Sextette

There are only a very few moments of absolute awe which I can recall in my life. What is not reflected in the blurb about this film, and the comments referring to Miss West's embarrassing appearance in this film, is the effect she had on the cast and crew when she entered the set on the Paramount lot. We were in the "gym" waiting to begin shooting, talking and yapping away as actors will do at 7 AM before anything gets going, when the double doors to the set opened, and as each person turned and looked at the lady entering and realized it was Mae West, they fell silent - until you could have heard a pin drop or your heart beating just a bit faster and louder. Miss West may have been a poor shadow of what she had been years before, but she was still Mae West. Incredible as it may seem, at eighty years old she radiated a presence I have felt from very few others. Later on, while shooting a scene with her, and the director was loudly yelling at her through her ear-piece, rather than becoming angry at the rude treatment she was getting, she simply turned to me with that Mae West smile; and in one look she said, "It's okay kid, I'm Mae West, who the hell gives a damn about him." When I looked back at her, somewhat in awe, she winked. Ultimately, she did the take the way she wanted to do it. Maybe the public will never see that scene as I saw it played out, but I will never forget it.

It's too easy to dismiss SEXTETTE as just another tacky bad movie. It is actually more of a camp classic. Mae West, aged 85 at the time of shooting, may well have been having the last laugh here. She lampoons herself wildly in this incredible film version of her own stage play, involving an actress of a certain age visiting London to star in a new production. Choice dialog: "Miss Manners, what did you think of Big Ben?" "Oh, I don't believe I've met the gentleman". As the film progresses, all pretence at serious production seemingly goes out of the window. Rock stars Alice Cooper, Ringo Starr and Keith Moon make suitably sozzled mid-70s L.A. styled appearances for no good reason, and future James Bond Timothy Dalton hams up no end his role as Mae's youthful beau. And then suddenly, the film becomes a musical. Truly incredible, a must-see for fans of high camp.

To truly appreciate "Sextette" one has to truly appreciate Mae West!And to truly appreciate Mae West one must know and understand her life and her persona!Just forget any other Hollywood actress!Mae West stands alone in a class by herself!She is entirely her own creation and spent her lifetime maintaining and nurturing that creation!There exists a few GOOD books about her!And even her autobiography sheds light on HER view of herself and her effect on the world(as she believed it revolved around her!) Mae West was a small,husky,talented,brassy girl from Brooklyn who decided early in life to become a sexy,living legend long before she finally arrived in Hollywood (at age 39) She succeeded at a time when overweight and overaged leading ladies were unheard of!(they still are!) Everything from her golden hair,her hourglass figure,her purring voice and sassy,hip-swinging strut she devoloped through years of self-discipline and self-worship!By the time she became a world-famous movie star she was already in her 40s,wearing wigs,corsetts,wedge-heels,practicing exercises and birth-control devices decades ahead of her time! Which,of course,brings us to "Sextette" Based on a musical play of her own creation it would seem almost inconcievable to have anyone else portray her character!And remember,Mae West WAS her own character!The blond wigs,slinky gowns,diamonds and furs were STILL part of Mae's everyday persona well into her 80s!This was a woman who never had children nor cared for anyone but herself!SHE BELIEVED in her ageless,sexy siren and all that came with it!By all accounts Mae was remarkably agile and well-preserved!It would have been nice to have seen her WITHOUT the gauzy photography and artificial get-up!

Antediluvian legend Mae West shuffles about in the feathers and beads of her youth, callomaniacally adoring her petrifying visage in anything that casts a reflection...beneath the golden locks of her enormous and very obvious wig, there must have been at least 15 pounds of Scotch tape and rubber bands straining to reverse the gravitational causatum of many passing decades. An unlikely multitude of men fall over themselves in awe of her bewitching feminine mystique while the very pallid and disoriented looking Ms. West spouts her famed pre-code one-liners as though they were fresh as a spring rose. There's some narrative nonsense in the folds concerning the U.S. government's plan to ease political tensions by enlisting Mae and her irresistible animal prowess.

A tacky, jaw-dropping trainwreck boiling over with callithumpian musical numbers, SEXTETTE is also a treasure trove of unpremeditated humor. Essential viewing for those with a fondness for kitsch, but true-blue fans of Ms. West might opt to cover their eyes and ears. Mae's true age during production remains speculative, as her birth certificate is a thus far unpublished papyrus fragment excavated at Oxyrhynchus.

3.5/10

This is right up there with "Can't Stop the Music" as wonderfully inspired trash. I find it funny that so many people are offended by Mae's appearance and numerous flirtations in this film. These are the same yokels who laugh at Bob Hope or George Burns when they chat up a young babe. It's nice to see the tables turned. Mae is grand - there's no other word for her- and her statue-like appearance (due to God knows how many face lifts and layers of make-up) actually help to accentuate the nature of her cinema icon glory. She always was bigger-than-life.

The plot of this film and the musical numbers are truly terrible, but they're there merely as plot devices for Mae to strut her stuff, and for Timothy Dalton to rack up enough embarrassing moments to cancel out his entire career even if he makes it to Mae's age! This movie always was meant to be camp, since Mae has always been the reigning camp queen, but of course it also tried to pass as real Hollywood entertainment, which means that there's a lot of unintentional humor too. There are tons of witty lines, and it's fun to see this huge gallery of stars (I barely recognized Alice Cooper without his long hair and smeared mascara. He looked like Paul Jabara, which I bet was intentional). I would not recommend seeing this film on an empty stomach, as seeing Timothy Dalton breaking out into "Love Will Keep Us Together" will cause a severely nasty involuntary reaction. But for fans of true camp, this movie is an absolute must see!