Masterblaster

For the first time I watched this movie ten years ago and then I thought that this one is great. Well, in that time I was 7 years old and each primitive movie was a great for me. Two months ago I watched "Master Blaster" again, but only now I understand as far as this movie stupid and absurd. It's more looks like thriller than action.

First and foremost, this movie has one of the greatest title tracks ever produced. Be warned for, if you have never seen this movie, the Masterblaster theme song will likely be etched into your brain until your dying day, should you choose to watch. It's just that good.

I've watched this stupid thing countless times and I have to admit that I love this movie. In fact, it is one of my all-time favorites. All the characters are over the top cheesy, serious 80's action flick stereotypes to the hilt, and they even had the courtesy of starting the movie with the redneck bar fight scene, rather than wait 20 or 30 minutes into the movie, like most action flicks do. They don't mess around! And the ending? Spectacular! One of the best ever! If you are a fan of 80's action schlock, I can't recommend this one enough.

You've probably never heard of this before and there's a good reason for that. The IMDb also lists very few user-comments and external reviews and, once again, there's a very good reason for that, too. The only people who accidentally stumbled upon a copy of "Masterblaster" probably just watched it because the title sounded cool and the VHS cover art looked cheesy enough to guarantee undemanding 80's entertainment. Well, surely this prototypical 80's guff keeps you entertained, but for all the wrong reasons. The soundtrack is atrocious, people have the weirdest and absolute most flamboyant hairstyles, the plot is utterly senseless (just wait until you witness the final twist!) and the one-dimensional characters are all such losers you hope none of them will survive. "Masterblaster" is a movie about grown up people participating in a paintball-tournament for money. A never before seen collection of stereotypes (including the introvert loner on his bike, the meditating oriental guy, the drunken redneck trio and a long list of others…) gather for the national "Master Blaster" finale in the Southern woods to 'kill' each other with toy guns and bullets of red paints until there's only one contestant left to take home the $50.000. Needless to say someone's taking the game and his/her competition a little too serious and starts eliminating the players with slightly more effective weapons. The set-up, and in fact the entire film is somewhat similar to "TAG: The Assassination Game" (Nick Castle, 1982). Sadly enough both movies largely ignore the horror/thriller elements of the potentially suspenseful concept and go straight for clichéd situations and goofy humor. "Master Blaster" actually just turns into a survival thriller – and not even a very compelling one – after more than 45 minutes of drunken jokes and terrible shots of idiots spontaneously dancing to the most horrid 80's tunes you've ever heard. But, in spite of all the ineptitude you'll at least have to admit that the script tries hard to uphold the "mystery" regarding the killer's identity and motivations. There are several miserable excuses for red herrings, like vengeful hillbillies and romances of the past, but it's all just a little too obviously misleading. Besides, the eventual denouement is so unbelievably stupid (downright retarded, in fact) that nobody in their right state of mind could ever predict it. Okay, this is really bad stuff, but I have to admit it was fun to watch. At least the film is never boring and it's undeniably charming to see enthusiast amateur 80's actors try their best and yet still fail. There's also a bit of nudity, although it's always the wrong chick who takes her top off, and – as stated before – the soundtrack is just priceless.

This movie isn't for everyone. Going in, I expected it to be a 'bad' movie, really that's why I bought it. It was $1 by the way, my local video store went out of business so I bought like 20 tapes. But, bad as it is, it was still fun for me to watch.

Two things that bothered was the police woman asking the Vietnam dude if he really killed women and children in Nam. Well...if they just met a few hours ago, they only announced he was 'a real killer' in the war at the meeting, and the guy is a loner, how the hell does she know this? Also, the ending is pretty stupid. But, I laughed because of how corny it was. The theme song is pretty sweet too.

Worth a rental if you're into obscure 80s movies with poor acting, weak plots, and clichéd characters. My only misfortune is that the video store I bought this from was the only good one around here and Blockbuster doesn't rent stuff like this.

My review was written in July 1987 after watching the movie on Prism video cassette.

Currently in regional release ahead of its home video destiny, "Masterblaster" is another entry in the stillborn genre of mock killing games that get out of hand (e.g., "TAG: The Assassination Game", "Gotcha" or "The Zero Boys").

Jeff Moldovan (who also co-scripted) plays Jeremy Hawk, a Vietnam ve involved in a tournament to decide who is masterblaster, the best at a survival/fortune hunt course in which losers are shot with red paint rather than bullets. Of course, a madman is on the loose, killing the participas for real. Despite humorous red herrings, including Hawk's rumored background of war atrocities, killer's identity is fairly easy to guess, though his motives are unbelievable when finally revealed.

Low-budget actioner shot in Florida is heavy on talk. Typical of recent pictures in which stunt persons figure prominently both behind and in front of the camera, pic's acting is flat, particularly that of taciturn lead Moldovan. Several false endings in which characters thought to be dead turn out to be still kicking come off as extremely hokey.