Can't Stop the Music

I'm a regular customer of a local movie theater that shows old films, and six years ago they screened Can't Stop the Music - I went to see it, and found it an absolute hoot in campy humor! No-holds-barred, super-fast direction, flashy sets and special effects, glitzy musical numbers (the YMCA scene is awe-inducing!) and actors that really looked like they had a lot of fun cooking the whole thing up! It was the best cinematic experience I ever had. Never once did I glance at my watch, which for me is rather amazing. After gobbling up the whole enchilada, I started wishing I could find a copy of it somewhere. Alas, I still haven't.

A few months ago, the same theater showed the film again. I usually don't see a movie twice in a theater, but my memory needed refreshment, and my soul some cheering up. I went, and had just as much fun as I did the first time.

What's most amazing about CSTM is that although the director (whom I recognize as the deaf-and-dumb maid in the equally enjoyable Murder By Death) makes the actors rush through their lines and behave like over-energized hyperactive brats, and narrates the story so fast there's not even time to develop moments of crisis that last longer than a few seconds, the movie actually clocks in at two hours! Be grateful to the director and the screenwriters - a third hour would just have been asking too much of the audience.

CSTM contains some of the most pointless attempts at comedy I've ever seen, and probably ever will see (Bobo Lewis's bread woman - um, huh??), and the only clever line I found was uttered by Perrine when she says bye to Paul Sand's Steve the Record Producer - it's made up almost entirely of song titles. But the actors' eagerness makes up for the lame humor, and salvages even the scenes where Jenner has to make a complete fool of himself (the trouser incident and everything that follows).

I fear that if I ever find CSTM on video or DVD, the small screen will terribly banalize the film, but I won't care. But all you out there - watch the film on the big screen if you get the chance!

I urge everyone to buy a bottle of booze and see this movie immediately.

If only for the Construction Worker's song "I love you to death" in which girls ride atop giant pistons and sprinkle glitter all over his jeans. Or maybe the Leatherman's rousing version of "Danny Boy" atop a table in a Board Room. Or, maybe the gigantic musical busby berkley dance numbers with added "onion skin" rainbow graphics of naked men jumping into swimming pools. Or, maybe the worlds most bizarre milk commercial starring the Village People singing about how a milkshake goes with your sandwich too.

Be warned though, the songs are kind of decent. Maybe even better than decent. And theres a great performance by the otherwise mediocre Ritchie Family. Seriously, i love this movie. Everyone i have shown it to has remembered it, and maybe hates me for it. But its definitely an original.

This is the best bad movie of all time. Ofcourse that means Steve Guttenberg and disco music are in it. I saw this once, ten years ago and will never ever forget it. The construction worker of the Village People does a musical number about milk. The film was directed by the late Nancy Walker of "quicker picker upper" fame. Bruce Jenner stars. The bizzarre factoids surrounding this film never quit. Whoever can watch this and not repeatedly laugh out loud needs to check their pulse. I fear my compulsion to buy the dvd. God help me, the howling indian. Classic badness.

This movie is amazing!! Rarely in the history of mankind have we seen a movie so incredibly awful that it becomes a "must-see film". And, interestingly enough, this film is one of four from 1979-1980 that I have reviewed that all fall into this same category. To what do we owe this honor? Well, 1979-1980, for those of you who are blessed to be too young to remember it, was time of the last gasp of disco AND the short-lived roller-disco craze. And, all four horrible movies I strongly recommend are so bad, so stupid, so over-the-top bad that they are truly must-see films for bad movie fans. So here is my list of the unholy 4--XANADU, ROLLER BOOGIE, THE APPLE and CAN'T STOP THE MUSIC. All four are chock full of disco as well as crappy dialog and minimal production values. My vote for most awful of these is the sci-fi, disco, religious epic THE APPLE, but any of the four is strongly recommended for a good laugh!

