Die Kröte

Ah, Mr. Umberto Lenzi … The man is a legend and a personal hero of mine, but I can't deny that "Brothers till we Die" is one of the most pointless and overlong Italian cult flicks I ever had to endure in my life. Lenzi single-handedly was responsible for copious amounts of notorious horror movies an he even is the second best Italian director in the field of violent crime movies (after Fernando Di Leo, hands down), but "Brothers till we Die" just looks as if it's a quickly scripted and nonchalant project to kill some spare time. The film suffers from a (too) thin storyline and – even worse – it carries on even long after the basic storyline has ended. Approximately 75% of the film is purely pointless padding where absolutely nothing happens apart from cult-veteran Tomas Millian giving a one-man double role show. He portrays the hunchbacked crime-lord of a big city as well as his docile brother with a nasty beard. Quasimodo-Millian plots a tremendously big heist, but he quickly gets double-crossed by his associates. He then engages his brother and uses him to fulfill his vengeance plans. Everything, from the planning of the heist over the treason and even the revenge itself, takes place during the first hour of the film, but for some inexplicable reason the story continues for yet nearly another full hour and it revolves on … absolutely nothing at all. The second half of the film simply depicts – in annoyingly great detail – the love/hate relationship between the Marazzi-twins but it's uninteresting, dull and entirely without excitement. "Brothers till we Die" is a complete embarrassment compared to "Almost Human" (Lenzi's ultimate crime-masterwork) and it's sometimes even difficult to accept the same cinematic "genius" made both movies. There's a severe lack of violence in this movie, the characters don't really have enough sadistic baggage and there's only ONE car-chase, which isn't even that impressive. Where's all the excitement? What happened to sleazy and politically incorrect sub plots? Where's all the stylish photography and lurid musical guidance? And, the most important question of them all remains: Who was the guy in the director's chair and what did he do to Umberto Lenzi?

When it comes to Italian crime films, Umberto Lenzi is undoubtedly the king of the Italian Polizi sub-genre, and while this film doesn't quite live up to the ones that went before it; Brothers Till We Die is still an interesting and entertaining little film that is sure to please fans of this sort of stuff. This was the last of Lenzi's crime collaborations with the great Tomas Milian, and it's also the most ambitious use of the actor. Here, Milian is given the task of playing two brothers, but since this is a cheapo Italian effort where special effects weren't really affordable, the effect is generated entirely through editing, and it has to be said that Lenzi does a good job. The plot is somewhat routine and simply follows a familiar revenge curve. Francesco and Vincenzo are brothers; Francesco is a bum better known as "Pigsty" and Vincenzo is a hunchback who gets called "Humpo" (you gotta love Italians!). The plot focuses more on Vincenzo, a wanted man who "rears his hump" in order to commit another robbery. However, things don't go to plan as his accomplices decide to shoot him (he's too noticeable, and therefore runs a risk of getting them all caught). Vincenzo manages to drag himself into a sewer, and then proceeds to get revenge...

The film doesn't feature the greatest script ever written (not even the greatest script ever written for a trashy Italian film!), but the silly dialogue is often very funny and the film's absolute disregard for political correctness when it comes to the lead character's disfigurement is just great. Obviously, a lot of this film's success (or lack of) rests on the shoulders of Tomas Milian, and despite being given a rather heavy role; he doesn't manage to turn a great performance. His "Pigsty" character is a messy imitation of the "Garbage Can" character from Free Hand for a Tough Cop, while the hunchback character is a lot more like Milian's forte; but the make-up intrudes on the performance, and neither one comes off particularly well. However, I'd much rather have Tomas Milian in the role than anyone else, and he does always make the film worth watching in spite of its shortcomings. The plot flows nicely enough throughout and it's usually entertaining. Lenzi has also seen fit to throw in a sub-plot revolving around the hunchback's attitude towards his disability, which feels a bit odd but works fairly well nonetheless. Overall, this is a decent enough slice of Italian police action and I'm sure most people that see it will enjoy it.

Bright and breezy with colourful action and even more colourful characters, its just that it is all just a little too silly. Tomas Milian stars twice, yes, that's right, he stars as a pair of twin brothers. One is a fairly simple working guy, the other a crazed and criminal hunchback. Milian manages to overact in both roles and to look ridiculous in them both too, with the most terrible wigs. But then maybe Lenzi thought this would be amusing, he certainly thinks a lot of other things amusing that somehow we no longer do and in most cases never did. The French get a dig, the Albanians even more, hunchbacks, of course as well as homosexuals and transvestites and feminists. Quite a role call but the whole episode in the lunatic asylum being played for laughs is quite extraordinary and something I have previously only seen in Hong Kong Cat3 films. There is another extraordinary scene in this and it takes place in a restaurant where Milian as the hunchback rogue turns his wrath upon the rich and famous that had seen fit to laugh at him and this just about makes the film worth a watch.

This movie is a masterpiece (of course considering the genre and the historical period of the film). Tomas Milian, that plays both the parts of the two brothers, proves again to be a really great actor. The Italian slang (from Rome) is an essential part of the movie as well the vulgar jokes typical of many Tomas Milian Italian characters. Soundtrack also is great. Some of the scenes are memorable and the characters of the two brothers are very charismatic. Also the the movie has a more dramatic and serious tone compared to other Tomas Milian movies of that genre but at the same time doesn't lack of very funny moments. For me (considering that is an Italian 70's police movies) it deserves a 10/10 vote.

The bullet-blasted Italian classic,'Banda Del Gobbo' aka 'Brothers Till We Die' (1978) is another eminently watchable, explosively exhilarating, Lenzi/Milian poliziotteschi collaboration supercharged with an especially demonstrative performance by the legendary, Tomas Milian, this time zestfully portraying a disparate duo of misfit, street tough siblings, 'Il Gobbo' & 'Monnezza'. Happily, the scenery masticating, Milian jauntily dons the same pimptastic fright wig from, Stelvio Massi's 'Destruction Force', thus allowing any confused viewer to swiftly differentiate the aesthetic, moral, and tonsorial subtleties betwixt the two titular characters! Clearly, Tomas Milian fans, and avid Euro-crime addicts will find this riotously rumbustious entry in maestro, Lenzi's extensive poliziotteschi pantheon to be a supremely worthy addition to their collection! Alongside, Milian's enviable screen magnetism, the driving crime funk brilliance of, Franco Micalizzi's grittily effective, infectiously funky soundtrack provides an additional lustre to, Umberto Lenzi's truly outstanding poliziottesco. This stunning 88 Films Blu-ray restoration is a thing of lurid beauty!