Die Kids von Orlando

Teenage orphans Abby (Lori Loughlin) and Loren (Shannon Presby) go to live with their aunt and uncle in Florida, who run a combination gas station and amusement park. Abby attracts the attention of scumbag Eddie Dutra (James Spader) and his redneck buddies. When Abby rejects them, the punks harass her and her family. Loren tries to get even which leads to Abby being kidnapped. Now it's a life or death showdown vs the rednecks.

Not a horror movie like the poster implies but an action-thriller that sadly has nothing to do with New Kids on the Block. The '80s was a decade full of revenge movies. Most were more brutal than this. But I suppose that might make this more accessible than, say, the Death Wish series. The cast here is decent. Shannon Presby had a short-lived career but that appears to be by choice as he does fine here. Lori Loughlin is very pretty and personable. Every time I see one of her pre-Full House movie roles I have to wonder what the world was smoking in the '80s that prevented her from becoming a bigger star. We're also teased with a nude shower scene from her in this but, alas, it's just a tease. Carrot-topped Eric Stoltz plays Lori's boyfriend. I doubt I'll ever fully get his appeal. Eddie Jones plays the likable but irresponsible uncle ("Soon enough, we're gonna be fartin' through silk"). Tom Atkins appears all-too-briefly. The guys playing the rednecks are over-the-top goofy and not the least bit scary. The standout of the movie is, obviously, a scenery-chewing platinum blonde James Spader as the creepy villain. It's his movie, really. This was written by Stephen Gyllenhaal, father of Maggie. She would later have her first big role in Secretary, which starred Spader. Two degrees of separation. The gang of school toughs that back up Spader do not seem like the kind of dudes a guy like him would be hanging with. Something tells me the part Spader was cast for and the part he played weren't exactly the same.

It's an OK time-passer. Nothing terribly special but worth a peek for fans of '80s cheese. Dig the montage with generic rock music when Loren prepares for the big fight. Love the '80s!

Brother and sister Loren (Shannon Presby) and Abby (Lori Loughlin) find their lives turned upside down when their parents are killed in a car crash. Off they go to live with eccentric Uncle Charlie (Eddie Jones) at his rundown Santa's Funland amusement park in Florida. Naturally, they become the target of the local bullies led by Eddie Dutra (James Spader, with bleach blonde hair, horrific shirts and ridiculous accent). After slaughtering teens in Friday THE 13TH (1980), producer-director Sean Cunningham took it easy on them in SPRING BREAK (1983). Since that didn't deliver Friday level returns, he jumped back into the dead kids genre but with a 80s revenge motif rather than stalk-n-slash. This is about what you would expect from the time period save a nasty mean streak of violent death that sets it apart from something like bully classic THE KARATE KID (1984). Cunningham goes out of his way to make sure you never see the heroes kill anyone directly. I guess that is why they are the good guys? The film ends with the ridiculous coda of the Uncle's theme park thriving because of the shootout that happened there and a younger sibling of those offering a stare that can only mean THE NEW KIDS II. It never happened.

The New Kids is a likable eighties movie from veteran horror director/producer Sean S. Cunningham (Friday the 13th). There are quite a few flaws in it, but it's too much fun to condemn for that. I stumbled across it in the horror section, and yet, it's the furthest thing from a horror flick. It's more along the lines of Paul Lynch's Bullies really. It could almost be considered a thriller, but there's just enough cheese on the surface to keep it from being too scary. It's still well worth a sitting though. The great, young cast is fun to watch, including Eric Stoltz (Killing Zoe) and James Spader (Wolf), who is hilarious and evil at the same time as the crazy redneck, Dutra. Another reason I like this film is the presence of one of my favorite genre actors, Tom Atkins (brief as it may be). The climax, well, the climax makes the movie. It's very well done (especially the pit bull scene) and everyone should walk away pleased. If you're looking for an interesting revenge flick, rent The New Kids.

The New Kids is probably best for fans of the cast or anyone satisfied by mediocre teen 80s movies. This is one of those movies about a bunch of psychotic weirdos trying to do as much damage as possible to two innocent victims, leaving you to wonder what the heck these kids did to push the antagonists so far over the edge.

Here, our innocent victims are Abby (Lori Laughlin) and Loren (Shannon Presby). After their parents died, the brother and sister go to live in an amusement park (how awesome is that?) where their relatives (surrogate parent-types) live and work.

The psychos are led by Eddie Dutra (James Spader) a sadistic albino, and his gang of merry men (one of which is the excellent John Philbin who 80s fans will remember as 'Turtle' from the surf adventure, North Shore). Anyways, Eddie wants Abby, and what Eddie wants, he gets. But when Abby pushes him away after several forceful advances, sadistic control-freak Eddie doesn't want it to look like he let a girl weaken him. He and the gang go after Lorren, Abby, and their family, in a do or die situation.

Despite having a decent finale of chases and destruction, the movie has a very simple story. Unfortunately, it can also be quite sappy during those brother-sister inspiration talks. Abby and Lorren are willing to fight back against Eddie and his gang once and for all after so many of his vicious acts against them and their family, but for such tough kids (especially Abby), they do seem to come off as bitterly sappy sometimes.

Unfortunately, too, the movie has a very simple story. I watched it on the Spanish Channel (I don't understand Spanish) and I figured everything out alright. It's a generic story, but one you'll like if that's what you're into or if you're fans of the actors in this film.

THE NEW KIDS is top-of-the-line moviemaking with a gleefully sleazy gloss.

Cunningham, director of the first FRIDAY THE 13TH and the godawful DEEP STAR SIX, really does himself proud in this Southern-set rape/revenge thriller.

Two kids, whose parents have died, start a new life at their uncle and aunt's luridly low rent carnival.

Lori Laughlin, who plays one of the kids, becomes the target of sociopathic Dutra (James Spader in his best perf ever) and his gang of disgusting miscreants because she's so damn delicious looking. Essentially, the boys want her booty and will break any law to get it.

The film succeeds so well because it embraces its exploitation elements (sex, drugs, violence, teen lust, guns, vicious dogs) with such relish and delivers on its promise unpretentiously but stylishly. It is extremely well directed and acted and moves at a peppy clip.

You really do care about the characters and the film's Lalo Schifrin score nails the drama like a whore to a floorboard,

The carnival setting is a doozy and a triumph of production design; and the film's final scene has a black, perverse feel to it that had me nodding with approval.

A classic, and I'm not going to follow that with "of it's genre" because I'm tired of reviewers singling out films like this as less noteworthy because they're nasty.

Nope, a classic piece of cinema in anybody's book and titled STRIKING BACK in some markets.