dr. who cries because he's being framed for killing his patients. Then there's the sinister professor who wants revenge on Bob... because bob stole his experiment. Yeah, great character development, guys. Next time you make a crappy movie at least try to make the heroes likable. Oh yeah, the acting's okay.

This is a comedy movie about Frankenstein. So comedies about Frankenstein are very funny. Like Abbot and Costello meet Frankenstein and Young Frankenstein. Young Frankenstein is the movie that probably influenced this movie. Unlike Young Frankenstein this movie is not funny at all. There are to many comedy is movies that are not funny. I would say that 95% of all comedy movie are not funny. And this is one of that 95%. If a Frankenstein movie it not going to be funny than is should be scary. This movie is not scary. Mind it is not met to be it met to funny. It' not. Don't wast your money. This movie as awful story line. There best joke were the ones they took from Young Frankenstein. And there were worst jokes in Young Frankenstein. And the acting is awful.

Yes, this movie is stupid. It is stupid in a special kind of way, however. A sort of dry, later 1980s "Night Court" inspired stupidity that can often work if you are stoned, tired, bored, or in need of a life. I was tired and maybe a bit stoned, but honestly, after about a half an hour of one of the most obnoxious set-up periods for a horror/comedy satire/parody I have seen this actually became painless, and at times even somewhat enjoyable.

The opening passage is atrocious: I'd say maybe fast-forward to about the 10 minute mark on your first time through. It took me two watches to "get" the movie's sense of humor, though the insight I had on the second perusal is that the opening 10 minutes were SO annoying that they stilted my perceptions of the remainder of the film. Familiar 80s/90s TV & bit movie actor Mark Blankfield -- perhaps best known in the worst kind of way for his lead role in the made-for-TV abomination THE JERK, TOO -- plays yuppie doctor Robert Frankenstein, director of a TV sitcom hospital populated by people like Ben Stein, sexy redhead sexpot nurse Katie Caple (who's elevator scene steals the show) and former Playboy Playmate of the Year Kathy Shower. Right.

Ms. Shower is actually the 2nd most interesting thing in the script, playing a high-heeled glasses wearing psychiatrist hot mom type who is also a practicing dominatrix. I take it I have your attention now. The most interesting thing in the film, though, is Irwin Keyes' "Monster", who's idea of going on a rampage consists of swiping a punk's leather jacket and boombox & cruising the halls of the hospital looking for things to knock over, starting with Kathy Shower who it turns out was looking for just such a man all her life. What's even more fascinating is that Mr. Keyes appears to be playing the Frankenstein monster without any special makeup effects other than some eye shadow & greasepaint stitchmarks. He came looking like that, kudos to the casting director at any rate.

Like I said, this movie has something to it. The people who made it weren't stupid, though in spite of the movies dry sense of humor the word subtlety was not in their vocabulary. The film "looks" stupid, or was rather crafted to appear stupid on initial glance. The second time through you start to realize that Dr. Frankenstein is sort of on his own wavelength; he seems to look through people when he's talking to them, and while he doesn't have any truly memorable one-liners a lot of what he has to say is genuinely amusing. The side antics like his twisted little Igor type Iggy I could have done without, however, and the mixture of some genuinely R-rated nudity & fake gore juxtaposed against the adolescent, pin-headed humor is offbeat.

One other contributor did sum it up best, however, when stating that hospitals are not that funny once you get down to it. My guess is that the producers were more interested in updating the Frankenstein mythology without appearing to mimic YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN, which isn't easy. Mel Brooks' superior parody got it's foot in the cement first so any subsequent film sending up Frankenstein will inevitably draw unfavorable comparison. I wouldn't even go so far as to say that this is an updating of those ideas for a late 1980s television comedy mindset, more a sort of quirky, half-throwaway project that appears to be too stupid for it's own good.

Until the girls rip their nurses costumes off, that is. Funny how important an element is to a movie like this, cos otherwise there really is no reason to bother with it when the whole Frankenstein movie tradition itself is so absurd as to be hilarious without any embellishments. Take any one of the Hammer Frankenstein films with Peter Cushing and watch it in a MST3K kind of environment and you'll find three times as much to laugh at, if you bother to think about how silly they all really are. If you can't, try this movie. It isn't very good but then again if you are looking to Frankenstein for your comedy you probably deserve whatever you get.

5/10, which is admittedly generous but it made me laugh; Try it on a double bill with the equally obscure DR. HACKENSTEIN.

This feels like an indirect sequel to Jekyll & Hyde...Together Again(1982). It's similar that they both star Mark Blankfield and take place mostly in a hospital setting. This feels alot like Jekyll but with less drug humor and more sex humor. Some genuine light horror scenes,and some scenes are very hilarious. Love the appearance of the actress Bunky Jones,she is my favorite B-movie horror actress I think. The low budget is the only thing that hurts this,otherwise a really underrated late 80's comedy!

You know you're in trouble when Kathy Shower is both the most recognizable name and the best actress in the cast. Actually, there isn't enough Kathy Shower in "Frankenstein General Hospital" to save it. The film does boast one good idea - shooting all the laboratory scenes in black & white, as a kind of homage to the old Frankenstein classics. Other than that, it is boring, amateurish and witless. * out of 4.