Now, for the specifics on CAN'T STOP THE MUSIC--which, when you watch it you may want to re-name "CAN'T STOP THE RETCHING". Back in 1980, the least well-kept secret in America was the fact that the Village People were gay. Believe it or not, many Americans who loved their music lived in complete denial that these were six gay men from Greenwich Village. Well, all doubt and ambiguity is erased in this film! While a few times in the movie, the ultra-horny character, Lulu, makes very clumsy passes at these guys, the long, over-the-top and strongly homo-erotic music videos within the movie make it obvious these men were quite gay--and this is especially true of their rendition of YMCA--which looks sort of like a gay version of Heaven. In fact, the campiness of the movie is sort of like a combination of Liberace with gay disco--with the most flamboyant and silly sets and costumes you'll see outside of a gay pride march. BUT, despite the singing being so incredibly overdone and campy, it actually works in some cases as you'll probably find yourself tapping your feet and getting into the songs--or at least some of them. They are BAD, yes, but still kinda fun at the same time. The final song, CAN'T STOP THE MUSIC, initially is very catchy as well, but goes on and on and on and on until you are nearly ready to go berserk!

So, if the music is strange but not THAT bad, why did I give the movie a 2? Well, that's because when they are not singing, the members of The Village People have very little to say and absolutely no charisma because they are not actors. So, they fill in this gap by having real actors(?) do almost all the dialog. And, for the most part, they assembled the absolute worst actors Hollywood had to offer!! So, the main problem with the movie rests not on the Village People but on everything else about the movie!! To help illustrate HOW bad the acting is, one of the big "stars" for the movie is a very young and obnoxious Steve Guttenburg! He is assisted by the pleasantly built but incredibly bland Valerie Perrine and the ultra-wooden Bruce Jenner!!! This movie, in fact, single-handedly ruined Jenner's bid to become a serious actor, as he had all the personality and chemistry of Mr. Potatohead.

Now, so far this movie offers us one music video after another (many with very gay visuals that will make a few uncomfortable but most just laugh), horrible acting and dialog, a dopey story and wretched direction by Nancy Walker (yes, the Bounty commercial woman). And, when you put them all together you have a movie that is even worse than a sum of all its parts--so bad, that you'll most likely laugh yourself silly and have great time making fun of the ineptness of the film. Call some friends and make this the party film you all won't soon forget!

The Village people started as a band who was for the Gay community. Then, something else happened. Teenagers started to like them, but on a totally different level of the disco music and costume theatrics.

When it came time to make a movie, which audience do you try to satisfy?

Well, I guess Alan Carr thought you could satisfy them both.

The result is one of the most incredibly bizarre, unintentionally funny musicals ever made. One that tried to balance Family friendly and Gay friendly to help VP's duel followings to come and enjoy.

But even my naive, young self who saw this movie when it first came out could sense that... something was amiss in the village :)

I mean, the YMCA sequence has quick, almost subliminal cuts of a bunch of guys in the shower, one slapping a towel on the others butt (swear to God!) in between loving, slow motion shots of buff oiled athletic guys and an all male sychronized swimming team scene.

Hmmm....

That was a bit sledgehammer, even for me back then.

Then, I watched it more recently and found a gay movie that was in denial

You have a movie that never says the "G" word but has an incredibly effeminate man with TIGHT gold shorts come in and Juggle "Flaming" fire batons.

The Indian,Felipe Rose, has that nice, smooth look and wears cut off jeans and a headress and when he prances around, makes noise like a wind chime tinkling.

The Leather man, Glenn Hughes (rest in peace)sounds pretty effeminate.

The Construction worker, David Hodo, has a musical number where he tries to escape from a bunch of adoring women...

Then there is Lulu, who seems to be female... mostly, but she reminds me of a drag queen.

Which begs a question? How come almost all the Homo imagery here is for males. How come the lesbians get left out?

And how come a lot of this movie is "looped". Even a lot of stage shot stuff seems to have been redubbed in post production. It made me think I was watching a forign movie sometimes.

Ahhh well, you'll have a lot of fun with this. You'll be in disbelief that the thinly disguised homoerotic undertones went over the heads of the powers that be. Perhaps they were too busy watching Valerie Perrine "stick out".

Bad movie fans will be in their glory too. It's not everyday that a big budget movie like this is so hilariously and ineptly executed.

And hang on to your hats boys and girls, that great video company Anchor Bay has bought the rights to this movie and it will be on DVD in April 2002. Hopefully it will be a special edition, with a widescreen transfer and 5.1 remix and I'll be one of the first to get it.

I still like the Village People and love this campy, bizarre, collosal misfire of a movie.