American Teens

While anyone who claims to have watched this movie simply for the Danny Bonaduce shots is clearly in denial of their libido, it is indeed a fine performance, meaning pleasurably hideous.

Danny is some kind of semi-famous celebrity MC here in the movie, which makes you wonder if he wasnt playing himself in this role, so to speak. The shining moment of this movie, outside of the nude scenes, is when Danny gets onstage with his band to sing a song called "Shake it Baby," a song which really has no other words than those. And who can ever forget the scene in which Danny Bonaduce (Richie) finds himself in bed with a live seal and enjoying the action? God knows I have tried to forget, but it is stained on my retina.

There are lots and lots and lots of flopping, nude women in this movie, which serves its purpose rather well I guess. However, when you are done looking at the girls, some scenes to watch out for are: robot maid enters sorority house to find the secret cache of stolen money, extra large nude woman saves the day in a hot air balloon, and perhaps the strangest -- girls make hundreds of dollars selling "pies" consisting only of whip cream on a plate with glued-on nude sorority girl pictures.

If for nothing else, apart from the Bonaduce madness and the kooky bumbling crooks, you have to see this movie to observe the unmeasurable extremes filmmakers will go to in trying to justify what is patently gratuitous nudity. Strip football?

H.O.T.S. is a fun film for a trip back to when skin flicks had a more positive fun-filled agenda. They were made simply to titillate and have a few laughs. Everything seems less cynical and jaded. The girls all have natural figures and some are Playboy playmates. The simple plot deals with a group of young women who open a non-sanctioned sorority house to get back at the snooty sorority girls who spurned and insulted them. Instead of the mean spirited tricks of today, most of the hijinks are simply innocent fun. The women are decent actresses for this genre and are mostly very attractive. To keep our attention between the topless scenes, we have mafia henchmen, a stolen bear, a hot air balloon, a funky house mother, and the cheapest robot ever seen. There's even Danny Bonnaducci of the Partridge Family. If you have a sense of humor then let yourself go and enjoy some light entertainment.

This film is a throwback to the pre-siliconized days of Hollywood. We here at the academy admire the blossoming of natural talent as it explodes onto the screen. The film centers around the exploits of a bevy of buxom beauty outcasts (Susan Kiger, Pamela Jean Bryant, Kimberly Cameron, Lisa London, Angela Aames) as they form a sorority. Their nemesis is the snobby sorority with its buxom beauties (Lindsay Bloom, K.C. Winkler). College hijinks prevail as the film brings forth the truth about typical sorority behavior: showering, topless sunbathing, topless skydiving, wet T-shirt contests, outsmarting the pesky dean, and strip football. That's right, strip football: score a TD and the opposing team loses an article of clothing. This definitely is an Eye Candy Hall of Fame moment and causes us to reflect that they don't make movies like this anymore. As football fans it pains us to actually hope for a weak pass rush and lapses in the secondary coverage for both teams. Fire up the grill, open a beer, and enjoy the game.

h.o.t.s. is one of those sexy 70's drive in movies that features many of playboys famous playmates from the 70's like sexy tall blonde Susan kiger,Pamela jean Bryant,Lisa London,kc winkler and the late sexy Angela Ames.and would you believe a post partridge family Danny bonaduce?its the snobby girls verses the good girls(the hots girls)led by Susan kiger.there's a couple of comedy relief gangsters,a runaway bear,a trained seal,misplaced bras,etc;etc;think animal house meets hooters.h.o.t.s. is an enjoyable little comedy with t& a no complaints here.i actually think that Susan kiger was one of playboys sexiest playmates from the 70's.she did do a few more movies including deathscreams.if you like fun drive in movies you will no doubt enjoy h.o.t.s. 7 out of 10

"H.O.T.S." is an unashamedly exploitative sex comedy flick that followed hot on the heels of "National Lampoon's Animal House", a box-office smash in the late '70s. It was also possibly inspired by all those "Swinging Cheerleaders" movies, which were basically pornographic. It was scripted, surprisingly, by two women.

The plot concerns a group of girls who are blackballed from a snooty sorority, and thus decide to start their own, named "H.O.T.S." after the first initial of each girl. They decide to use their feminine attributes to steal the boyfriends on the rival sorority. Perhaps its most famous scenes are publicity stunts the H.O.T.S. girls pull: a topless parachute jump and a game of strip football.

Of course there is a bizarre subplot about hired goons doing god-knows-what. I wasn't really able to follow these scenes. One of them involves a bear in the swimming pool. The girls also get a seal on a chain somehow, and claim that the name of their sorority stands for "Help Out the Seals".

The girls have a jock strap raid at a frat house, which features a lot of young men wandering around semi naked.

One of the H.O.T.S. girls is kidnapped and bound and gagged. They shave her hair off.

Some random guy appears to have a skull shaped like a cone? I didn't understand that part. It's a bizarre sight.

There is also an ugly fat girl in the movie, and I'm not sure what she was there for.

The movie "climaxes" in the aforementioned strip-football game. The girls play in bikinis, and take their tops off eventually. The movie completely fails to build suspense for this supposedly climactic moment, and films the game ineptly - but who cares about that, right? You want nudity. You get it... sort of. The movie's inept direction doesn't take advantage of so many topless girls by giving you a good look. In fact, the whole movie is a bit like that. The nudity seems incidental, whereas to the people watching the movie, it's anything but - it's the whole reason you watched it in the first place.